No photos, only memories ...

[Lyd12]

Our first baby, Heather, was born 27/12/59 and died 29/12/59. She was six weeks premature. somehow, this year, I am thinking about that time more than usual. In those days hospitals could not offer a great deal. I remember the nurse saying -"the consultant comes in on a Thursday". they estimated her weight to be 4lbs., not so tiny nowadays.

[Hidden]

Our babies will never be forgotten by us, thankfully although still tragic to loose a child we can now take photos, plan a funeral and spend time with our babies. My thoughts are with you today on Heather's birthday. Hugs, Xris x

[redted]

Without going into too much detail,I know what you mean and how you feel,there is a little cupboard in our hearts,and every now and then,the door comes open and the memories flood out,sometimes it hurts like hell,other times we give a smile as we remember,and it seems the older the door gets the more often it tends to open.

[O2Trees]

Hi Lyd, it must be so hard to know that treatment exists now which might have helped Heather to have survived if it had existed back then. And how sad that, apart from carrying her inside you, you only had her with you for two days - although I guess she will never die in your heart.

Thinking of you and sending love at such a sad time.

[sassy59]

Thinking of you Lyd and how times have changed. Bless you and Heather. xxx

[Hidden]

The Angels Guard Her With Love...

[jimmyw123]

these memories never leave us lyd, but as vashti says "the angels guard her with love"

my old mother is still living at 92 years old, 73 years ago she had a son [my brother] in similar circumstances, she never forgets this.

it does make you wonder if this would happen nowadays.

my thoughts are with you at this time lyd, love jimmy xxx

[Lyd12]

thanks for all the lovely kind words. Iris x

[i_am_iamnins_nin]

Thinking of you, and understanding, some days the memories are so strong. I like to think my first born is guarded by Angels.

Love Nin x

[helingmic]

My dear Lydia, It must be very sad to revisit this time. I sincerely hope that 2015 brings you peace and joy.

[Hidden]

That must have been an awful time for you love and you have my sympathies. It's never right to lose a child is it? You never forget. x

[Hidden]

I lost my twin boys,in 1968,time does heal,but every now & then,the memories pop up,but somehow I'm glad they do,if that makes sense!

Anyway love,enjoy your memories of your Heather,on her Birthday xxx

[Lyd12 in reply to Hidden]

so sorry you lost your twins

there was a family near me that lost one of their twins, and my friend encouraged me to go and see them. It was painful. And the surviving twin was so tiny and such a worry, being cared for at home. times have changed so much.

[bulpit]

Oh Lyd, How very Sad, had she been born today she would almost certainly have been fine, Thank God things are so much better now,Regards Bulpit

[Lyd12 in reply to bulpit]

the health service gets a lot of criticism so it's good to remember how far it has come. I had pleurisy as a baby and my father could barely afford a home visit from a nurse, ...

[Lyd12 in reply to bulpit]

Hi Bulpit

I was so sorry to read about your husband. I hope Christmas was not too difficult for you this community is great for letting us give voice to our feelings knowing they will be sympathetically heard. Best wishes Iris x

[bikergrove]

Having lost a child myself i know how you feel and although sometimes the memory of them can be so painful, it is normal that you will remember them. Life can be so cruel sometimes thinking of you and your special memories. xx

[Dragonmum]

My wee brother died aged 3 days in 1947 - I don't believe Mum ever got over it though she lived to the ripe old age of 97. He was a "rhesus" baby and today would have been routinely transfused and would have survived. Every day some new thing is discovered, so there is always hope; I so understand what a shattering blow you suffered and glad you feel able to share with us.

[Lyd12]

I'm sure you know that losing a first baby doesn't mean you love subsequent children any the less. They are even more precious. but some confidence, or trust is lost for a time' you have been hurt badly and it's a hard lesson early in life that bad things can happen to you.

[Hidden]

Strange how we never forget, i lost 5 babies, and always remember on what would have been their birthdays etc. Special thoughts for you, especially at this time of year. Love Sheila Xx

[Lyd12 in reply to Hidden]

How awful, to lose five. Were they miscarriages? Hope you succeeded to have a family. I think I was mentally off balance for a while - found myself looking at prams, and then thinking, what are you doing, they are nothing to do with you.

[Hidden in reply to Lyd12]

Hi Lyd, yes in those days they were classed as miscarraiges, all over 18wks, probably have been ok now. But i am blessed with a son and a daughter plus 2 wonderful stepchildren, my daughter is the youngest at 35 now! How about you? It seems the older i get I can see many benefits for being childless, though we don't realise it at the time! Much Love Sheila Xx

[Lyd12 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Sheila

I have one adopted son, he's 51 now, and then I gave birth to two boys, who are 48 and 44. 3 grandchildren, love my family would not have liked to be childless. I feel very lucky. Iris x

[Hidden in reply to Lyd12]

Brilliant, my daughter is adopted, though my son, who's 43 was born naturally, i can not comprehend loving one more than the other, and i don't expect you can either. We are indeed blessed. Love Sheila Xx

[Lyd12 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Sheila

I don't know if you saw it, but if you search under the heading early Christmas present, you will see a picture I posted re my son and also a photo on a following post.

Hope you find it. love Iris x

[Hidden in reply to Lyd12]

Hi Iris, unfortunately i could'nt find it, my computer skills leave much to be desired! But i'm on a mission to get much more techy, 1 of my resolutions! That is something we CAN do with the dratted COPD. Happy New Year to you, may it be a good 1! Love Sheila Xx

[Lyd12 in reply to Hidden]

sorry about that. I found it and tried to post to you if not I'll send a photo.

[onamission]

The NHS has come along way since then now they help you prepare to say your good bye's taking foot and hand prints, pictures I really feel for anyone who has gone through loosing a child