Mid pregnancy wobbles

[Sunshine92]

Hi lovely ladies,

Having a bit of a wobble this evening, and i’m just wondering if you wouldn’t mind sharing your stories.

I’m 28 with a 3 year history of unexplained infertility. I have polycystic ovaries, but not the syndrome. My AMH is therefore high but all my other hormonal tests were normal.

I’m currently 21 weeks pregnant from my second round of IVF. First was a big fat fail with 8 eggs collected after stimming for 11 days, only 3 fertilised, had 1 put back on day 2 that was unsuccessful. Nothing to freeze. This time was much more success with 19 eggs, 12 mature, 9 fertilising and ending up with 6 top quality blasts, one of which is now the wriggly baby growing inside of me!

I just cant shake this feeling that theres a reason i havent gotten pregnant, that reason we still dont know. But im convinced its because there’s something wrong with genetics and my baby is going to be born with a syndrome. Sounds super dramatic i know 😔

I was just wondering if any of you ladies had IVF for unexplained infertility and had healthy babies as a result? Im so used to my body letting me down, its hard to trust it xx

[Hidden]

Hi I had IVF and was classed as unexplained. I have PCOS but ovulated so they said that wasn’t the cause. We had a missed miscarriage the first round and second round resulted in my now 2 year old. I really suffered with anxiety through all the pregnancy thinking that we weren’t actually going to get a baby at the end of it so I totally get how you are feeling but you will get there xx

[Ivf2020A]

Hey sweetie Iv not been where you are but just wanted to say thinking of you and im sending massive positive vibes in your direction x if I do ever get to where you are knowing me I will probably be the same but I would just say that today you are pregnant with your miracle we worry and stress and thats all normal- bt try and enjoy that today at this very moment you and your baby are closer than anyone can ever be.. how magical is that 💓😊 Thinking of you xx

[Kelz2020]

Hey lovely, been a while since I’ve been on the forum. Totally get your anxiety. Mine is unexplained too. Obviously it worked first time for us but regardless of that I think anyone on this journey after ivf will feel the same. Even those who conceive naturally. I’ve got my 20 week scan next Friday and I’m bricking it. My anxiety has gotten better but like you I think ahead to when baby is here and the what ifs. Ultimately we can’t change anything and it’s out of our control so we have to trust the scans, the medics / professionals and the stats - which are tiny numbers compared to births which have no issues or babies born with syndromes & problems. You’re simply trying to control the uncontrollable which is impossible. Blunt but true.

I keep telling myself that this could be, and probably will be, the only chance and shot I get at pregnancy so I need to embrace and enjoy it (even with the Covid circumstances) as much as I can.

Of course, I’m not saying you shouldn’t be anxious because you’ve every right to be and that’s 100000% totally normal for all of us, but I’m saying what will be will be and it WILL be amazing. Trust your body and trust nature & trust god or whoever you believe in. Head up, shoulders back! You’ve got this and ALL WILL BE AND IS FINE! Xxx

[Sunshine92 in reply to Kelz2020]

Thank you for your lovely reply! Some days are better than others anxiety wise. I just cant help but think some bad news is coming after years if it.

I work at a Childrens Hospital where i see loads and loads of babies / children with genetic conditions. I spose that doesnt help either because it seems to common to me when in reality its not xx

[LunaLovegood11]

Hey there. I think given the journey we’ve been on it’s totally natural!

People said to me ‘it’s normal to worry, all mums do’ but then not all mums have been through our process, so they just don’t get it and I’m convinced that people think once you’re pregnant the hangover leaves you (it certainly didn’t leave me). I found it hard to find support for this through pregnancy.

I had my baby on Tuesday and he is all healthy - there are lots more tests he needs of course but so far so good.

We got extra scans as we had IVF but they were more reassuring than anything else.

Keep positive as every day that passes is a good sign, and we aren’t any more likely than anyone else to have issues - we just needed a little help putting sperm to egg 👍🏻

[Sunshine92 in reply to LunaLovegood11]

Ahhh congratulations on your beautiful boy! 💙

I get what you mean about support .. im finding it hard too. Hubby is lovely but he doesnt worry like i do. I just feel so responsible although how my body is growing this human i have little control over!

He hasnt been very wriggly today but was non stop yesterday! He’s probs just asleep and worn out, but my infertility / IVF brain is focused to think the worst 😕 wish i could switch it off.

Thank you for taking the time to reply 🙂 xx

[KayCan]

Hi Sunshine92, only just getting some time to scroll on here today and noticed your post. We had IVF for unexplained infertility, incredibly lucky that it worked first time for us and I now have a 13 week old baby girl.

I felt exactly the same as you did, I just could not get my head around the fact that I had gotten pregnant and I couldn't trust my body, I struggled with coming off the pessaries as I was so sure I'd miscarry and I worried about every little thing. I just kept the faith that would would be would be, I didn't have any of the testing done at the 12 week scan as I knew I'd worry my whole pregnancy if something came back as a high risk. Again, incredibly thankful that she is absolutely thriving and healthy. You have to trust that things will work out just fine, and I truly believe that you honestly will be, try and enjoy this time as you never get it back and you'd wish you had. Take care xx

[Sunshine92 in reply to KayCan]

Thank you so so much for this! ❤️ honestly, hearing from the experiences of people like you does more for me than i think any counsellor ever would. Lived experience is priceless. Its so reassuring to know im not the only one to feel or have felt like this xxx

[Eltel81]

I think it’s totally natural to worry through pregnancy anyway, but when you have had such a journey to get pregnant to worry is increased.

I have a happy, healthy 9 week old baby girl. However, I never thought I would get here. Went through a round of IVF with my own eggs which ended up being unsuccessful, I had unexplained infertility at the time. Then later was told I was perimenapausal so waited for donor eggs for the next round of icsi. Strangely, I fell pregnant natueally in the end, but I still think that I’m so lucky to have baby G that I’m looking for things wrong, like it can’t possibly be happening to me, too good to be true and all that. I guess eventually I will relax and this anxiety will disappear, but it’s just a side effect of the heartache getting to this point.