So if you've ever wondered how to give yourself a heart attack heres one that might work for you. Forget that you have an addiction and let the addiction into your house. Put it on your counter to tease you until you cant resist any longer and you give into temptation. You think "one wont hurt . I have done so well". " whats one"? so you go for it. Now your fifteen in and your in regret. You get a glass of water and chug it back and You go to lay down on the couch as you feel guilty and want to sleep it off. You wake up in the morning forgetting what you did the night before. You sit down on the toilet and as you go to wipe you see that dreaded colour. You look down and the toilets black. You scream and trip thinking your in need of an emergency ambulance. Then it all comes flooding back to your mind. You at 15 oreos on an empty stomach with a glass of water.
Your heart slows down and you are laughing on the floor with your pants down.
Oreos on an empty stomach come out the same colour as they went in. Learn from my mistake and save yourself a heart attack. This is a true story and I thought I was friggin done for. 😳😳
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lol
Omg Phoenix! What are you like! And to think I squinted through blurry (that is blurry not a polite bloody ) eyes at 0430!!! Was it really worth it? Blurry hell - Yes 👍👍👍👍
Oh blueberries are the worst. Oddly when I actually did have a bleed a year ago I ignored it at first because I thought it was the blueberries I ate the night before. I have since seen the difference in the two. But this is the shit we have to deal with . Literally
😳💩😂
I've had something similar after eating beetroot. Thought I was bleeding to death 😂😂😂
in reply to
Did you buy it from Waitrose or Aldi?
in reply to
M&S 😏
in reply to
I forgot about those beets! 🤣
in reply to
I hear beet root is really good for you but I refuse to eat it for that reason. Lol
So, is it just the first post-Oreo-orgy 💩 that comes out colorful? All good after that? Just curious. This story is hilarious, Phoenix, and like Miles, my eyes were blurry when I tried to read it (way late at night, as I’m in the U.S.). But I pushed through – had to know if you were writing from Intensive Care or not! Btw, during certain holidays, Oreos here come with colored icing - I wonder what that would have done to your 💩?!? Seriously, glad you are OK, you had me going there! 😂
Dont mention oreos and orgy in the same sentence or I will get Randy. If I'm using that correctly. (Brett help me out here) lol. We get those multi coloured oreos around Christmas too, orange ones around Halloween, red ones at valentine's, and green ones around st. paddys day. Not sure if the icing would show up in the black mess but if it did I'd imagine the red frosting would add to the scare substantially. Lmao
Can you imagine tho if I had of ended up going to the Emergency?
"Mr Palazzo, the results are in. You have tested negative for occult blood in your stool. But you have tested positive for oreo cookie ingestion" the doctor says while picking him up by the neck of his shirt and tossing him out onto the street. 😅😅 Benny Hill music playing from some unknown location.
Had a similar experience. Called my wife to come quickly and see that I had just Peed blood. Can't explain the feeling of immense relief when she said "You silly bu***r, you've not long had 2 cheese and beetroot sandwiches." PHEW!!
Yes but I think in only some people who have something in their makeup that makes it happen. I love beetroot and if I have a lot I always have rosy pee 😆
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Finally got my letter from the consultant. 
From stable to hospice
Why are my feet hurting soo muc... Realated or not?
