How To Know When You are Getting Old.

[RoadRunner44]

I was given a tea towel as a gift which featured the following............

I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did. Actually many things are very true and I wasn't offended and found it hilarious!

Everything hurts! What doesn't hurt doesn't work,

The gleam in your eye is the sun shining on your bi-focals.

You feel like the morning after, but you haven't been anywhere,

Your children begin to look middle aged.

You join a health club, but you don't go! A dripping tap causes an uncomfortable urge.

You have all the answers, but nobody asks you to guess.

You look forward to a dull evening. You need glasses to find your glasses.

You turn out the light for economy instead of romance.

You are in a rocking chair but can't make it go. Your knees buckle but your belt won't. Your back goes out more than you do.

Your house is too big, your medicine box is not big enough.

You sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there.

Your Birthday cake collapses from the weight of all the candles.

I think we all have to agree that old age doesnt come alone. However, If you don't laugh you'll cry!. So let's laugh!

😁😆😊 Cheers everyone, Lets all laugh together,

[sassy59]

😂😂 so funny and I could relate to quite a few unfortunately. Thanks for sharing. Xxx👍😘

[Gladwyn]

Funny 😂😂😂😂

[Damon1864 Volunteer]

I like that 🤣🤣have a good night and take care of yourself 😊 Bernadette xx xx 🌈

[Angelagone]

Thanks for the laugh. Some of those are uncomfortably true, but of course I'm used to feeling uncomfortable.....

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Angelagone]

Of course, just a bit of fun. Take care,

[Caspiana]

Hahahahaha 😂😅 So true. All of it!! Thanks for that Chrys. Made me laugh. xx 😂

[watergazer]

😂 great. Thanks. X

[Hidden]

If someone gave me a tea towel like that they’d be in danger of having it wrapped round their throat 😂

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Hidden]

It was just a fun thing and I took it the way it was given as we had shared some moans before she went on holiday. She said she couldn't resist buying it as it reflected our conversation. Im looking for something similar on line to pay her back as her birthday is in June. We are very close friends and know its all in fun.

Cheers.😀

[Hidden in reply to RoadRunner44]

Oh I get that, I was just being silly. My sense of humour doesn’t always come across very well in writing

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Hidden]

Of course, humour is so important and can lift our spirits. Just as long as its done in the right way and with the right people .

Cheers again.😀

[Corin1950]

Funny as it is I hate being given anything like that and I particularly don’t like birthday cards with similar stuff on them. I never send them to my friends.

It’s bad enough getting old without being constantly reminded.

X

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Corin1950]

Of course, I understand perfectly. Actually, my friend and I had been having a moan about our aches and pains just before she went on holiday. She said when she saw the tea towel it would make me laugh because of our recently shared moans about old age not coming alone. She is a dear friend and wouldn't for one minute hurt my feelings purposely. It's only with people close to us who we can share things like this.

Cheers and best wishes.

😊

[Corin1950 in reply to RoadRunner44]

Sorry no offence intended to you or your friend. Most of my conversations with friends are about our ailments it’s just the birthday cards are one of my pet hates.

Have a good weekend

X

[Hacienda]

Thank You Chrys, Made me Laugh. My Posh Tea Towels hanging on the Oven Door, say " He Likes Real Chips" my Mother in Law bought them For me. XXX C.

[Lyd12 in reply to Hacienda]

How to fall out with your daughter in law! Yu might reply "then he can make them"!

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Lyd12]

Chuckle, chuckle.

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Lyd12]

Chuckling still!

[Hacienda in reply to Lyd12]

Good Reply Iris. We laugh & Joke, ma In Law & me. But Hubby does all the Cooking these days, Except This Morning, He managed to get me Flour, So Between each Breadth (had Oxygen on ) I baked a Banana Cake .. (had Two over Riped Bananas ). I miss all my Baking. (May send a slice to Ma In Law). Ha Ha . Love to you Both. XXX C.

[Lyd12 in reply to Hacienda]

I haven't made any cakes for ages, but must have a go, I miss the simple raisin buns I used to make, 24 to fill the tin up and pass some to grandson! Tony loves bananas, has one mashed with cream for breakfast most days. Tony only cooks one meal, sausages and mash, so I get a day off now and again. Only have easy meals these days, and even they wear me out. Love Iris x

[Hacienda in reply to Lyd12]

I was thinking of Cheese Scones Next,or Pastry little savoury Tarts, The mind is playing overtime. I think I'll go in the Garden with a Vino... and THINK about it...Ha Ha. xxxx

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Hacienda]

A message there perhaps?

