Mum with COPD

[270370]

Hi my Mum has recently been diagnoised with COPD unsure what her lung function is I remember doctor said one lung was not taking any air in at all. Oxygen is between 84-90% she has been offered but refused it, she does not eat and does not want to go out, she is in an inhaler and other tablets as she also has heart failure. I am really worried and do not no what to do she is STILL smoking and says she cut it down from 40 a day to 6 but I have bee checking and she is still smoking atleast 25 a day.

Really worried she is 73 and been smoking since she was 14

[Pantani]

I'm 67 and up till last February had smed on and off since my teens. I tried to give up a number of times but after being in hospital with a bad chest infection the consultant told me to give up or Id be continually in and out of hospital. I havnt had a cigarette since. Hope your mother sees sense.

[y_not]

Hi Natalie,

It must be frustrating to watch your Mum but, short of throwing all the cigs away I don't see how you can stop her.

Her O2 levels must be a concern for the doctor, as I understand, anything below 88% carries a risk of beginning to damage internal organs (heart, lungs, brain etc). Heart failure just adds to the issue because the blood is carrying less O2 so she will be weak and have little interest in going anywhere.

I hope this doesn't sound awful but I would suggest stopping focusing on the smoking and start to work on building great memories with your Mum. Take her out (borrow/hire a wheelchair) to the park, nip to the shop and pick up the ingredients to make a cream tea at home with her, watch her favourite film etc, etc.

Your Mum's got, potentially, a lot of years left so enjoy the time with her rather than risk a thought at some point in the future of "I wish I hadn't nagged her ...".

Sometimes we have to enjoy what we have rather than trying to change everything to suit what we think is right.

Good luck and enjoy your Mum's company for many years to come!

[270370 in reply to y_not]

Thank you that was a lovely reply Mum can still get out and about without any help she just does not want to. I think she has given up x

[lynnekay]

Hi. I am sorry to hear about your mother. My guess is that she's in denial and maybe depressed. COPD often causes anxiety and depression (It's scary getting breathless!). Only she can decide about smoking, but her GP practice should offer smoking cessation and there's a very good medication called Champix which takes all the craving out of giving up. (I've been there!!)

I don't take any notice of my lung function but work on how I feel on any day and try and do as much as I can.

I was heading down the road that you mother is on, but, persuaded by my COPD nurse went on a Pulmonary Rehab course which changed my life! I learnt how to manage my COPD, bad days, self care, domestic chores and best of all, was given exercises to do to help me stay as fit as possible. My quality of life has improved no end, and while I'm not going to be cured at least I feel that I'm coping a lot better

Unfortunately only your mother can decide on her way forward, but I think the advice given by y-not is excellent.

Hope this helps

[Hidden]

Try to get her to eat small meals or even snacks buy her a ecigeret as they are good as I use one my self do not fors it on her ask her to try. It when she is ready. And just leave it by were she keeps her cigs but do not keep on to her about it as she my not try it as that what. Happed with me every one keep on saying try it all the time then they give up and now that is what I smoke

[Offcut]

I know what you are going though my mother was 93 and still telling my sister and me off. She is still your mum and it is hard to be firm but you have to be to get the cigs down and the O2 up.

Be Well

[270370]

Thank you all

[FarmerD]

Hi Natalie,I started smoking when I was 9 years old.I stopped,with the help of the smoking sensation team at my GP,3 years ago after a bout of pneumonia.I,ll be 60 years old next mont.The one thing sticks in my mind when people say they can,t stop is,NOT HAVING A CIGARETTE WILL NOT KILL YOU, having one could!I have very severe emphysema awaiting surgery.Can you go with mum to see the doctor?They will explain to continue smoking will only make both heart and lung conditions worse quite quickly.I know how frustrating us oldies can be so I do sympathise,seek some help,there should be a nurse that specialises in Copd at your surgery that can help you.Best of luck.D.💐

[270370 in reply to FarmerD]

9 years old wow well done you for giving up. Mum does not want to give up that is the problem she is definitely in denial and does not want to admit that it is the dam fags that are causing the problem and to be honest the more we moan at her the more she digs her heels in.

Thank you for your reply and well done