Anxiety after diagnosis. Confused at ... - Lung Conditions C...

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Anxiety after diagnosis. Confused at first...now covering my head up in bed. :(

phyllis_liberty profile image
37 Replies

Well, I have been in denial for a bit now, since my diagnosis. I pretended to have a grip on this. I don't. I am terrified of what is going to happen in the next few yrs. As I have told my dear friend here...I'm not afraid of death, but I sure wanna' live!!!

I need someone to help me feel a bit better. I know I am not helping myself by staying in the bed like I am. I wake up with this doomed feeling...and butterflies in my tummy. :( I know I need to exercise...etc. However, I am not finding the energy right now. I'm just plain ole' miserable .I hate this feeling so much. I have clinical depression, and anxiety. That does not help huh?

I don't want to bring others down. I am aware that posts like this tend to do that, and I'm very sorry. We all feel down at times, and I can't seem to get out of this depression I'm in.

Hopefully, I will soon.

God bless us all,

Phyllis

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phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty
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37 Replies
CINDYBEAUDETTE profile image
CINDYBEAUDETTE

I know how you feel. I have to force myself to get out of bed. I have no motivation anymore. I want to do thing but have no energy. I want to live but hate feeling like my body won't help me with even a little get up and go. My husband tells me to get angry and fight my body. Some days I can and others I can't seem to find that fight. Its like my motivation is lost. But we need to fight and fight. Got to get up out of that bed or we will be giving up. Do not give up.

phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty in reply to CINDYBEAUDETTE

Hi Cindy...that's my daughters name by the way. Thank you for the response. It is strange isn't it...that before diagnosis I found it so easy to get up, get myself dolled up, and go out. Now, I feel like an old woman. :o

I know I need to get up, and out. It's just difficult right now. I might need some counseling?

Truly scared,

God bless you,

Phyllis

CINDYBEAUDETTE profile image
CINDYBEAUDETTE in reply to phyllis_liberty

Yes. Please go talked to someone.

in reply to CINDYBEAUDETTE

HI sindy boy do I Know how you feel. I go to sleep very resolute saying I will get up and get downstairs Nd try to do some of my crafting but I'm still in bed I'm very scared about the prognosis how mujch longer do I have how well am I really a scared they have the wrong diagnosis and that's why I feel so bad lol the time. The way is ful,of good intentions but when morning arrives my good intentions have left with the night. IF anyone cN help let us all know what to do,

LOve to u all shannie04

Annie31 profile image
Annie31 in reply to CINDYBEAUDETTE

Absolutely!!!

Poohpoohmad profile image
Poohpoohmad

Hello there,

Firstly, hiding head in sand is what l feel most of folk do at some point, me included. I want to go out, l want to go to the gym and l want to the energy to do my housework. I've not been diagnosed with anything but asthma which l know is nothing compared to many folks on here. Under investigations for several things but don't fit in any box.

My advise is this, small steps. Set tiny goals such as get up & dress. Next add a shower. Next add meeting a friend at yours, then meeting out for coffee. Maybe let a trusted friend into your world of honesty.

Never be afraid to ask for help and an ear and shoulder.

Hope this helps.

Oh, and do talk to your GP.

phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty in reply to Poohpoohmad

Working on getting a different GP, as the one I have only wants to flirt with me on visits. :o Seriously. And he is 77 yrs. old. I have needed another Dr. for some time now. He just acts like this is no big deal. To him...I suppose it's not. Geez. It's hard to find adequate Drs. anymore. At least that's how I feel.

Crying in my pillow......

