Hi all, I went for a Sterilisation appointment just over a week ago, I don't have any children but have 2 stepchildren and a grandson and really don't want to have children of my own as I am now 37 and have never been a maternal person. I went to the hospital and sat for around 20mins while the female Doctor talked at me not to me for 20mins telling me how I was making a mistake, it's every woman's duty to have a child etc etc. Anyway I am allergic to nickel and so cannot have essure fitted to block my tubes but my mum is the same so had plastic clips used around 30yrs ago and has had no problems. When I asked about this after being belittled for so long I was told that hospital no longer used plastic clips only metal ones the same as essure so there was nothing they could do for me! Go home and talk my husband into having a vasectomy! Is anyone aware of how I can find out I'd any hospitals are still using the plastic clips?? I'm annoyed about the situation and a little stuck at the moment.
Thanks in advance xx
Written by
Lisao78
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
I cant believe you would be treated this way by a health care professional she has no right to talk to you like that, id put in a complaint yes i can understand them asking questions because they wouldn't want you to regret being sterilised however its none of her business and i cant believe she'd suggest your husband to have a vasectomy when they should be able to help you with what you went for. Id suggest seeing a different doctor/nurse for a second opinion. Hope you manage to sort something out x
I'm sorry that I cannot help with your question; but as a 37 yr old with many failed pregnancies and a SIDS death on her hands, I am following your thread with interest.
I will never ask my partner to get a vasectomy. (What if something happened to me and he remarried?) I know, though I cannot carry babs successfully, so sterilisation is the best I think.
The suggestions you were given were well out of order. No one should presume birth is a given thing.
Have you actually done research into getting sterilised? maybe she knows what she's talking about, Google ptls it is very real, and think very carefully before you go ahead with any method of sterilisation x
Hang on! I don't believe anyone as much in the know about this would have not done the research. As she has said, she knows the subject and without doubt the medical proffessional involved was speaking well out of turn!
Easy monster!!!! I was simply asking if she'd researched that is all, I didn't when I got sterilised and I wish I had a doctor that told me to think some more about it instead. I know of many others that didn't do the research either, there are a few groups on facebook that are suffering the terrible consequences of sterilisation the list of side affects is endless maybe the original poster would like to join these groups to get different opinions.... another option would be a completely different method of contraception altogether something that could easily be stopped if there were side effects. and as for falling pregnant it's not foolproof ectopic pregnancy and miscarriage are a side effect one of which I have had the experience of.
I know this is a serious thing and there are many side effects. There comes a point sometimes though, when other types of contraception all seem to be ruled out. I don't think any of us would really have a sterilisation otherwise.
I'm glad there are peops like you who give an alternative view, just as someone to whom this seems the only good option; who has considered the negative impact, and tried other avenues, people often seem very quick to recap on options previously visited.
Still though, thanks for the quick reply. I was reacting not helping. xx
Hi guys, it wasn't her questioning me about why I didn't want children I found inappropriate but the way she went about it. My mum was sterilised around 30yrs ago with plastic clips and has never had an issue which is why after the hassle I've had with the Mirena coil I decided to try and have it arranged....the things the Dr said to me were regarding my stepchildren and them not having my genes and how my grandson wasn't really mine as he doesn't have my genes either....I explained they were still my stepchildren and she responded with...if anything ever happened to your husband they wouldn't be there for you! Then preceeded to go on about how sad it was seeing 70 odd yr old ladies on their own as they chose to have no children and didn't I want someone to look after me when I was old! I told her her reasoning was wrong and as well as me not being maternal I don't have the lifestyle for children either as we run a shop from 10am til 10pm Mon to Fri and sing every weekend! She even went as far as saying...what if I divorced my husband...then I'd have no children and no chance of having any!
As far as asking my husband to have a Vasectomy...she asked how old he is (51) then said well he's had his children so that makes sense and then you don't need an operation ...to which I responded...what if we divorced? I'd be back in the same boat! Do I then ask every man I have a relationship with to have a vasectomy?? She replied with....that's not the issue here!
I'm now back on the pill but starting to get headaches again and feeling lethargic...don't think my body agrees with the hormones and still think I've got remnants of silicone in my system from Mirena coil....I'm going to ask my doctor if they are aware of any hospitals using the plastic clips and see how I get on down that route!
Thats awful to be spoke to like that, I'm surprised she still has a job! There is a group on facebook Post tubal ligation group UK it's a closed group so it's private worth joining and having a read through what some of the ladies go through its awful many end up having a costly reversal or a hysterectomy, sterilisation plays havoc with the hormones headaches, heavy bleeding, weight gain, hairloss, loss of sex drive are just a couple of symptoms I can't stress enough how important it is to understand its not a problem free method of contraception, I hope everything works out for the best x
Blinking cheek. It's up to you. Not for that women to moralise what you want to do. I don't trust her. Ring round to a gynae clinic and ask if they know about the clips. You may be able to find out on line.
hi, first of all i'm sorry you was treated that way that's awful! just because you're female does not mean you have to have children. I'm going in on Friday to be sterilised as i have 4 boys and don't want anymore and was told its with the plastic clips. I'm in Essex so not sure where you live. id definitley do some research into this as it is your human right. good luck
Just an update to let you all know that after trying 3 different hospitals I have finally found a consultant that has offered to help me. Instead of filshie clips or the essure implant they keep offering me that I can have due to allergies.....I saw a consultant on Friday who has offered to remove my fallopian tubes instead! I am so happy that at last somebody within the NHS has actually listened to me and helped me.
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Just diagnosed with herpes
Long Term Urinary/Vaginal Problems.. what should I do next? (Long post but bear with)
Living with genital herpes
