Just wondering if anyone can share their withdrawal experiences with me? More info why below.
I’m writing because I have a little concern for my mum. She’s been battling with alcoholism for several years now but after a brief period of not feeling well she decided to cut down.
She was drinking in excess of 90 units a week for about 6 years since her dad died, but she was having bad episodes of ibs, passing out and just generally feeling rubbish. She felt so rubbish she’s not even wanted a drink and she’s been having about 2 measures of standard spirit a day at most, some days going completely dry, which compared to the triple home measures about 7 times a day is considerably less. Before she’s realised it’s day 14 she’s been on the lower dose but she feels lousy (fatigue, no appetite, nausea, more ibs symptoms.) I have assured her they’re all to do with the withdrawal from what she was drinking, but now it’s getting to the point where she’s barely eating anything and hasn’t been for 3 weeks or so. She absolutely refuses the GP too which is frustrating. But I’m not sure if withdrawal should be lasting this long given she’s been drinking so heavily for so long?
Just hope someone can put my mind at ease?
thanks for listening
Hayley x
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iOwlface
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For your mum to cut down by that much, so quickly is extremely dangerous. It can sometimes lead to alcoholic fits, and severe withdrawal.
Whilst it is a great thing to do, cutting down without the proper help is not a good idea. Your mum will need to relief drink for now, whilst lowering her consumption.
Every time your mum gets the shakes, I would suggest she has a little drink to calm herself, but no more than that. Ensure she's drinking plenty of fluids, and eating where she can. If she has any vitamin B strong or thiamine, suggests she takes this.
I suggest she refer herself to the local drug and alcohol service, where she will be assessed, and then possibly see a doctor. They will require bloods and a GP summary. They can request that.
There are medications that can be given via a community detox if she wants to stop completely. However it will take time, so bear with her and agreed with by a doctor. It is not safe to simply give up, given the volume she has been drinking, so therfore seek the proper help.
You may be able to access help without going to the doctors from the local alcohol and drugs groups. Please look after yourself too. Al anon for families have a helpline and may be able to support and advise al-anonuk.org.uk/
It can be really rough. Main issue is to get liver _and_ pancreas checked out. Liver for obvious reasons (through blood tests to spot indicators of damage), but much of what I went through was pancreatitis, partly diagnosed through an ultrasound.
I'm sorry for your mom and her loss. I know I self-medicated my depression for many years, but the fact is...everything your describing also sounds like your mom may be not dealing with her loss and is trying to obliterate the feelings, but the alcohol is a depressant, so obviously it's not helping. It's not a matter of cutting down the drinking, it's more of a matter from what your describing as her needing help with not only stopping drinking, but how to manage her grief and loss and come to some kind of acceptance.
We do a lot of things to push aside things we just can't cope with, and some can be very self-destructive. But it's not hopeless. Being a sober person who also suffers from depression...I can tell you that therapy along with being sober is what saved me from my own spiral down the dark abyss. We cannot make anyone do anything they don't want to, and we can't fix them, and we especially don't want to enable their self-destructive behavior, not guilt, or pleading, or ultimatums are going to work with someone who is pretty far down the rabbit hole.
But if you can in anyway find a professional third party that understands addiction and grief and loss therapy, it could be a game changer. But you have no control over the outcomes, it's heartbreaking and I'm so sorry for you going through this.
Good morning everyone, thanks for all your advice, kind words and support ❤️
She finally caved and we got to see the GP yesterday. He’s diagnosed her as suffering from Gastritis (I’ve had it before on a course of steroids from my asthma it’s horrid!)
The GP gave her Lansoprazole and Thiamine. He did say he would prescribe anti emetics too but he missed them off 🤦🏼♀️ however she’s not had an episode of dry heaving this morning for the first time in 3 weeks! We might be on the up here 🤞🏻
He did say she came off the drink too quickly, basically cold turkey, and she’s possibly still suffering from withdrawal a little, but he advised to bin the other little units and go T-total.
He did also recommend counselling - I’ve told her this before but she can be a stubborn old ox! I’ve been through the mental health system and found it fantastic (it just didn’t last long enough!) she’s a little more open minded now but wants to recover and get some energy back first before making any moves, I will keep pushing though!
He did also mention AA to her, she did say no initially but again I’ll keep pushing for her to go. I think the incentives will help, the little rewards would appeal to me and I know they would to her too. A lot of the time we both tend to feel a bit unappreciated, she’s said to me when she’s spoken to me, so I think the little nod of so much time sober and the reward, How ever small, will help
The thing about AA and similar non-profit free recovery programs is that it offers a support group of others in recovery, and that in and of itself helps with the emotional pain. Your obviously a loving person to be there for your mom, but remember that you have to take care of you too, it's exhausting dealing with health issues, and something like alcohol and depression are heavy subjects and sometimes It's good to remember to let others help with the heavy lifting. But ultimately it's your mom's choice. There's no judgement, guilt, shame or blame in recovery....it's choosing life. And as much as your mom is dealing with....it's a family disease...it affects everyone. There is also a support group called Al-Anon for the family who need to be supported as well.
Best wishes, and much love to you and your family through all of this...trust me...I know.
I’m glad your mum saw her GP. And his advice is spot on. Hopefully she’ll utilize the extra support (AA and therapy). In my experience, they both work wonders. And think about Alanon for yourself
Who better to know than someone like you who has been in sobriety longer than many members her have been on the planet. Glad to see you my friend....hope all is well.
the best thing for her to go A&E so they can medicate her i been there a few times and what they call a banana bag which a yellow colour and his on a drip
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Quick update before people think I've disappeared through not being able handle the group debates 🙂
Hi, needing support...
At war with myself. 