Thanks for responding,

Phyllis

Poohpoohmad profile image
Poohpoohmad in reply to phyllis_liberty

Another doctors thoughts is what happened to me. Same dr 30 yrs and a new one thought must be mire than asthma so why not try someone new.

suej2251961 profile image
suej2251961 in reply to phyllis_liberty

TELL HIM TO GET LOST

jjnanna profile image
jjnanna in reply to phyllis_liberty

OMG never hesitate to change your doc ... I did and it was the best thing I ever did, I certainly think I would have been dead by now otherwise !! Set along with the list of things to do !! Chin up xxxxxx

shadow4me profile image
shadow4me in reply to jjnanna

I am changing mine today am sick of going down and made to feel a nuisance I feel like I have been sent home to die and apart from my family have no support from the medic side x

Annie31 profile image
Annie31

Hi there Phyllis, I agree with all replies so far and can totally empathise with the way you are feeling, as do others obviously. I have suffered with anxiety since childhood, depression with anxiety since adulthood so I know it is very hard to get your head around this new diagnosis. I am 67, A great husband with four wonderful children and six grandchildren and I still have days of feeling this is not worth living all the time feeling so guilty for feeling like that. My keyboard has gone funny - will be back!

Annie31 profile image
Annie31

As pooh says, the answer is little steps! Do something each day that you feel good about and that you have achieved. I bought a pedal exerciser as I had done the same as you and had difficulty getting out of bed, so much easier to stay there! Did a little bit of walking again, even if it wasn't everyday to begin with, 15 minutes on my pedalo, my husband takes me out for rides in the car and now I have after 5 months have had two meals out, even though I haven't had the appetite to eat all, but this is a huge step for me, with confidence and self esteem which is so important when feeling like this.

mobile1946 profile image
mobile1946

hi Phylis sorry you are feeling so bad, i was the same with depression and anxiety.i remember as a wee child, i used to feel depressed all the time,I had a wonderful upbringing but there was always that nagging feeling deep inside me that made me scared.this went on all through my life ,been to all the doctors had all the happy pills only they never made me happy,got married had three kids still felt like a zombie.one day after around 40 years of feeling sçared and depressed i chucked my pills down the toilet(,i don“t advise that), it was horrific it took a long time for the withdraw i felt to leave my body ,i am now 70 years old and don't suffer at all from any of it .I have to tell myself often don't look back don't look forward be right here in the now it works for me .you will feel better sweetie you will be ok. the day's you don't feel good lay around take care of yourself, you are precious .

Annie31 profile image
Annie31

Hi again, have just read your previous posts and that you quit smoking 12 days ago! Well done! But this could also explain the extras feelings you are having today - I think I read somewhere that two or three weeks are the worst times for feeling very low and one of the most difficult times in your quit! Believe me, after a few days of quitting you can feel euphoric that you have succeeded that far and that is when reality sets in that you are not smoking and the evil Mr Nic is trying to get you! I think you will find this is a difficult period for anyone quitting and so this is adding to how you are feeling at the moment with everything else you have on your mind. If you have still quit at the time of writing you are doing so well!!! You will get by this, I know as I have been there, just don't expect too much of yourself at this stage - the other thing is try to change your routine and habits from when you smoked as this will make it easier - every best wish to you Ann

revagayle profile image
revagayle

Hi, When I first got my diagnosis (emphysema) I was a total wreck! This forum & another American Lung Assoc. one called Inspire helped to calm me down. I try to live for today & not speculate & dwell about what will happen to me in the future. Eat well, get LOTS of exercise, take your meds & stay away from sick people & wash your hands frequently. This REALLY sucks but try to enjoy your life! Take care & best of luck quitting smoking. Gayle

suej2251961 profile image
suej2251961

come on girl i was like you a few weeks a go but i no i have got to try and fight it .thank god for mirtazapine i say and grand kids.they really do make you have to get up .also i no people who have had it 20 years so why carnt you be one of them .i got it diagnosed 3 months ago ................life really is so short so come on get a cuppa coffee and ring one of youre mates are family and talk it does help you no also have you got a garden if so get in it are have a big hug of any one who cares about you .i have days like you all the time but if we are gonna have this ...........illness then dont let it get the best of ya girl come on girl POWER

EDITED

suej2251961 profile image
suej2251961

ALSO YOU A BEAUTIFUL just remember that the picture of you is so beautiful so get some lippy on and get writing some posts on here i love it well thats when i have time cos i make sure im busy so i dont have to think about things try it

