It's a Great Life.: The tortoise is a... - Lung Conditions C...

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It's a Great Life.

42 Replies

The tortoise is a clever beast.

He has his life well sorted

When life gets tough he pops back in

And says that's it...aborted

Back in that shell what does he do?

Knit himself a sweater?

Perhaps he's got some books to read

Or writes his mum a letter

And when the cold dark winter comes

He doesn't mess around.

He shuts up shop till springtime comes

And never can be found

(Except for Timmy)

42 Replies
sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Lovely Timmy has the right idea. Lovely tortoise xxxx

in reply tosassy59

Definitely our oldest member. 🙂 That's not him by the way, I hired a stand-in. 😉

sassy59 profile image
sassy59 in reply to

Oh I thought it was him. Never mind, the stand in is lovely too. Xxxx😘💖

in reply tosassy59

I couldn't afford Timmy, he as celebrity status! 🧐😉😘

HungryHufflepuff profile image
HungryHufflepuff in reply to

Timmy has a stunt double? Our new celebrity 🐢

skischool profile image
skischool

Timmy looks so lovely but should his shell ever sag and droop

Put him in your pressure cooker as he will make a very nice tasty soup. :) x

sassy59 profile image
sassy59 in reply toskischool

Wicked skis. Xxxx

in reply tosassy59

He's a good lad really. Just go a bit confused between 'turtle' and 'tortoise.. 🙄

in reply toskischool

Strewth! My life wouldn't be worth living if I did that!😱

skischool profile image
skischool in reply to

In hard times Don there is no difference between a tortoise and a turtle. :) x

Izb1 profile image
Izb1 in reply toskischool

Oh! p l ease x

Jaybird19 profile image
Jaybird19 in reply toskischool

Oooh thats oh not oooo

beautiful tortoise--- and all you see is food! Have your tea bags and custard creams not arrived yet

skischool profile image
skischool in reply toJaybird19

Nope but i have an ox's tail for soup tonight lol :) x

Jaybird19 profile image
Jaybird19 in reply toskischool

Enjoy

Doesnt sound as good if you call it cows tail.

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana in reply toskischool

😱😱😱😱

corriena profile image
corriena

Brilliant and fluffy are tortoise thought so to 😀 🐢

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44

Reminds me of my tortoise Don. Sad end though. When he woke up from his Winter sleep I gave him a bath ina a shallow container. He loved it!. I did this each day until I eventually let him back in the garden.

We couldn't find him later on and just assumed he was around somewhere and didn't worry too much. We never found him from that day on. Some years later while clearing the pond his shell was found. With hindsight I believe he enjoyed the washing and watering experience so much that he sensed the water in the pond and made his way there. Back then it was just an ornamental pond with no access for wildlife to climb in and out. The weight of his shell had obviously dragged him down and he drowned.

Sorry it's not a happy story but it's what happened.

Cheers, Chrys x

Hacienda profile image
Hacienda in reply toRoadRunner44

That is so sad Chrys. Poor ? his name. xxxx

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44 in reply toHacienda

Sorry, he's a she and her name was Lazy Daisy. My daughter called her this because she didn't go very far. In the garden.

Later on, her friend brought her tortoise (a male) along to see if the two tortoises wanted to be friends. That male tortoise made a beeline for ours. I never realized how fast they move! He was an absolute pest and kept on chasing our Lazy Daisy around the garden. She tried so hard to get away from him but no use! In the end he was sent home in disgrace and wasn't ever invited to play in our garden again!

THE END.

Cheers, Chrys x

Hacienda profile image
Hacienda in reply toRoadRunner44

Arrr, Poor love , Lazy Daisy & The Amorous Tortoise Tale. Never got his Girl. You could write a Lovely little Book here Chrys. Stay safe & Well. XXX C.

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44 in reply toHacienda

Sounds great! If I'm still locked down in a couple of months......anythings possible.

Cheers, Chrys x

in reply toHacienda

It's so sad, I'll never sleep tonight for sobbing my heart out. And it's buggered-up my happy thread of Timmy and his friends. First horrible Skis wants to make him into soup, then some randy tortoise tries to rape poor Lazy Daisy who ends up in a watery grave! I don't think I'll ever be able to write another poem ever again. 🐢😩

Hacienda profile image
Hacienda in reply to

Oh Yes You Will. .... Sweet Dreams Don. See what Tomorrow Brings with the Tortoise Saga. xxx C.

in reply toHacienda

I will be seeking counselling this morning. 😉x

Hacienda profile image
Hacienda in reply to

😂😂😂😘🌞

tillie profile image
tillie in reply toRoadRunner44

I should think so, his behaviour on first meeting tut tut So sorry you had to find Lazy Daisy this way. x

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44 in reply totillie

It's sad when any pet dies but we kept on looking for her long afterwards thinking she had just wandered away. It was the not knowing what had happened to her was what was so hard.

Chrys x

tillie profile image
tillie in reply toRoadRunner44

My long loved pets so sad when died. My heart went out to you feeling the love you had for her and the not knowing. Sure there pets but we loved them x

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44 in reply totillie

Although it was a long time ago you always remember them.

Thank you.

in reply toRoadRunner44

😢 What a sad tale.

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana in reply toRoadRunner44

Oh my. 😓 Poor thing. xx

Izb1 profile image
Izb1

You always manage to make me laugh Don x

in reply toIzb1

It's alright for you, I'm crying my eyes out here. 😥

MELNEL profile image
MELNEL

LOL lovely Timmy!! Thanks for sharing!! 🌹🌹🌹

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana

Lovely Don. I hope you are keeping well. xx 😊💕

in reply toCaspiana

I'm okay thanks Cas, just traumatize by terrible tales of Timmy and Tommy tortoises.

Our tortie was Tommy,

he thought he was a miner

he dug deep into the soil

then back out when winter was over.

(you'll have to excuse me, I didn't sleep well last night. ZZZZZZZZ)

in reply to

What happened to him. Did he forget to reverse out one spring? I'm not sure I can stand another sad tale. 🙄

No, my mum had to help him out of the hole he'd dug himself, but it was a long time ago so the inevitable happened. Sorry but even torties die eventually. :-(

in reply to

Jonathan the tortoise is 189 years old.

helenlw7 profile image
helenlw7

I’m so glad I’ve managed to get back on HU. I really missed your rhymes!

I’m glad to have you back, Helen, you were my favourite reader. 😘

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