Need help

[Djemima]

Hi I have a 6yr old Autistic grandson we have started taking him at weekends I'm struggling with calming gom down when he doesn't get his way he bites nips fights I'm not sure what to do

[Vonus5591]

iPad is entertaining and good idea as helps

[Vonus5591 in reply to Vonus5591]

Ask school about

[Djemima in reply to Vonus5591]

Thank you

[Aspen797]

Sometimes making things predictable helps. A visual schedule. It can be the ‘bad guy’ —e.g., first we eat dinner then we get dessert, first we get dressed then we get breakfast, or whatever the thing you have to say no to in the moment. If he knows there is a time to look forward to, it may help.

[Djemima in reply to Aspen797]

The he wouldn't take any of that in I wish he would I don't say No as that makes things worse during all this he's locked on my arm with his teeth its not good thanks for your reply

[Aspen797 in reply to Djemima]

Not sure where you are located but there are some courses that offer great ideas on parenting littles on the spectrum. In the UK you might check out : autism.org.uk/what-we-do/au...

In US, positive parenting classes like Triple P are online and low cost.

I am sorry for your bruises! It gets easier when communication strategies are in place and anxiety is addressed. We found occupational therapy for sensory issues, speech for social thinking/perspective taking (nonverbal may use PECS), and positive parenting/behavior techniques most useful. Predictability helps decrease anxiety which lowers aggression. Lots of warnings before transitions, social stories/picture books to help prepare for new settings or experiences.

[Djemima in reply to Aspen797]

It seems when he doesn't get his own way it all starts

[Aspen797 in reply to Djemima]

That age is challenging. Whether autistic or not. This article offers some good insights and ideas: psy-ed.com/wpblog/how-to-co...

[Djemima in reply to Aspen797]

That was a great help thank you

[Elle1984]

I would say definitely a schedule, with pictures is helpful at that age. Also staying calm yourself can often diffuse the situation a lot quicker. Maybe a social story about having kind hands and kind feet and kind mouth could help with a consequence if he doesn’t follow instructions. My daughter is almost 19 and I still use these tools. Don’t engage with him during outbursts, let him get it out of his system and then when he’s calm again talk to him about how it’s not the right way to react. Bribery I would say as a last resort. E.g if you stop now we can do this or you can have a treat. It’s about finding what works for him. Good Luck

[Djemima in reply to Elle1984]

I'll need to get cards I don't think he's even at that stage yet but I'll definitely try anything that helps I'm black and blue from last weekend thanks 😊

[Bubu6]

Hey hun , my son has Agenisis of the corpus collosum and has outbursts , he's only 4 but what I feel like helps is making the tone of your voice softer , giving him a choice , if it's gonna do him no harm sometimes letting him have what he wants , choosing your battles . When he's calm hugging him and saying it's all right . If I say no , it makes it worse . Just try and be patient, I know it's hard but still . Also get him something that he uses for comfort and try and distract him. Say come on , take your toy let's watch something or let's go to the park etc . If it's really bad just let him cry a little, then slowly approach him and make sure you don't touch him . Go to his level ask him what is wrong then give him a choice . I hope this helps

[Djemima in reply to Bubu6]

Thanks for your reply he's none verbal although he can mimic what you say when he attacks he's so strong for a 6 Yr old trying not to hurt him or yourself is what I'm trying to do

[Bubu6 in reply to Djemima]

Yes they are very strong !

[Djemima in reply to Bubu6]

Lovely hot day amd u have a hoodie on to cover the brusies

[Bubu6]

Also playing good guy , bad guy so if he's not happy with you, then someone else can take the lead and he will probably listen to them .

[Djemima in reply to Bubu6]

Yeah papa seems to be good guy all the time I'm always bad guy

[Bubu6 in reply to Djemima]

😂

[IdkIsdk]

Does he struggle with calming down after being in a noisy /busy environment? These are things than can overstimulate. Minimising the crowds or using ear defenders and fidget toys might help to stop the complete meltdowns. Sorry if this is obvious for you. You can search for too much information NAS if you do want to know more about this.

[Djemima in reply to IdkIsdk]

He's fine with noise infection he would hold noisy toys to his ears but recently its batteries he loves he's taking them from everywhere thanks for your reply

[Lizzo30]

Melatonin in my best advice

[Djemima in reply to Lizzo30]

Isn't that for sleep as he sleeps ok usually 12 to 9