Hayley_ profile image
Hayley_

God, it's awful isn't it? In think we've all been through that a some point. When I first got diagnosed, I thought my life was over and went on self destruct. I thought, what was the point in giving up smoking, or doing anything to help myself as it was all hopeless. People just don't seem to realise what your going through. I think if you start getting up and out and about you will feel much better. I know it's hard to find the energy and will to care but it will get easier. I try not to linger in bed in the morning cause as soon as you wake reality hits you and you just lay there thinking about it. I hope it works out for you. Your stronger than you realise.

coffitup profile image
coffitup

don't be sorry, hun...we all go through what you're feeling, at some stage after diagnosis...it's a natural reaction. Acceptance is the hard part, but you still have a bit of the summer yet, and if you don't feel like exercising, get a comfy chair, a good book, and your favourite music, and follow the sun around your garden or park...it helps...I know. If you need to be in bed...STAY in bed, you'll know when you're ready to get up and about again, but just remember...it's a diagnosis....YOU make of it all you can!!Biggest hugs to you. We're all here for you when you need us, and it WILL improve.xxxxxxx

welllaners profile image
welllaners

I have just read all the amazing posts, you have a lot of people here in your corner. One day at a time, you have a lot of good years ahead. Start to look after number one, get out of bed and start the rest of your life.

Schmicter profile image
Schmicter

Hi Phyllis,

Yes, it is really difficult at times with both the diagnosis, plus any quit smoking symptoms. Depression is common to both. It is also very easy for those on the outside to just say you should do this or that. And to top it off..no help from your doctor. I can say for sure...the disease can become stable and have little effect on your day to day life, I have managed it so far and I feel good about it. It does take a change and commitment, but with medicines and medical support...(you need a new doc) and a realization that all is not bad...but can be very very normal you will have the same.

Hi Phyllis. I have been reading all of the very supportive posts on here,giving good advice from the lovely caring people who have found themselves in your position. I can't find that anyone has thought of two things which may buck you up.

You are the same person today as you were on the day before your diagnosis. You can do the same things and even look forward to a better quality of life because you have stopped smoking.

A diagnosis of COPD usually comes in mid to later life and from reading many posts on here it can be a shock and leave people thinking that there is no good in the future.

There are quite a few of us on here who have lived with serious, debilitating and progressive lung conditions since our childhood. I mean over 60 years of it. We had to learn how to get control of our conditions, live our lives as well as our 'normal' friends and learn how to chivvy and sometimes bully the medics in order to get the right treatment. We have never known any different and most of us have led very full lives and are still 'giving it plenty'.

It does have its bad days, of course it does. Even people who do not have to cope with and adapt to handling our problems get down. You have a lot of love and support on here. Be kind to yourself on the bad days and take two steps forward on the good ones. xx

in reply to

Add RA, Osteoarthritis, Osteoporosis, Breast Cancer, Vasculitis and Hypertension to my Bronchiectasis with Pseudomonas Colonies, and you would think I'd have given up. But I love life, in spite of constant pain. I love all those who share some of my diseases, and these forums are inspirational. Although I dread bad weather, as I can't walk very far and use a rollator. Love to all. xxx

shouty profile image
shouty in reply to

Amazing reply 😁

shadow4me profile image
shadow4me

I to am like this and suffer the depression and anxiety and hate the mornings has I wake up anxious but I'm beginning to realise that it has to come from within has I have found the medics not very helpful and feel lost ,Im sure one day others will give us our inspiration to go on so many brave people on this site hope you feel better soon xx

Posative profile image
Posative

Hi Phyllis please please try to be more posative I was diagnosed 5 years ago with IPF I spent a week in bed crying I was afraid to close my eyes as I thought I wasn't going to wake up panic then a friend said are you going to waste any time you have left or get up and get on with it I decided on the latter I was only given 3_5 years I am determined to prove the Dr wrong and fight please do the same as it does work it's not always easy keep in touch xx

