My Final Posting..: Dear Friends, It is... - British Liver Trust

British Liver Trust

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My Final Posting..

velvet007 profile image
18 Replies

Dear Friends,

It is with great sadness that i say my beloved husband passed away suddenly on Sunday 20th November, throughout all of this he was unable to give up drinking, he died of a pulmonary embolism /and aortic stenosis.,

Myself, family and friends could not reach him, he went from a handsome strong man to a shadow of his former self., and i saw the decline over the past 2 years, it haunts me that he could have done that to himself, my only saving was that he passed away instantly, the grieving is unbearable, not for the last 2 years but for the 25 wonderful years we had before he became ill.

If anyone is reading this who has an alcoholic husband please dont beat yourself up every day like i did, begging him to change, i guess some will make changes but if they cant accept that you have lost the man you knew to alcohol and none of it is your fault.

So our doctor was right when he said a few months ago I would be a young widow 65 ! although i feel 85 !

I thank everyone on here for their support, you have been a lifeline.....

Velvet.

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18 Replies
Millie09 profile image
Millie09

Velvet..I'm so so very sorry to hear the sad news ..

My thought are with you ..

Be blessed in the knowledge he is now no longer in any grips of addiction or pain ..

Now give you and your family a time to grieve and to heal .

Be kind to yourself..

Merry Christmas ..

Best wishes linda x

MrsWorried profile image
MrsWorried

I am so sorry for your loss. Your story rings very true to me as hubby refuses to stop drinking and the decline is huge. The grip of addiction is massive.Be kind to yourself and remember the good times xx

Sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and sending strength and love to you and your family. Massive respect to you for supporting your husband throughout. Heartfelt wishes, ❤️ K xx

WOOLKITTY profile image
WOOLKITTY

I am so sorry for your loss. I have just joined this group and your story is my story too. I love him so much, despite all of this and keep telling myself that alcohol abuse is an illness too. He won’t stop and life is a constant struggle. I work full time and have to gather myself to go into his room to check he is still alive (mostly sleeping) we are both 56 and have 5 wonderful grandchildren but it’s still not enough to make him want to stop drinking. He is going downhill very fast.

Take care xx

isi123 profile image
isi123

I am so sorry for your loss.

redpoint72 profile image
redpoint72

I'm so very sorry for your loss,my deepest condolences love at this extremely sad time. Unfortunately some cannot stop,the hold of alcohol to strong....fortunately I was able to stop,although not saying easy by any stretch...but managed to beat it.One day at a time .

May your husband rest in peace.

My best. Chris

AyrshireK profile image
AyrshireK

So very sorry to hear your news, as you say at least he went quickly and without too much lingering pain. Remember the lovely man he was before alcohol stole him from you.

Thoughts with you, stay strong and hopefully still manage to enjoy the festive season.

Best wishes,

Katie xx

Lippy42 profile image
Lippy42

So sorry to read this my heart goes out to you. Addiction is cruel it took away the man you fell in love with . Sending you a big hug thankyou for sharing your story . Thinking of you x

LemonMeringue15 profile image
LemonMeringue15

So sorry for your loss and what you've been through

Adelou profile image
Adelou

💜

BritishLiverTrust5 profile image
BritishLiverTrust5ModeratorBritish Liver Trust

Dear velvet007

We're so sad to read this, and very sorry for your loss.

With best wishes from all at the British Liver Trust

Mango5cm profile image
Mango5cm

so sorry to hear your dad news . My thoughts are with you and your family . I hope the good memories of your life together bring you some comfort . With love Carol x

Mango5cm profile image
Mango5cm

sorry it should have said sad news . Xxx

Readlots profile image
Readlots

I’m so sorry for your loss. Grieving is really hard so sending you strength and love. Roll with it and know that it won’t be as hard as what you’ve already been through. X

CP2710 profile image
CP2710

Aw bless 💔💔 I watched my Dad drink himself to death and passed at 58. I guess o didn’t really understand it all at that point. But over the years I have realised that I drink more than I should and I’m worried about leaving my family in a mess.

I really hope you are getting there and have support of friends and family especially at this time of year.

Take care.

Jesue profile image
Jesue

I am so sorry for your loss. I can fully relate to your post as I lost my husband of 49 years at the end of September. He did stop drinking in March but I think it was too late for his body to recover. He really wanted to get better but had no appetite and lived on protein shots. He was fed up of lactulose and tablets. He needed enemas 3 times a day for the HE but was just so weak he couldn't put with them more than once a day.

He suffered so much I actually wish he had continued to drink and he may have gone quicker without all the suffering.

So don't think if your husband gave up alcohol he would still be here. Everyone is different. Try to think of the man you married and the happy times you had.

We cannot blame ourselves for the fact our husbands enjoyed a few drinks.

Take care of yourself as best you can.

Sending 🤗

kyia profile image
kyia

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can embrace your treasured memories of those wonderful 25 years to help you through these difficult times.

utep99 profile image
utep99

I am very sorry about you Father, Take time and realize he is no longer sick or in pain and he is happy.

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