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Dad’s Coming Home After TESTING Hospital Safeguarding Policy.... In Not Conventional Way

22 Replies

Who would think it .... and you could not write this.

Well dad got over bad infection and funky clotted blood issues.

Only to be foul mouthed by others on ward WHY becouse Of he’s disturbed sleep vision issues AS well as Alzheimer’s Dementia That makes my dad feel vaunrable.

Well on this day at hospital I was there AND best way to describe going’s after WHAT I heard was a riot.

Talk about inconsiderate patients well they all got it AFTER dad had told me they had been going up to he’s bed threatening him and telling him to shut up.

Clearly not what you want to hear see especially when so vaunrable and blind.

Words well I can’t really say HOW feeling YOU assume most people are decent when in hospital CLEARLY the not and should be treated accordingly

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22 Replies
sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Hi JAS, good news about your dad’s infection but I do feel it’s a shame that Alzheimer sufferers can’t be better cared for in hospital.

Sadly everyone on your dad’s ward are ill so are not at their best. Staff should not allow your dad to be threatened though.

I really hope things improve a little at least. Take care xxxx

in reply tosassy59

Hi sassy do agree everybody I’ll so bit of consideration would not go a miss given some could be going though bad time

I think patients seeing my dad being feed is good clue as to he’s condition IF ever I had issues I see ward manager or nurse NEVER would I intimidate or threaten anyone wile in hospital.

sassy59 profile image
sassy59 in reply to

You’re a good man JAS and I wish you well. Keep your dad safe, take care of you too. Xxx

in reply tosassy59

I did think that’s all I need given heart issues BUT ant that usally what happens.

Cheers thanks

Hi JAS, First of all I'm happy for you that dad got through his infection and is coming or has come home, but I do understand how you feel about his verbal abuse from other patients.

It's a great pity that so many people now feel entitled to have everything their own way and never stop to consider that there are valid reasons why they are sometimes inconvenienced. And don't even understand that there are procedures to be followed if they are being disturbed, so that a decision can be made at nursing level what to do to mitigate any nuisance being caused by someone who really can't help himself.

Of course your dad would not only feel vulnerable but be vulnerable. Aggression doesn't always just stop with angry words.

Happily he's either at home or soon will be, where he has someone much more understanding to take care of him.

Wishing you both well and hoping for your dad's further improvement in physical health.

in reply to

Hi Callendersgal defo second everything you have said ... I thought yup that’s about it AND if out is going to happen it’s weekends when BANK staff are not intrested and this no doctors about.

AND sure enough it did BUT what did go in my favour WAS me and dad are frequentl flyers round AMU wards so easily recognised by nurses etc from previous visits SO the no am not trouble causer in sense of abusing other patients.

After tado I told nurses what had gone on reminded nurses they have duty to make sure dad’s safe well FREE from intimidation and abuses AND to be fair nurses SEEN other patients AND told them about seriousness of what they was doing AND moved my dad to ward facing nurses with guy on ward to stop WHAT had happened happing again.

Clearly my dad was scared as could not see and shaking given what had gone on previous WAS terrible to see him like that and you don’t expect out like that to happen in our hospital’s to bed bond

FredaE profile image
FredaE

Hospitals are not good at keeping patients with sleep problems separate. I was in hospital many years ago and like the rest of the patients in the ward needed to sleep to recover. There was a poor lady there who spent literally all night saying "I'm sorry Mummmy, I'm sorry" without a break. As soon as she had her breakfast she went fast asleep all day and not a word out of her until about eight in the evening. We did not threaten her but now it seems that far too much of the "care" is administered by other patients. When my husband was in our dreadful local hospital after an accident he could not cope with the alarm system and only managed because the other patients looked after him. Another time I was kept in after day surgery and the lady in the next bed was calling for her daughter - unfortunately daughters name was Freda and I was 24 hour carer for my husband at that time so there was no chance of ignoring it - everytime she called my name I was awake and out of bed, stitches or no stitches. In the end I went and spent the night sitting in the patients lounge as there was nowhere else. Sorry for everyone but they should not allow other patients to bully your dad

in reply toFredaE

Hi FredaE

Defo can relate to things you have gone though ... my dad’s at that stage OF up all night calling out

I no it’s not he’s fault and dose not help him losing ability to distinguish Day from night.

