I'm a little bit confused about whether this sounds like autism or not?
I have friends, but its a very inclusive group, but when we are out or together I tend to walk behind or in front of them on my own because I feel better on my own. When I'm with other people I get a feeling like I'm closed in and things get really overwhelming very quickly. I'm quite an outgoing person, but I get very drained around people very easily.
I like being on time, and things have to happen at certain times. If we say we are leaving at 8am and we leave at 8.05 or 8.10 I get a 'painful' feeling in my stomach and get very stressed emotionally. Today we left half an hour late for something little and I was about two minutes off a full-blown panic attack.
I get stuck on seemingly random phrases in my head like 'my name, my name... etc' and it keeps repeating. I also have a habit of tracing sentences on my finger with my thumb while I'm saying them or someone else is saying them.
I have little worlds in my head that I go to all the time, like little stories but they're fully developed universes that I 'live' in as much as I do reality. Some of them are exactly the same as 'real-time' but there is someone else there. Some of them are based off books and some are just completely made up by me. When I'm in these worlds I have to listen to certain song and the whole thing plays out like a movie. Things have to play out in a timeline-like way, and nothing can be out of character for that world.
I really love puzzles and word teasers and stuff like that, I get obsessed with them until I finish them.
I hope this is enough detail, thank you for helping. If you need any questions answered feel free to ask.
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lauren21
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It sounds very much like Asbergers. There are all sorts of issues, sleeping, eating, routines, obsessions . Being good at puzzles, construction games, Lego, Knex is an example. Liking music, good at Art, good at computer programming, being like a mini professor in subjects. Each person is unique , you will fit in certain parts and not others. What you are looking for is prediction, finding difficulty in what happens next.Anxiety is one of the biggest issues in Asbergers.
The only way you are going to find out is to get tested. Look at family history and the associated issues like epilepsy, dyslexia, dyspraxia, Tourette's, ADD, ADHD , go back over to grannd parents , parents , brothers and sisters, even if they were not diagnosed do they show any history of these?
There's a test you can take which gives you an indication of whether you are on the spectrum. It's called the Autsim-Spectrum Quotient, and was developed by Simon Baron Cohen, one of the leading authorities on autism. Don't be put off by the title of the show this appeared in. This is a genuine test and this is one of the few places online where you can take it without having to register/give personal details.
Please note, it is NOT diagnostic. If you feel like you want to go down the diagnostic route then you would need to see your GP.
My son has an autism diagnosis and I score quite highly on this test, which fits with the genetic aspect of autism. I'm not quite there but I definitely have some of the traits!
It does sound a little like my husband who refuses to get tested. Maybe high functioning Asbergers. One thing my husband has recently got into is writing a novel. This will be his first fiction novel and it is really good. He tells me he often dreams, and thinks inside his novel. I bet Steven King has Asbergers! Accept yourself and this understand that some people will have a hard time understand you but if they get educated on the syndrome and you have a caring spouse, then you can have good relationships. Knowledge is power. Good luck to you and I respect the fact that you are open-minded and willing to look into possible conditions. We all have something, you know...
Make sure when you visit your GP you write down everything before you get there. I do this now and it makes a huge difference. Everyone is on the Spectrum, it's like a bell curve in maths, it's how far round that curve you fit , it's when the behaviour starts to affect you. Often with a bit of tweaking you can adjust to life.
Your school reports are useful for the diagnosis. Surprising the evidence in those. Being very blunt at times, too frank, is another issue, not realising how you can hurt other people. There is a great book, The reason I Jump, explains how an autistic person feels. May be your library has a copy.
Once you get a diagnosis there are quite a few charities groups which can help. Autism Iniatitave are very good. Anyone can refer you such as GP, you have to be over 16 with a diagnosis . They have groups especially for ladies , go out to events together. It's good having someone who understands. When you go to see the Psychiatrist you need to take a family member with you if that's possible . They go back to your childhood. It's a neurodevelopmental illness but it's assessed by Mental Health.
You can also apply for PIP but you will need experts who understand Autism to help you. Other things you can look for is wearing the wrong clothes, such as wearing a really thick coat in the summer, preferring really soft clothes, nothing which hurts you. May be a dislike of getting your hair cut, Noisy discos, really busy places where there is too much noise, lights. There is an overload of sensory issues.
Have you tried listening to music when you on a bus. It helps you relax. There are also magnesium and vitamin B6 tablets you could try. These help anxiety. Get them in supermarkets like Tescos and Sainsburys. Get the own brand ones, much cheaper and work just as well. Take a couple of weeks to kick in.
Hi. I'm John and soon hitting 39 years old, and for longer than I care to remember I felt the same as you do now. It's in the last 2 weeks that things are starting to make sense following some random personality tests being handed out At work on empathy.
I scored so low I was a tad confused so I received a link to here
and did the test, which when the results came up started to make total sense in a lot of ways. To give you some comfort I've been able to get married, hold the same company for 17 years with a number of promotions but have had deep rooted issues leading to complications with substance and alcohol (none in a long while, and I will love my wife forever for her strength in getting me through).
Long story short I'm now thinking I can find a new way to understand myself and maybe, it will give me the skills needed to tackle the world outside of work. I openly admit I struggle to connect with people and know my behaviours are different, but I'm starting to think that's okay.
Good luck and if I can ever support through messages let me know. I struggled too long and would love to make something of a difference.
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Daughter with AS behavior
Don't know where to start 
Discouraged and disenchanted....
