do you continue to carry on as 'normal' whatever that may be.
Life naturally changes after a close loss but I tend to stick with what was rather than what is, how about you?
Chloe
Does your routine change over the wee... - Bereavement Care ...
Does your routine change over the weekend or...
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chloe40
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Its changed entirely for me. Sunday was a family day. When the children were young we’d do some sort of activity in the morning normally football swimming or just to the park after a cooked breakfast. Then it would be a roast. Afternoons were board games & then tv. Saturdays were mainly me being a taxi driver & standing in the cold watching football. Or boiling hot in a stuffy leisure centre watching my daughter in a swimming gala. When they were in their teens it still was very much family. More often than not we’d meet up with friends at the pub then back to mine for a bbq. Where we played games. Football rounders etc…everyone joined in. Happy days.
Now it’s so quiet. I must admit I hate weekends now. I prefer weekdays where I’m busy & there’s structure. To invite people round now, I just can’t be bothered. It now seems to me to be such hard work whereas before I absolutely loved it.
I must agree Caza I hate weekends and Bank holidays too!
It's understandable that we're busier when the children were younger too. I have tried to continue Sunday roast as that at least makes it bearable, but it's never the same.
You're right, it's the quietness that gets me, not a soul to be seen ugh, roll on Monday.
x
Husband still likes a roast on a Sunday 🙄I cheat get ready made cauli cheese prepared veg frozen Yorkshire puds. In the summer I normally get away without doing a roast. But where’s summer! I think if it was just me I’d rule Sundays & bank hols out 😤
Do you know Caza for the first time ever, I've done exactly the same.
I swore I'd never buy ready made Yorkshire puds, but I did last month and cauli cheese too and thought, blow that I won't bother making them again 😀
x
Tomorrow we decided to spoil ourselves and have a roast dinner in the pub and have booked a table for one!
I love being invited out to places even if I can't always make it as it's nice to be asked out!
Yesterday out at the festival was a laugh when my mates dog started whining and barking at a talk in Welsh and she had to take the dog out of the tent like you would a small child!
We were right to take our own packed lunches as there it was £12.50 for a burger!
What I do most weekends is put things in to look forward to!
Great you had a good time and enjoy your roast dinner x
At the pub where we went for our roast dinner yesterday we really enjoyed eating it sat outside in the beer garden!
Then I went to the bar to get some more drinks and there was a woman there who got really cross when she got told no she wasn't having a table in the restaurant and wouldn't take no for an answer!
I then suggested joining us outside in the beer garden as I had really enjoyed my roast outside but she didn't want to sit outside and have roast dinner in the beer garden and that was that and I said how I have had many experiences when I had thought I was getting things and at the last minute no I wasn't and how I had become infuriated as well and how one Sunday we had hoped to go for a roast only to have on the door bookings only and I had become extremely infuriated as well and had walked past and gone somewhere else for lunch!
Years ago my father had become extremely infuriated one Saturday night when he had wanted to have gone to an Italian restaurant only to be asked had he booked and no he hadn't and what he did was went for fish and chips and said the have you booked thing was ridiculous and we all sat outside the place and had our takeouts anyway!
I had said when I had seen that bookings only thing on the door about taking our own homemade roast dinners and eating them by their doors in protest!
It's amazing how seemingly small things like that can really wind you up!
Usually I do something different on a weekend as today I am off to a Welsh language festival in the city centre which I am looking forward to as last time I went was back in 2019 just before covid came along!
Good news as I was successful yesterday at a phone assessment for legal and general and they have invited me to an assessment day on 29 July which I said yes to as there's nothing to lose by trying!
Thursday just gone I went for an interview and arrived early and saw a snack bar and got a cup of tea from there and sat down and then got stopped by aggressive security who wanted to ask me questions and I asked for the reason for it and a row erupted as I wasn't sitting there being victimised when I had done nothing wrong and other members of staff came out to see what the fuss was over and were very kind to me saying there was no need for it when I had done nothing wrong!
Then it was interview time and I refused to do it and said after that performance earlier on I was no longer interested in their job so there was no point wasting my time or theirs and walked away with my head held high and had my planned picnic in the town centre anyway and then their hr rep rang me to put me down and laughed at me down the phone and I swore at her and slammed the phone down in disgust and burst into tears in the middle of Newport wondering if it's best to save myself the upset and not bother in going out and doing things but thankfully thought better of it and decided to come out this morning anyway and take my time!
