Advice needed please

[pet-lamb]

We have just last week found out our 87yr old Mam has lung cancer.she's been i. Hospital 10 days with a chest infection but will be discharged today to a nursing home.the doctors have decided it's not good to give treatment as Mam also has other health problems she needs a pacemaker has only one kidney hashimotos diabetes emphysema macular degeneration of both eyes one has a bleed the other wet. she's almost deaf and blind depressed following the death of our brother mam's eldest son from cancer in February and her sister and brother in law in may..we feel quality of life is what we want for mam now .but we are lost don't know what's happening next. doctors don't know how long mam's got they say the cancer is confined to her right lung and there are no secondary but also say it's in her blood.they say she doesn't need palliative care yet .

[mrsmummy]

I would advise that you call the BLF helpline on 03000 030 555 during office hours. The BLF staff will be able to help you look at all options available to you and advise/give information on any you are not aware of.

[pet-lamb in reply to mrsmummy]

Thank you mrs mummy .

[sassy59]

How sad for you to see your mother like that. Such a lot to cope with. Sending hugs to you all. Xxxx

[pet-lamb]

Thank you sassy59

[annenic]

Just make sure your mum is comfortable and see he as often as you can. Went through this with my dad a few years ago. Sending hugs x

[pet-lamb]

Thank you huggs x

[katieoxo60]

Hello pet-lamb, sorry to hear your mam is so poorly, the best you can do is settle for the nursing home care and try to visit as often as you can. It is only two years since I lost my mum and there is no way my sister and I could have met her care needs so understand your feelings. You must do what you feel is best for your mam, the home can give her twenty four hour care and your GP should be able to support you through this traumatic time. Take care x

[pet-lamb in reply to katieoxo60]

Thank you katieoxo60 none of the family could provide 24hour care especially as we are all aging and live too far away.so we are relived that the home has taking in she seems to like it there The problem was made unnecessary worse throughout the year by the social workers involvement it nearly ended with the family breakup .That's a long story .

[katieoxo60 in reply to pet-lamb]

Don't worry pet-lamb, all her needs will be met and if she is happy that's all that counts especially this late in life. My sister and I would say she is in the best place, much better than a hospital ward. Will be thinking of you.

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[Time_2_drink]

Thinking of you pet -lamb. Hope your mam can be made comfortable Your user. Name brings Back memorys of my chidhood my Mam and granda used to call me pet -lamb .Best wishes to you and your Mam Take care

[pet-lamb in reply to Time_2_drink]

Thank you time 2drink its my mams pet name for me too

[Dedalus]

Bless her - hope the nursing home is a good one and gives her the care she so deserves x

[pet-lamb]

Thank you Dedalus she's really low just now .not surprising really dying of cancer had to leave her home give up a lot of her possessions youngest daughter she does on hardly visits .but on the plus side she is in a very good home and her every need is being met.I'm going down tomorrow to take her out hopefully that will help