Focus on the heart!: My OH has just... - British Heart Fou...

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Focus on the heart!

Love100cats profile image
17 Replies

My OH has just spent a week in hospital after 4 falls last wed after. I must really feeling overwhelmed to put it mildly. A lovely doctor knelt beside me on Monday and said " don't worry about the cancer, diabetes and dementia, there's no point in knowing more about them because it's his heart we are worried about". So he told me to go home and keep him safe and make him comfortable. I had lost the plot! I have learned not to get sidetracked! I need to look after his ❤️. I feel so relieved because I've been doing that for 31 years! I can manage a few months more. I hope this helps anyone else feeling overwhelmed with complex health issues to care for.

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Love100cats profile image
Love100cats
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17 Replies
Healthyheart1 profile image
Healthyheart1

My heart goes out to you Love100cats. Sending my love to you. No wonder you feel overwhelmed, very condescending words from the doctor, he must have thought you didn't know anything about your oh after all these years . Sending big hugs.😘 Sheena x

cowparsley profile image
cowparsley

I am also overwhelmed and humbled by what you and others on this site have coped with so bravely over the years.You must be a very wonderful woman.God Bless xxx

Lezzers profile image
Lezzers

Again you have my admiration with the care & love you have given your husband, after 31 years you probably know more than the Dr on how to look after him. I hope you're still receiving support and remembering to also look after yourself. Best wishes Lesley x

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply toLezzers

Something else I learned is that others can look after him. I need to share the load outside the family circle so am organizing that starting with a sitter once a week!

Lezzers profile image
Lezzers in reply toLove100cats

I'm so glad you're doing that, my mum did that with my dad & it made such a difference for her.

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply toLezzers

Thank you for your ✓ likes too. It's strange that the best kind of support comes from strangers at a time like this. I have two wonderful sons and daughters in law but they feel the pain and need to grieve too.

Bagrat profile image
Bagrat

Oh bless you. Life is such a challenge and you have coped with huge ones for years. I don't know where the strength comes from. Sometimes it just takes a few words to help. Thinking of you.

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply toBagrat

Thankyou so much.

Rose54 profile image
Rose54

Sending you a big hug

and lots of love

Dickyticker26 profile image
Dickyticker26

"Faith is more than what one sees, Hope survives the worst disease and Charity is more than these" H D C Pepler

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply toDickyticker26

And faith is the assured expectation of things hoped for - apostle Paul. So it plays a big part in my life. It keeps me going. Thank you.

ling profile image
ling

Thank you for the reminder to focus on what's important. We are apt to forget when there are so many moving pieces to juggle : (

If the resources are available for more outside help, use it now. That's the only way to keep him safe. It is humanly impossible for u to watch him 24/7.

Best wishes.

judes profile image
judes

Sending cyber hugs and love, you’re amazing

J

Milkfairy profile image
MilkfairyHeart Star

Love trumps all.

Sending my best wishes and I am am humbled by your devotion to your husband.

Sillyfroggy profile image
Sillyfroggy

God bless you both x

Prada47 profile image
Prada47

Hi Love 100 cats

Reading your post it's difficult to comment.

But and as always there is a But

I though the Dr was giving sound advice !!! We all sometimes get overwhelmed with situations facing us and it's nice to hear a Dr kneeling down to offer some advice. Condescending I don't know ? only you can know that, we can only read a small part of the conversation.

One thing I do know if I was looking for someone to care for me, you would be high on my list of people I would want.

Take Care and Wishing you and your OH Well

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply toPrada47

I'm pleased you responded. I was so encouraged by that doctor. I still feel tearful when I think of how thoughtful he was. He spoke very quietly so my husband didn't hear. I didn't want to give a bad impression but sometimes it's hard to put feelings into few words. I only know that prior to that day I was struggling seriously. After I came home with half the load. He wasn't a cardiac doctor so was talking from the background of care for the elderly with multiple issues.x

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