I finally got my call this morning &after the longest wait ever they have reactivated me back on the transplant list.
It's a weird feeling.I'd given up & was &still am waiting for the end game.It was quite freeing knowing the end was coming.Now I know it's still coming but the surgery is so high risk.
Basically I'm ass over elbow at the mo.So greatful but very scared.
Iam sending you all my love and hope you see it through stay strong as you always do good luck to you and your family. Xx
Thanks hun.Xx I really appreciate your thoughts.I hope you are feeling alright at the moment.
You are very courageous and I wish all good for you it made me cry wen I see the bit you wrote about freeing l think your very brave and I admire your honesty .
I really hope everything goes well for you, you deserve some good fortune. Please take care. Lots of love Lynne xxxx
i understand what you mean about the acceptance thing... while i was ill i had come to the conclusion that I wasn't necessarily going to make to old bones!!!!
i was ill with pbc for 18years then transplant in may this year... i was scared but I felt.... what have I got to loose.... i wouldn't have survived without it.
keep strong and hope your call comes soon. best wishes cazer.
Yes I understand your "freeing feeling". When I was ill I went through some weeks of being terrified and not being able to sleep, I was so anxious. Then I started to accept I might well die and it was an empowering feeling.
I'm not a religious person but I started feeling that when you die there's nothing to lose you just go back to where you've always been, these words by Carl Sagan really helped me:
“The surface of the Earth is the shore of the cosmic ocean. On this shore, we've learned most of what we know. Recently, we've waded a little way out, maybe ankle-deep, and the water seems inviting. Some part of our being knows this is where we came from. We long to return, and we can, because the cosmos is also within us. We're made of star stuff. We are a way for the cosmos to know itself.”
Sending you loads of good wishes,
From all at BLT
Keeping everything crossed this end for a happy new beginning for you xx
A little bit of advice 
The War of the Ted Socks
From the depths of despair, there is hope
End of the line 
The happy end of a long road 😊