The people in Newport were very kind to me when I burst into tears after I got put down and said how that said it all about that company and having a go at someone just sitting down minding their own business was ridiculous and yes it is and I was right to have sworn at them!
Today I have made up a packed lunch for the festival as those places like to rip people off and it's sunny out so why not?
Good news as I have some interviews next week as well so we will see how I go on but what's definite is I'm not going back to that company that treated me badly on Thursday for a job and I had said to the paid members of staff there how that had been a lesson to me not to go near that employer again when that happened!
I have calmed down now and yes I do feel that was ridiculous to have a go at someone for no reason as they did just for sitting on a chair!
Up until then I had never heard of anything so ridiculous and I'm glad they did that and showed their true face before it was too late!
Next Saturday it's the Newport splash festival which I am looking forward to!
I'm not letting an incident like last Thursday and stupid people like then ruin my confidence and put me off!
chloe40Administrator
Sounds like another great weekend for you Turnipgirl
Really pleased you have an interview coming up the end of the month x
Oh my goodness, that's an awful upset for you, especially when you're trying so hard to find a job. It's there loss but you didn't deserve that.
Glad there is some kindness in Newport thankfully.
The festival sounds exciting, so have a lovely day.
x
Weekends were always family times,they've changed alot. I hate change.I can't lie in bed so am up really early.
chloe40Administrator
Hi Sandradsn
Oh me too, what is it with us?
And I'm up earlier and earlier!
x
I have to admit that although I’m awake early 6.30ish. I lay in bed with a pot of coffee (don’t let on to my gp or dentist 🙄) a biscuit & a good book. If cold with the electric blanket on until 9ish 😱. Husband walks the dog, what is there to get up for 🤷♀️
I'm a morning person ,sometimes when weather is good,I sit in the garden as the sun comes up with a cuppa.
That’s lovely Sandradsn
I love the early sunrise especially when it’s going to be a sunny day,
Really relaxing way to start the day and good meditation too x
Just had another happy memory. My mother in law, bless her 🙄. After my father in law died would come to us on a Sunday. She was a strong catholic & frowned upon anyone who drank apart from her sons. Women were definitely looked down upon. Every time she came to us she’d say I wouldn’t mind one of your lovely coffees from the fridge. Baileys. After three she was taken home more than happy. I wouldn’t of dare to have ready made anything then 😬
I find the weekdays can get extremely busy and stressful myself so put in little things to look forward to during the week as it's no fun getting stressed out and uptight over things!
I enjoyed the festival yesterday and I'm looking forward to going out next Saturday to the Newport Splash one!
chloe40Administrator
Yes, your weekdays are very full Turnipgirl so anything that helps get you through, are probably very welcome.
As a retired person I often forget what day it is, so yes, I guess all days are alike now, When I was working as a nurse, I took different days off each week as per the Schedule, so I've never really got into the 'Hooray It's The Weekend!' vibe, although I did make the most of my days off!
Cheers, Midori
It's nice to have days off in the week I find!
I have had grief for having dared to go out on days out on weekdays and had the I thought you were working lecture!
At the scabby care home when I complained about being treated badly I ended up getting fobbed off with an excuse that this had happened because it was Monday!
It's the scummy people who do this and their attitudes is what it is that upsets me!
Wednesday and Friday coming will be days out I have decided however job applications will be done first as always as they are the priority and my interviews tomorrow and Tuesday!
I'm glad to be seeing the jobcentre fortnightly as I found it intrusive every week!
I enjoyed the splash festival yesterday and a nice relaxing roast dinner at the pub this lunchtime and had a nice salad for dinner tonight using up the salad stuff in the fridge!
My whole life blew up and I was simply unable to return to pre-death routines. It's been 4 years and I'm still struggling to figure out what my new reality is supposed to feel like.
Holidays are the worst. I prefer to just stay home in bed!
Welcome NeuroSeeker
Really sorry life is so difficult right now.
I understand times like holidays are worse, so many memories to flood our minds.
I'm hoping you have some friends and maybe family to support you and help you to at least get outside for short periods, otherwise it's awfully hard to be alone.
Please keep in touch, we are a really friendly forum and there is always someone around to answer your posts.
x
I’m with u Chloe - worst thing u can do is enter the ‘what ifs’. Trying now to see positivity- hard but looking at anything worse : like I could of been at odds with him at the time of his death ! My daughter is over fr Canada - she’s been super - - as have u all on this site ! Ur administration staff did the right thing at the right time/ watching the olympics which has been a comfort as I can’t concentrate on my kindle - sorry for rambling
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