“Thanks for the chat” were the goodbye words from the first patient we saw yesterday morning. I was accompanied by a new volunteering recruit, a girl with a Japanese looking name, that I condensed to “Sushi”. I later learnt that the name was Russian and from the Tolstoy novel “War and Peace.” But “Thanks for the chat” are exactly the words I love to hear when visiting patients, and makes me want to keep visiting as a volunteer.
The second patient we saw told me she was born in 1329 which made me think she was of the Plantagenet era. But with a little jig inside of her head she corrected herself to have been born in 1932. But I could see, from the forget-me-not flower symbol above her bed, that the lady was diagnosed with dementia. (We are trained to say “living with dementia”.)
At the side of her bed was her bedside table and from the angle where I stood there looked to be several lines of scrawled writing. My young colleague wondered whether it was notes written by a visiting doctor! Imagine that – pencilled notes in Latin on one’s bedside table! I moved my position to align myself with these strange looking markings. Yes, it was in English - a kind of scrambled jottings. One of the first lines I could read was “We are all equal evermore.” I guess the patient had written that. And whether we end up in heaven or hell I guess these words are true!
The patient began to describe her view from the 10th floor of the hospital telling me that there was a giant beetle on an opposite roof. I checked to see but only saw what looked like a large satellite dish! One of the benefits of having a window bed on the 10th floor are the views across north London. At this height one can see the horizon punctuated with church spires, domed buildings and cranes;it feels good to be at the heart of the City.
The same lady was reading a book of poetry and she recalled verse and poetry she had learnt as a girl. She even spoke of some humorous verses on the “Queens Knickers” I googled this later but only found a children’s story book by Nicholas Allan, published 1995. Perhaps she had translated this story into verse format. - she was certainly very descriptive about the variety of knickers the Queen possessed. She also spoke of a children’s story about a little boy who had helped a rabbit with a broken leg. How he had befriended the rabbit and had cared for the rabbit, aiding the rabbit’s recovery.
When I asked this lady what kind of music she might like to hear she surprised me and said “Calypso”. There was one singer she was particularly fond of but she couldn’t remember the name. I used my Spotify premium account and as luck would have it,the name Harry Belafonte stood out. Her eyes lit up when I said his name. I played Day-O (The Banana Boat Song) and bless my soul, the lady sang along! She said to me and Sushi, “You’ve made my day.” That’s another compliment I like, which means we have struck gold.
We then came across a Catholic Priest, a pixie-face man, twinkly eyes and a shock of white hair standing on end as if he’d been electrocuted. This elderly guy was utterly charming – full of stories. He must have been a popular priest, perhaps at one point a Prison Chaplain. He told us that when leaving Wormwood Scrubs (a London prison) many of the prisoners had made a present for him from bits of scrap. He also told of a time when he visited a murderer in his prison cell. That man was doing time for murdering his wife with an axe. However, the prisoner had no remorse at all and could not understand why he was still in prison. He told the priest, “Why am I still here, I’ve already killed her, I’m not going to do it again!” I don’t know if that prisoner was Irish - there is a perverse kind of logic there. On visiting another prisoner, he asked if the man was baptised. The reply was “Me granny had me done.”
Towards the end of our visit, we came across a man lying down in bed and being fed by a nurse. He’d open his mouth and the nurse would pop a spoonful of shepherd’s pie into his mouth. The man had been visited by a Catholic Chaplain at the weekend and he told us that his sins had been forgiven. He also told us that he had a brain tumour. He was only in his 60’s but was very relaxed, jovial and in good spirits, happy to see us and happy to be fed. He told me he felt like a “bird in a nest”, opening his beak and being fed!
Finally a lady who see-sawed between laughter and tears. Tears as she was so anxious about being able to be well enough to visit her sister’s funeral in SE London, later this month. She told me if she had to, she’d just walk out of hospital to attend the funeral. But she also spoke of childhood days in a large family. And that the family kept chickens. But one day her older brother locked her in the chicken coop where one particular chicken kept pecking at her. Yes she was traumatised and scared but on release she was told that this particular chicken would be chosen for dinner that day. On hearing this news she burst into tears and never ate her dinner!
Well that’s it folks. There's no way I'm going to give this job up!
