Rib wanted more men jokes, (lol) so happy to oblige. Enjoy a giggle.
A second joke while I am away....... - Lung Conditions C...
A second joke while I am away.......
Written by
huggs
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75 Replies
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Brill, typical man lol . X Sonia x
helingmic in reply to
OK sonia, Women are more "creative", but they take so long, and the shops are so stuffy and claustrophobic!
huggs in reply to
Hi Sonia, Hee hee hee, I thought it would be safe to post a couple of men jokes while I was safely out of touch. Glad you like it. LOL xxxx 
Jokes for men, or jokes at the expense of men?!!! Not sure yours are what Rib had in mind lol 
Oh No!! Have I picked him up wrong then? Oops, wonder how that happened!! LOL
hugs from Huggs xxxx
Who said that romance is dead, after all he remembered where the shop was.
Too true!! I can actually imagine a similar scenario happening in real life. LOL
hugs from Huggs xxx
Typical woman, always wanting what she can't afford. Every partnership needs a sensible one.
Hi warwickstag,
Well it was Christmas time..... time for dreams to come true. lol
hugs from Huggs xxxx
Well, the same to you Huggs. Actually we have a very equal marriage. I earn it and my wife spends it. xx
Hi warwick, ( abbrev)
That sounds just about right to me!! Soooo glad you have it sussed out. 
Thanks for the hugs,
hugs back to you too lol
Huggs xxxx
I' grinning from ear to ear! keep 'em coming! I mean thanks.
Sara x
Hi butter-fly,
Are you trying to get me hung. lol
Glad you liked it, and look out within a few days......maybe more.
hugs from Huggs xxxx
huggs, Rib is so popular, I had to share this joke with two other men friends! so good. i don't do shopping in shops, I go online, so I can order my food with a cool drink!
brilliant huggs you see,, some men are sensible lol
that was a cracker that one ,, ha ha,,, jimmy xxx
p.s also liked eightyplus,s answer,, clever and witty ,,och just another sensible man ha ha
There you are jimmy, we are not so stereo-typical! Just humans ... like women!
Hi Michael,
you are so right, men are just like humans, oops I meant just human...lol
Good of you guys to take it in the manner intended, as we women get our share of jokes too you know. Just a bit of fun.
hugs from Huggs xxxx
thats right ,, but try telling them that
hope you are well helingmic, glad to see you managing the exercise programme, may you continually improve,, all the very best.
regards jimmy
hah! Jimmy, that's good in theory! I want to. I have this cold. Starting antibiotics, as sputum started to change colour. so have to stop that.
At the gym today, I got fed up with this fellow instructor who turned the record up. I looked on the web. Often the noise in the gym reaches that of a jet plane. 15 minutes of that and your hearing is damaged. I went to tell the boss about this. She understood quite well and went herself to turn the volume right down.
Got fed up with having to move so often from the bike, started coughing too. So I went to the other equipment. Not a very good day for improvement!
I shall try tomorrow. Thanks for encouragement. it's always nice to hear from people who don't mind listening, thanks.
Hi Michael,
Maybe you should give your body a rest for a couple of days to allow it to recover from your cold and infection. I know its very tempting to plod on, but if the exercise is making you cough more.......?
You know best how you feel though, but I have learned through bitter experience when I push myself when I have an infection I end up worse in the long run. Everybody is different though, and you know your own body best.
Maybe a good rest tonight will make a difference.
Feel better soon,
hugs from Huggs xxx
it sounds as though it was a bit much today, helingmic,, just like the programme i am on, some good days, some not so good days,, at least you give it your best shot, hopefully you will find tomorrow better,, wish you luck ,, jimmy
Thursday update. I went to the gym today and did my tide easying it up a bit: 30 minutes and 2.80 miles ( not quite 5 miles - 5K) but at least I did it.
Still coughing, but I've taken AB Clarithromycin. I'm on a repeat prescription for those, so I can taken them as needed, as now!
Have a good evening, Mic
Hi Michael,
Glad you eased up a little today with your work out.
