Hi everyone

[piousuk]

Hi everyone

Im new here and looking to chat with other folks in similar situation to myself. Ive struggled with depression and anxiety since a second bout of heart attacks and stent surgery in May 2019. I was diagnosed with enlarged aortic artery in Oct 2019 and had a mini breakdown / alcohol abuse. Im now coming to terms with the impact its had on me mentally and how ive withdrawn from any social activity and my weight / physical health has become worse. Im hoping chatting with others will help get me motivated and accepting the reality of my situation.

[pauljameshome]

Hi piousuk,

I suspect quite a few of us who have experienced anxiety and low mood due to health issues. Why not go and see the doc and get some support? They may refer you to an organisation called iTalk to provide a level of counselling. I have used them when I had low mood and found them to be really helpful. They focus on CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) which helps put you in control to help deal with anxiety and depression. Sessions can be over the phone or on a face to face basis - italk.org.uk

I hope this helps. There is loads of support out there so stay positive 🙂

[piousuk in reply to pauljameshome]

Hi thanks for the advice. Im currently on waiting list with docs for counselling etc so hoping chatting with others in similar situation will help me focus on getting better and healthier.

[pauljameshome in reply to piousuk]

Nice one. If you’re fed up with waiting for a doctor referral you can self refer through the iTalk website. ITalk may also have a waitlist but at least you may feel you might be moving forward

[cowparsley]

I`m so sorry you`ve had such a bad time and I know it`s very easy to turn to the bottle when things seem hopeless.I hope you`ve managed to control the drinking,I drink but within the guide lines.Have you been prescribed anti depressants,they do help and they`re not like the old ones that turned you into a zombie!I hope the wait for counselling is not too long as it sounds like you really need to talk it out with a professional.Do you live on your own? I do and it`s very easy to slip into the habit of not socialising when you`re down so do try and get out.I know it`s old hat but exercise is the best antidote to depression.I don`t mean the gym,just a daily walk will help mentally and physically.Please keep trying,you will come through it like so many on this forum who have overcome even bigger health problems.I wish you all the very best and if you`d like to chat privately just pm me and I`ll always answer.Keep trying xx

[Bonnie20]

I can't add anymore advice than the previous posters, but I can emphathise with you having suffered with depression and anxiety since 2005 and a breakdown in 2008. It's not easy, especially if you live alone, and it's more difficult for a woman I think to go out and socialise. Are there any clubs in your town/village that you could join, like craft clubs, etc. There are a couple in my village, but sadly I don't go as I'm painfully shy when I first meet people face to face and the thought of going into a room full of strangers puts the fear of God into me. So it's not a case of do as I do, more do as I say with this post I'm afraid. But at least you'll know you're not alone and there's lots of us out there! x

[piousuk in reply to Bonnie20]

Im kind of in a similar boat when it comes to shyness etc and a past history of breakdowns and victim of abuse. Ive felt better since posting on here and hoping to change my mindset and start going for walks initially a few times a week then see how things go.

thank you again for your response

[Thecyclist]

Hi, and well done for speaking up, talking is 100% the best way of dealing with these things bottling them up is not the way forward.

The first thing I would say (and I am speaking from lot's of experience) is you can't dwell on what has happened (for better or worse), it has happened and you now have to live with this, these are facts.

The great thing about facts are we can deal with them and rationalise them. In terms of your diagnosis and HA, as you know, and many here will testify, with current medical advances and medication there is EVERY possibility you will continue to lead a normal physical life, and live to a ripe old age and enjoy all the wonderful things this brings and thanks to our wonderful NHS it won't cost you a penny! Ask anyone else is the world and they would give anything to have our NHS! How lucky are we to live here!!!

There are examples on this board of many who have continued doing many things they thought were not possible only to find out they are. One post this week was someone post HA going Scuba diving. So you can do anything! You really are in great position as you can now can do something about all these things, many didn't find out until it was too late.

One thing we cannot know about though is tomorrow, we don't possess time machine's and have not managed to conquer quantum physics just yet, so tomorrow is tomorrow, we simply don't know what it will bring, we can speculate and we can guess, usually quite accurately, but no body knows. So why worry about tomorrow?

But we do have today, and this is why everyone should do as much as they can do enjoy the moment, enjoy today, it is all we have, and it's the same for everyone and offers endless possibilities.

My point being, there is no point in worrying about the past, it's gone, done, over. There is no point in worrying about tomorrow, we don't know what it will bring, why worry about something we don't yet know? However we have today! Let's live it!

If you get the chance have a look into NLP, it helped me massively. I was very similar, drinking too much, and worrying about everything and I mean everything, until I "woke up" realised what I had and what was possible (anything!) and changed my mind set. It was a revelation!

Good luck!

[piousuk in reply to Thecyclist]

Thank you, fantastic response and you are absolutely right. I did look into NLP as id had regular counselling in the past for other problems. Small steps and targets each day is what I am thinking and as you say resist looking back.

thanks again

[Thecyclist in reply to piousuk]

No problem, feel free to message me if you want the name of my NLP coach, she is an ex GP and one of the best in the UK and knows the physical side as well, she is amazing. I did the practitioners course last year and am now looking into coaching others as well. It really does help you change your behaviours and realise it really is all mindset, and how you can stop all the negative chatter in your head. I even managed to stop the alcohol which definitely wasn't helping me. I gave up waiting for CBT, the wait list is nearly a year where I am.

[Andyman]

A lot of us suffer anxiety after our heart attacks. In my case I asked my Gp for professional help and had councelling. I saw a lady for a hour at s time band just poured everything i had built up inside out. 8 sessions later I was much better and less anxious and she recommended that I seek out a course on Mindfulness where I have learned how to cope with it and situations that arise. So much better now and so thankful that I did it. The hardest part was going and asking for help.

[hillofbeans]

Hi piousuk - am in similar situation. I had heart attack in Jan 17 when they found aneurism and aortic arch repair for aneurism in Dec 18 followed by anaemia for sev months - better now thought. However, I really lost confidence after the heart issues. have gradually got worse on the social front. Do not want to go out unless I have to.. Lost all my confidence. Hard to cope with. When the weather gets better I hope to walk perhaps - but just going out of house is hard. Financially struggling now which adds to the problem I suspect. Ho hum - will get there - and hope you will continue to feel better.

[piousuk in reply to hillofbeans]

Hi

Sounds very familiar but hopefully with spring around the corner set some simple targets and rewards like I am at the moment and don't put to much pressure on yourself.