Last thing I ever wanted was my dad being tormented at the end AND it looks like that is also part of dementia Alzheimer’s

For some reason he thinks he’s homeless walking the streets.

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60

Hello Jeff , well best your dad is home if the other patients were abusive. Sadly the system now says patients have to be intergrated on wards. Which does not always work , nurses cannot always control other patients behaviour good or bad. Hopefully it will be less stressful for you with your father at home again, although in general dementia care is stressful. We were fortunate when my hubby was seriously ill he had a side ward, but not at first and I found it a bit degrading in the open mixed wards he was on. After all he was terminal but no hospice bed available. The services vary vastly from area to area, and ward to ward. Try and have a little unwind time to yourself now this upset with dad is over.

in reply tokatieoxo60

Hi Katie defo agree Hospital’s can’t say who’s going to be good patients or not.

My dad had been next to spice heads who never carried on like those who tried it on with dad.

Dad’s home but looks like infection AS took what bit he had left SEEMs he’s being tormented by he’s own mind NEEDLESS to say I have always strived for dad to have happy thoughts ESPECIALLY if near the end.

And that’s what got to me with what went on BEST way to describe it to lay person IS it’s like having nightmare but you never wake up.

How I can brake that cycle WELL guess can only try.

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60 in reply to

Hope you have a better day today, you can only try your best . Sadly anyone of us can develop dementia even those that upset you & your dad, illness knows no barriers, even mental health. Try to stay calm for your own healths sake, life can be very stressful at times, more so for some than others.

in reply tokatieoxo60

Hi Katie cheers n thanks hope ya doing as well as expected and legs not giving you to many issues.

As to what was said AN’T that the truth

SquirrelsHolt profile image
SquirrelsHolt

Hi JAS, and its blooming awful to read your update on Dad and the almost bully-like tactics some other patients had on him. As I've said before to you,thank goodness you were there to raise awareness. Typical it escalated over the weekend but certainly is no excuse for the lack of basic care. My Mum was chattering away to herself morning,noon and night and we wondered why she was tired out. The lady two or three beds along, shouted at me to tell her to be quiet on a visit and it was horrible but it made me think,what do they say to my Mum? I told the nurses and Mum was moved into a room /cupboard of her own. Its never easy for anybody but thank goodness youre having Dad home again.

Keep well,or as well as you can my friend.

in reply toSquirrelsHolt

Hi SquirrelHolt that as been my worry to about what go’s on when I go home and dad’s left there

Guess we all done lot tongue biting.

Don’t think dad’s very well really as still not drinking and is effort to eat

Dad was in hospital week AND now is home AND have not seen doctor once BUT as long as fixed him am not bothered really

Just wish infection clot issues had not taken what he had left

ValRMN profile image
ValRMN

Hi JAS... I've read quite a few of your posts, and I'm really sorry you are having so many problems with care providers. But honestly I find it hard to believe that you and your dad always seem to have such bad experiences from health care professionals. You do seem to be VERY unlucky!

I've been a community health care professional specialising in dementia for 25 years, I can honestly say I have NEVER heard such a consistent stream of complaints from any of my many patients over the years. Yes, occasionally someone has an issue, but on the whole I hear nothing but positive feedback and praise for services people have received both at home from community services, and in various local hospitals as out patients or in patients!

I just wanted to balance things out and reflect the other side of care experiences and I do hope you start to receive some more positive help for your dad's complex health needs. Good luck!

Val

in reply toValRMN

I only complain for a reason AS my dad can not IS hard enough trying to defend my own rights.

100% Of my complaints have been upheld by Quality Care Commission.

25 years ago hospital’s was run like a tight ship WITH sisters on each ward HAVE not done away with em BUT it’s my dad who suffers poor care abuse as result SO sure am going to complain BECAUSE when I worked I could not get away with anything never mind run a lose ship.

But I let you in on my next issue I have problem with IN hospital my dad’s given anti cloting injection BUT when home and bed bound NO one cares and no injections.

As in health care industry perhaps you might have idea.

