Struggling !!

[Kathy321]

Hi all.

I am so glad I have this site to vent on. I am now at week 10 of no smoking. I am using patches but as everyone knows who have used them, they don’t give you the fix like a cigarette did. I have 2 weeks left of these then that’s it, I’m on my own and not looking forward to that !!!

I can’t believe I am still having cravings although I can now enjoy wine again after posting on here a few weeks ago that I couldn’t so that’s one good thing and I am taking that as a positive that in only a few weeks this has changed.

After being diagnosed with vulvar cancer I know that I can never smoke again and I never will. I gave up right after my diagnosis which I do pat myself on the back about as it was one of the most stressful times in my life as didn’t know if it had spread etc but still didn’t smoke. The EXCELLENT news is that I got the all clear on 22 nd Dec after having major surgery in November to remove it.

Even though I know I can’t smoke again as this would increase my chances of this cancer returning it still hurts that I can’t smoke. I feel like a spoiled child thinking I want one !!

I can’t even get excited about booking this years holidays as the first thing that comes to my mind is it’s the first holiday I’ll go on as a non smoker so I won’t enjoy it ! Sad I know !

Sorry for the rant (again). I just hope that all this goes away soon and I can get on with living my life without constantly thinking about smoking and the relationship I USED to have with it

Thanks for being here 😀

[sassy59]

You’re doing so well Kathy and have the all clear from cancer. Keep going and stay strong. One day at a time and well done so far. Xxxxx

[mrsmummy]

It is amazing isn't it that nicotine manages to fool us so completely. It enters our body with it's little friends the toxins and causes untold harm while completely and utterly conning us into believing it is our friend and supporter in times of stress. Don't look on it as being deprived. Instead see it as being released from a prison term under a particularly nasty gaoler. Keep going you are doing a brilliant job.

[Dragonmum in reply to mrsmummy]

Almost all Stop Smoking Products contain nicotine, apart from the drugs which contain some quite nasty ingredients which in some cases have had dire consequences; it must be assumed that nicotine is not the problem, it is the carcinogens present in tobacco smoke which have to be avoided. I have a friend who has been chewing nicotine gum for more than ten years now (and paying through the nose for the privilege) and she will still walk behind smokers in the street to get a whiff! I, on the other hand switched to vaping eight years ago this month, after smoking for 60+ years, and I now find tobacco smoke offensive. There are different levels of nicotine dependence so if it all gets too much for you Kathy there is an alternative.

[Lillian12]

Well done my way of getting through things was one day at a time and rather than thinking you had to give up get yourself in a frame of mind where you choose not to smoke each day by saying this and thinking it you will find yourself a bit more receptive to it. Your mind control is the best way .If it's in your mind you have to stop it's like something's being taken from you and you get anti. Just say to yourself. today I choose not to smoke then your minds in control of your choice I hope that makes sense lol

[hypercat54]

Hi Kathy you are doing brilliantly so keep on going. I think you are going to be amazed how much easier your holiday will be without smoking. I went on a coach to London early September and it was wonderful not having to keep getting off for a ciggie. Also in the hotel room too and on London transport. You are not giving anything up - on the contrary you are gaining peace of mind and freedom from the addiction.

I have moved on past the patches now but am still using the while inhalator. This might help you as well? You can get them free from the NHS (in the UK) or you can buy them in the chemists.

Well done. x

[Polly4acre]

Giving up cigarettes because you have to instead of wanting to is like a little bereavement . You can't get back what you most want because you know it will have devastating consequences . My motivation to stop was fear, almost 4 years ago I was diagnosed with copd, gave up cold turkey, have only really wanted a cigarette twice in that time but each time I see someone light up on t.v I can taste the tobacco, feel the first lungful going in, feel the relief it gives, but that is all really. The craving has gone and so will yours, honestly ! it will become the memory only of having a fag but that will be all. 10 weeks is a big achievement. If you go on holiday and come back without giving in you will have cracked it. I have reached the status of a non smoker now, how good you will feel to fill in a questionaire to tick the ex- smoker box, then the non smoker ! To think that I chose situations, jobs etc. etc. on the availabilty of fag breaks is a bit mad to me now. Keep on with it and good luck to you, I would love to be well enough to go holiday, Polly X

[Stumpy55]

Hello Kathy321, firstly WELL DONE !! for giving up fags, I admire anyone who can just stop just like that and it takes some doing. So pleased you are free from cancer now, what a relief that must be. If I were you, deffinately book that much needed holiday, you deserve it and say to yourself " I have never smoked" and get on with living. What a strong character you are and I would be proud of myself if I were you. ✋️😊

[katieoxo60]

Well done Kathy, its nearly three months now and you have the all clear so that is a good reason to keep up the good work. Try to find other things to take your mind off cigarettes, give yourself a treat, take care x