Hope you feel better.
hugs from Huggs xxx 
Thank you Huggs, They are tenacious little buggers! But I am even more so :-). I'll get them eventually!
Hi Michael,
Good!! Maybe you should continue to ease up on the exercise a bit, just so your body gets a change to recover without the extra coughing that exercise brings on.
Keep trying to catch them!!
hugs from Huggs xxxx
Not done any exercise during Friday, Saturday and tomorrow. Tpmprrpw, I'm going to church in the morning and the evening because it's a big day. We've got a new vicar and he wants us to sing an anthem/motet by Thomas Tallis. I found this rather exciting. I hope I'm not the only bass to sing!.There will be the bishop, the archdeacon and a whole procession.and the vicar will only be part time!
Hi Michael,
It certainly does sound like a big day tomorrow. Hope all goes well and enjoy yourself.
Is that Church of England?
hugs from Huggs
tomorrow went splendidly., apart from the rain. yes it's Church of England. Our church was built in 1296, rebuilt in the 19 th century. The bad thing about it is that we, the singers from Canterbury Christ Church University and our choir had to process from the hall where we robed ourselves to the church along a little winding path in the pouring rain, the wind and the darkness.
The bishop of Dover, his archdeacon, the rector and all th clergy from the Whitstable team, including a Roman Catholic priest from the Catholic churches welcomed our new vicar. This was a glorious evening. We sang hymns and a motet by Thomas Tallis called "If ye love me"
youtube.com/watch?v=ihhHn6r...
Unfortunately, at the end we had to retrace ours steps to the hall in the pouring rain. I was invited to the party not far from there. But I thought, I'd go home, together with robe and surplice and wash the lot!
A lovely evening indeed.
Hi Michael,
Sounds lovely, but a pity about the rain. Must have been a wonderful experience to go through.
I will find it on youtube, I hope, because your link didn't work.
As long as you enjoyed the evening, that is the main thing. The church itself sounds amazing, and must be beautiful inside and out.
hugs from Huggs xxx
The motet I posted is not us on You Tube. it's the New York polyphonic. on YouTube.
Listen, hare you using Chrome? I have been, but the sound from You Tube doesn't wrok I complained and only received a sort of garbled message which didn't help! I am with Slimjet. This is a little browser that works like Chrome. Only you can hear You tube on it. I used it extensively to rehearse my piece. I've used the bass part only (my range) and this new York polyphony for the context.
I couldn't take videos from the service,as I was in the choir itself! Don't have a mobile phone, . My only camera is a big Canon, rather not use it in the pouring rain!
But I've given you a good flavour I hope. Take it with garlic,
hi mic, sorry to here you've been unwell, i have been much the same the last few days. my thursday session was a disaster, but i still made it for the last 55 mins, [its usually 10,30 till 1pm] i had mistakenly thought i had a second oxygen portable cylinder , but unfortunately it was an empty one, so i only had a three quarter full one, but phoned and explained, [i got my delivery on friday] but managed a few light exercises, and relaxation. i think they were pleased to see me,,,,,,as i didnt get thrown out
best regards my friend,, hope you feel better by now,,,jimmy
Oh I hope your oxygen is sorted out.
I am on Clarithromycin at the moment. sputum is still dodgy and I feel so raucous and dry at night. BUT, I don't want the bug to be left alone. Wnet to the gym this afternoon doing the repeat of 5th week C25K. I had to reduce the speed, but not the level, as I was getting too short of breath, still carried on though and finished it successfully. Brr! I'd not like to practice so late in the evening!
my oxygen is sorted out now mic,
but i'm afraid my sputum seems a bit like yours,and the nights as well !! but i haven't resorted to the emergency steroids or antibiotics as yet, but monitoring my situation all the time,,
i will see how it goes next day or two,, then maybe phone doctor if no better,,
your doing really well mic, i admire you a lot,, but you still need to watch,,, your a bit like me mic stubborn as a mule and wont give in,,, best of luck mic,, jimmy
Oh Jimmy, don't take too long togo on antibiotics. We are vulnerable. I have pseudomonas as a permanent resident in me! I used to wait, then I had to be promptly sent to hospital to have massive intravenous doses of Ceftazadine, as I am now allergic to Gentomycin which makes me deaf. If mucus is yellow green, AB is highly recommended. Take care, as you need to do so.
