Doe anyone have any tips for what to say to my husband before his bypass surgery, hopefully next week? He is very emotional and scared as the surgery is risky and outcome unknown. I’m terrified but want to be there for him and don’t want to say the wrong thing.
Thank you ♥️❤️🩹🙏
Dear You,
So the time has come, he has his appointment for the bypass and of course the pair of you will be worried.
You have to realise that he { sorry we don't know his name } would not be put forward for the operation if his Cardiologist did not think that it would do him good.
His EF is only at 20% at the moment so any help is good, after the operation his heart will be functioning the best they can make it and certainly will be working better than when he was diagnosed.
Its not a walk in the park, but it is incredible just what they can do, all surgery has risks and it is up to you both to decide if that risk is worth it, it was without doubt worth it for me as it allows me to write this reply to you, without it I would not be here to do so.
What do you say to him? just be honest with each other, make him talk about his fears and also you have to as well, don't hide anything from each other { you should be able to tell if you are by now } and tell him exactly what he is to you.
The months ahead will be hard for you both, that's where we can help, ask the questions and you will have a multitude of answers to help the pair of you grow into your new lives.
This is a beginning and a tremendous one at that.
Take care of each other.
it is a really stressful and worrying time. However your husband will be looked after so well. If the medics are concerned at any point they will be on it straight away. No waiting around. My husband was so well looked after and I’m sure everything will go to plan. Take care x
Hello 
For me I just wanted to be told everything was going to be alright to be reassured and my Husband kept doing that as well as telling me I could do this and trust the Surgeon
He said nothing fancy but just reassurance which worked for me
I wish your Husband well with his surgery and I hope you will let us know how he gets on and we are here if you need to talk x
My husband had OHS in Jan 18 and it was a scary time for both of us so I have an understanding of how you're feeling. My husband was so anxious he was losing weight rapidly. But he/we came out the other side, each in our own ways. I’d suggest keeping what you say simple. How about “I love you and we’ll get through this together”.
Best wishes to both of you and your loved ones.
Very wise words from Shar above. If it was me going into surgery that would be what I would want to hear.
❤ and🙏 for you both for peace of mind, a successful operation and recovery.
Remind him you love him. He is in good hands. All of us on this forum are thinking of you both.
Hi SJ. When I went in for my bypass I just wanted to give my wife a cuddle and tell her how much I loved her and our kids before I went for surgery. I was worried about her so I wanted to know that she was going to be OK while I was in surgery so it might help to tell him what your going to be doing or where yout going to be, it helped for me.
All my best wishes to you both and I hope his surgery goes well.
Hi Sj,
In the days leading up to his bypass my partner didn’t really want to talk about it and we just tried to keep things as “normal” as possible (I went to work up until the day before he was admitted etc.)
On the day, I spent a couple of hours with my partner whilst he was waiting to go down to theatre (the hospital kindly let me in at 6a.m!)
We just generally chatted to be honest (as I think we’d both said everything we wanted too the day before.) And like Judge says above he knew my plans, where I was staying etc and that I would be “ok” whilst he was in surgery and afterwards as that was very important to him. I also promised that i would see him as soon as possible after the surgery.
After he had his premed he was completely out of it (in a good way as no longer anxious) and as they wheeled him off to theatre I told him I loved him and he was singing the theme tune to mission impossible!
I did have a few tears once he was out of sight, but went off to get a cup of tea and wait for the surgeons call.
Ultimately you will know your husband best and want he will need from you, I just tried to be really strong and calm and I think that did help my partner.
Good luck to you both x
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