Re: - DRUG and ALCOHOL ABUSE

I would personally like to make a statement regarding an issue that came up last week between myself and Lezzers and others regarding a post from Bunting97. I found the whole issue very distressing and one I would not wish to repeat. However, when attributing “blame” for issues, one must first look to oneself to make sure the blame does not lie closer to home that one might feel comfortable with.

That said, most answers can be found with a little research and a good deal of listening. Having taken that approach I conclude the following: _

I was actually the first person to answer Bunting97 and began with “I personally think you need to take a reality check of your lifestyle” and recommended that the poster should seek immediate help from their family doctor. There was some ambiguity within the post whether the person had suffered a heart attack which was actually a suggestion from their friend – since the poster left hospital after a check up without any advice regarding heart matters and no medication for such a medical condition, I concluded the symptoms they had felt were more to do with mixing alcohol and cocaine than anything else. I was therefore happy with the advice I gave.

That post attracted a huge response of 14 likes from (I assume) like minded people that thought the advice was appropriate based upon the content of the post.

What followed was what I can only describe as a tirade of allegations, accusations and recriminations from one member in particular and from others who supported their views. I could not, to this very day, justify the abuse that was thrown at me; all for what I believed was my very first post. During this personal attack, some posters even went on to say that the first part of the posts and comments given, were friendly and supportive with relevant help and support. But still the abuse kept coming.

However, it transpires (this is the research) that the post from Bunting97 received more posts later that day, some from a source that was not supportive and made accusations that were profoundly cruel and unnecessary. So much so that the Administration took down the original and subsequent posts to quell the rising anger and disappointment which was mistakenly aimed at me.

That singe action raised another issue for no one could go back and actually see the offending posts and make a sane judgement as to blame and there followed a post from Chris-BHF an Administrator, outlining conduct within the group and that the posts had been taken down.

Since then I have felt that I have been attacked, my personality judged and my “worth” within the group put into question – all because of a post that some people thought that I was the author of.

I would just like to go on the record by saying that I would never be abusive or disrespectful to anyone here purely because no one knows just what baggage any of us are carrying and as far as I am concerned, had NOTHING to do with any abusive posts aimed at Bunting97 and that subsequent allegations aimed at me are profoundly mistaken and have no idea why anyone should attack me in such a manner.

[Gundoglady]

Sorry to read this X

I didn't see or read any of the original post, so have no idea who said what or to whom.

But I did gather that feelings were running high!

[Clarky61012]

I didn't see the posts but do feel for you, social media can be very stressful at times and people can feel under threat and misinterpreted. You know you had positive intentions, that's the main thing Take care

[Prada47]

Hello Ticking

Forums are full of " lower Deck Lawyers " with varying opinions on the Rights and Wrongs. of many issues. I didn't see the post that personally cast doubts on your input to this thread, but I must say I value your inputs to many issues on this forum, so don't take the huff and disappear. I think it would be appropriate to just say like you, sometimes I get Threaders and wonder should I reply to certain issues.

One thing I learnt quite quickly when I worked for a very large company " If you ask anyone for an Opinion your sure as hell are going to get one whether you like it or not " One thing I do recognise is "Once Navy Always Navy "

Best Regards

[Fortepiano]

Dear ticking - ticker

Unfortunately when there is a long thread people who answered early on can think erroneously that subsequent replies are aimed at them, when this is not the case.

There were over 70 posts in that thread when I reported the thread to the administration as having got out of control. Your own ( perfectly acceptable) post was long forgotten by everyone, and the thread had long moved on, though not in a good direction!

The subsequent discussion of issues raised in the previous thread was entirely general and did not even mention you and your long -forgotten post! Everyone was aware the problems were with the later part of the Bunting thread.

There were 32 posts in the discussion thread before you joined it, all of which were perfectly civil and not a single one made any reference to you or your post. Despite this, you decided - entirely mistakenly and unfortunately !- that the discussion was aimed at you and joined the thread with a post which unfortunately included a personal, named, attack on Lezzers. It was that personal named attack which not surprisingly did not go down well, and led to your post being reported, nothing to do with the original thread.

I would urge anyone who wants to respond to a thread to read the entire thread and think first! It's not necessarily about you!

Can we all draw a line under this now please?. The second discussion was locked for good reasons. There are no groups and factions on this forum, and I'm sure the last thing we all want is for it to turn into a typical internet forum.

I'm now off for a week in the land with no broadband, otherwise known as rural Wales. I really hope when I nervously open healthunlocked when I return everything will have calmed down!

All the best to EVERYONE!

[Hidden in reply to Fortepiano]

Thank you (and the other replies) for the advice and explanation re additional posts. The reason for my statement was to inform others that I was not the one to blame for the abusive posts. My recollection of this sad story do not match yours however, since I had posted regarding my only post to the person involved and how a member can begin by asking for opinions that turn out to be a pole for derogatory thoughts against me. Yes I did mention the offender by name because the attack was totally unwarranted and because of their attitude it brought others into the fray purely because they had been misled in the first place by the implication that I was the abusive one. That is the truth of the matter and why I posted this and why I will be moving on from this issue. "nemo me impune lacessit"

[MichelleLed]

There are always people out there that are only too pleased to send hateful remarks out. If you have a disagreement there is absolutely no reason to be rude or offensive. The people that make these remarks should be removed!