Mooskie profile image
Mooskie

Hi Phyllis: I just want to say it is okay to

let your feelings come through. This group is very understanding and most of us have been where you are. That's one of the reasons we exist. I can totally understand how you are feeling and wonder if you have asked your doctor for any help with anxiety and/or depression. I hope you will get help quickly. hugs

phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty

Yes Mooskie, I am on medication for depression and anxiety. I am afraid to take the anxiety meds. too much. Especially at night to sleep. That is probably one reason why I am staying in bed so much. I just don't sleep well anymore. :(

1968 profile image
1968

Hi, few questions: what were you diagnosed with and when, what stage are you at and do you still smoke.

It's natural to panic about your health, thats your body's coping mechanism.

Please a BLF nurse, they are there to support, also please ask as much questions on here as we are all here to support each other.

Be strong-focused and you can turn this around, look to the future.

My moto is die with it not of it.

Since being diagnosed 6 yes ago myself I have turned my life about.

Healthier no d body and soul.

Take care, we are all gere for you and one another xxx

david1968

phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty

Right after I joined the group here I was diagnosed. Stage 1 mild copd. I quit smoking. I know it's natural to panic and feel anxious, but I hate the feeling I get in my tummy. I feel like I'm dying already.

I am normally a very strong person. That's another reason this is hitting me so hard. I am use to being a real tough lady. I feel weak now though, and that depresses me. :(

Thanks for your concern.

God bless,

Phyllis

1968 profile image
1968 in reply to phyllis_liberty

I am also stage 1, by all acounts this is the best stage to be diagnosed at ( ironic my it sound) I to was down I guess due to lack of knowledge and uncertainty fir the future, I changed all that and I'm now stronger all round and focused on the future, I'm 49 in September and plan to be around a lot longer 😉 I'm on no medication and have Bullous emphysema, I know my limits , exercise and eat well oh and have a good out look.

Stay focused and all this bad inner callings will pass. please stay off the cigarettes as it will get you, study up on your condition by using the BLF web site, exercise is the key to everything.

If you want to talk, we're here.

casper99 profile image
casper99

Hi Phyllis, I know what your going through as I reacted the same way. It was like having that PTSD, I was in shock.

First, you need to see a different Docter, he sounds like a dirty old man. Then, ask to try a different antidepressant to stop that awful gut churning feeling.

Mine waa lasting all day and eventually cauaed severe weakness because I just couldn't eat. I felt so nauseous.

It took at least four different antidepressants to find the right one.

Mild COPD is very good. You've caught it early and it shouldn't have much bearing on your life for many many years. Which is why your old letch is more interested in you than your COPD, haha.

I stopped smoking and now, 5 years after diagnosis, my fev1 has improved significantly.

Get your war paint on and back out there. This is not a death sentence, so you would find yourself stuck in that bed for 2 or 3 decades. Pointless.

Get exercising and follow the advice you've been given to keep yourself fit.

Well done for stopping smoking, as someone has already said, that alone will be affecting your mood but, soon, you'll feel so pleased that you've done it.

You can and will feel better, I promise. xx

Something that helps me - ' A ship is safest when it is in the harbour but it is not what it was designed for'.

I also created a six point plan to do anything- small steps and congratulated myself every time I completed a step. Getting out the door was the first one. Yours could be getting out of bed.

Good luck with everything ❤️ Xx

1968 profile image
1968

Lively words of encouragement, stay focused-have a plan and exceed your goals.

Xxx

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana

Hello Phyllis.

I so understand that feeling of not wanting to move. Sometimes it's just too hard. *HUG* We all want to live but in our case we have to work a bit harder than the average person out there. That means putting in the exercise, eating healthy and maintaining a good lifestyle. Take baby steps. You can do it Phyllis. I am thinking of you and sending you all the positive vibes I can muster.

Cas xx 🌞🌿🌞🌿🌞🌿

phyllis_liberty profile image
phyllis_liberty

'Sobbing....wow. Thank you so much for reminding me Roey.

HUGS!!

Phyllis

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