Keep the humour going please! - British Heart Fou...

British Heart Foundation

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Keep the humour going please!

Love100cats profile image
17 Replies

I'm having such a difficult time with my h.f. and my husband's serious deteriorating heart condition. I do appreciate all the serious support and advice I get from this site. But what gets me through the day are the pictures and witty comments. They keep me from feeling overly sad 😢 so please let's continue with both. I do believe that laughter is a very good medicine. You all have so much to give unselfishly and you may never know how many have been helped but serious posts or funny ones.xx

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Love100cats profile image
Love100cats
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17 Replies
Lezzers profile image
Lezzers

I'm completely in agreement with you, laughter is the best medicine ever. My husband has HF with other issues & we have developed a somewhat dark sense of humor but if we didn't laugh we would be feeling completely overwhelmed with everything. Best wishes you to & your husband. Have you heard of the Pumping Marvellous website & Facebook group, amazing group for support & understanding & no acrimonious posts either! Xx

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply to Lezzers

I have read a lot on Pumpingmarvelous and especially valued the wolf story but I have had to cancel my Facebook temporary because I was inundated with stuff I couldn't deal with but I will try again and get some advice on how to control what I get. Thankyou

Nicky3 profile image
Nicky3

Hi

Interesting name do you have 100 cats or just want to have them?😺

I agree about the dark sense of humour definitely developed that one since HA. Other people don’t always get it but I have met a good friend at Cardiac Rehab we have a different banter. I’m taking her to hospital today for an op, we do keep each spirits up on all these numerous visits.

I think if I didn’t have her I would probably look for a heart support group to speak to other people who “get it”. Laughter is the best she took me to the cinema the day before my op 2 weeks ago to watch instant family which was funny. It can be so hard to have a long term condition as many friends fall away when you can’t do things like you used to. I think others cannot see your heart like they would if you limped so find it difficult to empathise long term.

My husband and I have Now TV, Netflix and Amazon and hardly watch normal TV we usually watch comedies more uplifting. If I can get out of bed and walk (one point I couldn’t), it’s a good day and I try to make the best of it as who knows about tomorrow? I hope you are both having a good day today and wish you all the best.

Heart patients do not have enough long term support I think a lot of us feel lonely with this condition we need more support like cancer patients have.

Milkfairy profile image
MilkfairyHeart Star in reply to Nicky3

I agree with your comment Nicky that heart patients need more support.

My husband and I have also developed a gallows sense of humour too. We both live with heart conditions. Better tears of laughter than sorrow.

When I am stuck on my bed enforced to rest I listen to comedy podcasts.

I enjoy comedy on the TV ...loved the return of Alan Partridge this week.

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply to Nicky3

I just have to comment on your post. Your point about being chronically sick really hit home. After admission to H I had so many cooked meals arriving I could cope now I don't even get visitors. They are very good at get well soon cards but not at permanent conditions. So it's a bit lonely. Today is a good day because nobody comes and we can put t.v. on and fall asleep in our chairs😒. The cats is in memory of my mum who died of heart failure 2 years ago age 96 and it was a boxed set of cards she gave me just before when she couldn't write very well. Thank you for your lovely comments. Have a good day too!

Fortepiano profile image
Fortepiano

I am so sorry you are struggling. It's particularly difficult that you are both unwell and caring for your husband. I absolutely agree about humour - when my husband was at his worst we used to watch Jeeves and Wooster together, and to laugh helped us so much.

I also found it helpful to look for 3 ( or even 1!) good things in the day. These were generally very small - a robin, or a new flower in the garden, but it helped similarly to notice and think about something external. Heart failure is so hard it can become all- consuming.

Are you still managing to walk a bit? Getting out of the house when possible helps.

All the best to you both

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats in reply to Fortepiano

Thankyou. I'm just starting to get out maybe once a week but just locally. I had a shock when the h.f. nurse told me I lacked oxygen and had to get out so each day I walk to the gate and back. Problem is elderly people stop and ask if I'm ok so I must be pale😗 I too have a positive frame of mind and am grateful for a quiet home, a beautiful garden, comfort etc. Support is what I need and I'm getting it daily via these posts.x

Ianc2 profile image
Ianc2

I am an elderly person. I am constantly on the look out for people who look worse than I am. If I can talk to them and they fall down before I do it cheers me up no end.

HHH2017 profile image
HHH2017 in reply to Ianc2

Wicked 😂 love it!

Nicky3 profile image
Nicky3

Lanc 2 that made me laugh...

Must say I was terribly cheerful taking my friend to the hospital for an OP today. I couldn't get over that for once it wasn't me getting operated on. Did feel guilty!!! But so happy ..naughty! Well I get to pick her up and be her nurse for a few days that'll teach me!! I feel a nurse Cratchet coming on lol.😷🤯

Milkfairy profile image
MilkfairyHeart Star in reply to Nicky3

Nicky I have to tell you I loved your phrase about finding a good Cardiologist

' you have to kiss a few toads to find a prince'

Funny thing is when I bumped into my Cardiologist this week and he greeted me with a kiss I didn't turn into a princess.

Nicky3 profile image
Nicky3 in reply to Milkfairy

Very funny milk fairy met a Dr once that looked like a toad hate to think if he kissed me what would happen!

Lezzers profile image
Lezzers

See my husband is weird!!! His favourite programmes are people buying homes/holiday homes abroad & cooking programmes!! He passes out on planes & he can't eat anything they cook on this program!! !! That would be just torture to me!!!

This one is just for you Love100cats: -

I have some terrible news, my younger brother was ferreting about under the sink and found a pop bottle (with a 6d deposit) with what he thought was fizzy pop inside. Unfortunately for him it was actually a very expensive yacht varnish. After drinking it, he became ill and was rushed to hospital but even with all of the ER efforts, he sadly died. A hospital spokesman later said that it was an unfortunate accident and although he had a terrible end he had a superb finish!

Love100cats profile image
Love100cats

I've never had a joke posted just for me! Thank you. Especially as I lost my husband 2 weeks ago. We had the funeral on Monday and highlighted how his fight for life and determination kept him going 32 years. I miss him but I'm not grieving as the dementia took him away from me months ago. He died in his own bed at home with those closest to him with him. It was painless and tranquil. A new chapter in my life starts at 78 and the first thing I need to do is work out how much this dicky ticker of mine will let me do!

Dark Humour is my saviour in times of dispair or disbelief - as it is for my wife to.

Actually, dark humour is there for us at all times because it helps us survive the stresses imposed upon people by current day living requirements (target driven aspirations etc).

Not everyone gets it though.

During a conversation with our Cardio NP, she mentioned she would check with the 'Cardiologist of the Week'. I had just seen the Billy Connolly sketch about 'Potatoes of the Night' - ridiculously simple but so ironically true and funny.

So, it became even more appropriate (to me) when the following week I found myself admitted to the Cario Ward via A&E and had to have a blood test early in the morning.

I'd actually managed to get some sleep (Really!) and was woken by this lady advising she was here to take a blood sample for testing.

"I take it you are the Vampire of the NIght then?" I said with the afore said Potatoes sketch and Cardio comment as a means of breaking the ice.

"No" came the reply... "I'm a highly qualified technician who does not work in pathology"

Things went down hill from there between us, as you can imagine!

How nice it would be to recount the take to an 'on fire' Billy Connolly - just ot watch him laugh himself stupid at the absurdity of it.

I wish you both all the best and hope that humiour does its job of keeping you well and alive.

No, though I do watch it on YouTube occasionally. His observations are just so insightful and spot on. Though he is not alone by a country mile - just that he has so much material on Youtube available to watch from such a long career.

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