Did ask nurses given clot in dad’s first draw blood TO be told that is very good question THE don’t have answer too as why not when at home and bed bound

Doctors know about heat stroke and what it dose to blood if on statins SO why don’t they give them out

ValRMN profile image
ValRMN in reply to

JAS these injections are actually designed to be really easy to administer and I'm sure you would find it quite simple to do them yourself - ask at your dad's surgery about this. Good luck with this, and I'm.really sorry you have had so many problems with your dad's care.

Val

in reply toValRMN

Hi ValRMN My DADs lungs have been issue over last year DOCTORS did think had cancer BUT not well enough for test and treatment would finish him off

Anyway as he as Server Dementia Alzheimer’s it’s Issue then it’s not.

But that’s my issue really as he should have clot injections AT home

I guess I will have fight on my hands like I did trying to get GP to do home ECG even tho there are community heart failure nurse’s that could done one THAT DADs gp refused to admit coverd our area.

FredaE profile image
FredaE in reply toValRMN

I am glad to hear that but sadly hospitals do vary an awful lot. If your only option is a hospital in special measures with a toxic culture you are, to say the least of it, stuffed.With tact, charm and cunning you can improve things a bit (if you as a carer can find the energy) but when you are not there things can go very badly wrong again.

I can give you an example My husband had MSA a nasty neurodegenerative disease whi ch needed medication exacly on time. Hospitals don't think like that. For most diseases it is not pills at 8.30, 11.30, 2.30, 5.30,8.30,11.30 to try to enable he patient to function for at least most of the day. Hospitals think in terms of first thing in the morning, after breaksfast, lunch tim tea time supper time .

I used to go into feed him his supper - they would feed him but it took so long that I went in to help. In order for him to be able to eat he had to have had his med i hour earlier to get it to take effect so I went in at 6.30.I could tell by looking at him if he was properly medicated. or not When I queried it they'd say it was fine he had just had his 5.30 meds a bit late but saw no problem. I saw a lot of problem because I had driven for 45 minutes through the evening rush,paid good money for the car park, simply to keep his nutrition up and he could not eat.

I had spent a lot of effort being cheerful and helpful so I was liked by the staff and they understood the problem but It was agency staff who did not follow the instructions.

In the end I got the doctor to alter the time of his medicaton. Not 5.30 but 5.13, not 2.30 but 2.13 which made the agency nurses stop in their tracks and ask what was going on and that way he got his meds on time.. I am still not sure that I should have had to put in so much effort just to get the consultants instructions carried out

in reply toFredaE

Sadly everything you have spoken about rings so true AD like to say I don’t know what you mean BUT have experienced worse and good guess like most.

Lucky for dad he got good care Really this time and quality care commission was not involved ITs a shame he’s nearly at end of he’s journey I pray it’s kind to him ONLY to be disappointed SO try my best to fill he’s days with kind happy thoughts but the dementia Alzheimer’s always win.

All any of us can do is our best unless that becomes a crime.

It’s truly shame we can not trust hospital’s to truly look after our loved ones.

MAS_Nurse profile image
MAS_Nurse

Hi Jeff,

I'm really pleased your dad is well enough to go home, but I'm sorry your dad had such a terrible experience in the hospital. No one should have to put with any kind of abuse, verbal or threatening behaviour from anyone be it, other patients or staff. Do complain to PALS (Patient Advice and Liason Service) and raise this as a safeguarding issue with vulnerable patients. If you don't get a satisfactory response then go higher to the senior management team.

Take care,

Best wishes,

MAS Nurse and Moderator

in reply toMAS_Nurse

Hi MAS_Nurse

Yer I was not happy eather with what went on BUT as was Saturday evening think I took only curse action open to me

Pals office was shut till Monday dad’s social workers work mobile phone WAS dead.

Part time advocates WHO needs em really BUT your right about no one should be subject to abuse Especially those blind or bed bond as more at risk.

But to be fair Hospital when aware DID Act ... It’s just a shame was left to me to seek help out.

Not sure someone like dad WHO dose not know how to use bed emergency button would of coped if I was not there.

Am going to raise issue with useless MPs see what they can do

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