😀

[Maulics]

I realised when I was building an extension on a house in a small village. The labourer provided was a young "Jack the lad type". A tubby girl about his age from the same village walked by and asked him for a cigerette. His reply was " show me your tits and you can have one" I was giggling to myself until the girl said " not with that OLD BLOKE there". I looked around for an old bloke, no one there. Suddenly I realised she ment me. Sad day.😩😩😩

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Maulics]

Oh thats awful. I hope its not a sign of the times.

[Lyd12 in reply to Maulics]

That young lady may remember saying that when she herself is no longer young, and perhaps feel sorry she said lt.

[Hidden in reply to Maulics]

Ha ha you have reminded me of this one........ when you are 16 and say something, someone in their 20 s will say nar you know nothing wait till you get to my age, at 21 someone who is 30 + will say nar you know nothing wait till your my age, thus it keeps on going even at 50 I can remember someone saying to me, you are still young just wait till you are my age...

Its a bit of a one way road, young people still don't get what its like to be older, and that in many respects is healthy, good manors and respect is good these days. So a good oil painting does not really want a brand new frame, a brand new frame wants something it can feel comfortable with. Had you been younger maybe you might have lost all your cigarettes.

Age is just a number, we all have different skills in life, at different times in our lives.

The outer casing looks aged, a bit worn however its what's inside that counts, many mature folk are very young inside its just the zimmer frames "that hold" us up.

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Hidden]

A lovely response which is very true. It's only when you get older you realise these things. But yes, your words reflect wisdom.

Cheers.

[Lyd12]

How about we compose our own tea towel, mine might say

Bored doing nothing, too tired to do anything ...

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Lyd12]

I like that idea! That's really good I'll remember that one. Actually it would be great if others on the forum follow suit and compose a couple of lines. Who knows, perhaps we could put them together to make our own "Forum Follies". If you think of any more, post them.

The thing is we are all getting older and old age doesn't come alone. These aches and pains are no joke as we oldies know but we would be lost without a sense of humour!

Cheers for now.. xxxxx

[Hacienda in reply to RoadRunner44]

Ma in Law Jokes always a Good send up. Good job she's not on this Forum ! Arrhhh xxx

[MoyB]

Excellent! xx Moy

[RoadRunner44 in reply to MoyB]

Well if you can think of a funny few lines please post them.

Cheers

[MoyB in reply to RoadRunner44]

True story: My husband's aunt went to the GP and took a friend with her. The GP asked Aunt her name. 'What's my name?' she asked her friend. 'Buggered if I know!' said the friend. Then both remembered together and chorused, 'It's Molly!' No dementia involved, just a bit of old age messing about.

xxMoy

[Lyd12 in reply to MoyB]

Reminds me of the day I visited my Mum in her care Home. She greeted me with "who are you?" LAughing, I said "Have you got any children, Mum? " "Yes, YOU, !" She said, triumphantly, and we both laughed, but it made me sad. Iris x

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Lyd12]

Sometimes you find a little humour works wonders at the right time.

Cheers xx

[MoyB in reply to Lyd12]

Yes, I'm sure it did. But sometimes you have to laugh too, don't you?! 😉

[RoadRunner44 in reply to MoyB]

Lovely to share humour particularly if you know you both have a similar sense of humour. It lightens our lives when you can laugh together.

Xxx

[MoyB in reply to RoadRunner44]

It certainly does. xx Moy

[RoadRunner44 in reply to MoyB]

😁😀😊😃

[Hidden]

How about - you have to phone your mobile from your landline to find your mobile?

[RoadRunner44]

That's a good one Don. If you can think of any more please post them. Lyd12 sent a good one and suggested we make up our own tea towel. I'm going to try and think of one later on.

Cheers. X

[mikeadams51]

So true but where’s there life there’s hope. Take care and stay lucky

[RoadRunner44 in reply to mikeadams51]

That's perfectly true Mike. Will add this one to the list.

Cheers

[Lyd12]

How about " if you're fed up with all the old pains, don't worry - a new one will be along soon".

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Lyd12]

Oh,, that's good too! Another one to add to the list.

[SquirrelsHolt]

Yes, I'm laughing with you and everybody else on this forum 😀😁😃😄!!!!! 🐿🌈💕

[RoadRunner44 in reply to SquirrelsHolt]

I'm glad you are laughing too! We all have something that's not working properly and we laugh because we understand and each others problems.

😀😁😃😄😅

[Titian8]

I think that old people are always 20 years older than my current age👍 so there's no way I'm in that category, particularly as am 23 in my mind.

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Titian8]

Oh yes! I feel the same as you. In fact I sometimes can't believe I'm76. My head tells me Im not anywhere near that age but my body has its own story to tell.

Cheers.

[Nicholatracy]

Lot of truth there 🐞

[RoadRunner44 in reply to Nicholatracy]

Unfortunately you are right. We can all find some things in it that apply to each of us.

[Patk1]

🤣