i know your right in what you say mic, but i was doing fine for a wee while,, my sputum seems to clear as the day goes on,, but i know i'm not quite myself at the moment. i had been on steroids ,antibiotics and hospitals almost continually for over a year, and thought i was doing well to be off them,, but if needs must i will start them and phone the doctor,
but having an early night tonight,, thanks mic.... jimmy
Hope you can sleep tight.
thought i would mic,, bed at 10 30 !!! up at 1am,,,,but feel ok,, just cant sleep,, this is just happening of late,,?
anyway lying there like an egyptian mummy catheter out one side of the bed, oxygen tubing other side,,,, and having to "sit up" in bed,,, cant even toss and turn, oh well i,ll just have a cuppa,,
well i wont pee the bed jimmy
Although I no longer have oxygen due to my obstinate improvement at the gym (!), I have to sit against a frame, adapted with three cushions. At first, it felt weird. But in this way, I can breathe and not clog up with sputum. I did try to turn to the left, but didn't feel too comfortable that way.
I do wake up at 4 am. I used to have a hot chocolate. But now, I have my bottle of Caledonian naturally carbonated water. I gtry to stay put after pee. I listen to Classic FM for 20 minutes and hope to doze off. I'm amazed how quick the time passes from 4 till 6.30 am! I feel like sleeping just at 6.30 am when it's time for me to get up! Ah well, so it goes. take care, Jimmy, Mic
i was hoping for that as well mic. i have worked so hard to try if i could improve,,, to get rid of this long term oxygen,, but over the last few days was quite bad,,and now against my own judgement,, its back to the antibiotics and steroids, i suppose i knew that a few days ago,,, never mind i've been worse,,
isnt it strange how you become tired when its time to get up thanks mic,,, jimmy
Oh poor you. I really feel for you. Yes, I've been desperately tired. The I just sleep, nothing else to do! I do hope you get over this nasty bout. Be brave and never give up. (That's what Barbra Xtreisand used to sing, never give up.
hi mic, yes that was a great song barbra streisand sang,,,,
but i am a bit better now mic,but like you very tired and sleeping at the wrong times,,, it seems to bother me in waves , its when this phlegm gatherers, then my breathing goes a bit wonky [a bit like me ] and its hard work bringing it up,, never mind mic,,, as you say, "never give up", i admire you a lot, and hope your feeling ok now,, regards jimmy
Jimmy. What I do at the moment, in teh morning and in the evening, I rinse my mouth and gargle and rinse my nose with salted water, quite strong; but it gets some gunk outand I feel better for it. I'm still with AB, but I feel good.
Can I refer you to the 8 pieces of brocade (I do them every morning too, takes about 1/2 hour)
Here's an explanation:
taichivillage.org/?page_id=662
And here's a nicce girl to show you how to!
youtube.com/watch?v=DhsU1qL...
It gets the mucus out in the morning. It gives you energy - did me anyway! Have a, gentle, go. No need to force the exercises down your body.do them slowly and STOP when you get tired. It will do you good!
hi mic, i've just been looking at the 8 brocades, exercises, they are very good, i,ll look more on that site!!. we get something slightly similar at the healthy lifestyle course, off course thats only one day a week, but i try keep them up all week myself. that was very thoughtful of you posting these links, i thank you for that. i cant get the link on utube, but i,ll find it.
at the moment i feel this would be the main one for me, as, for some reason , this last week or so, ive really been bad with this gunk, its very hard work trying to keep it clear, then no sooner i seem to have cleared it. then it builds up again,,, i've just spent the last hour working on it, using the salt water nebs etc. you've been a great help mic, i appreciate that very much. ,,, jimmy
Hi Jimmy,
So pleased that you enjoyed it. lol Seeing that you like it so much and you guys are so sensible, I will look out some more especially for you. I have been away all day on the mainland and snowed under with emails/messages, so it may be a couple of days..........................but watch out, I will be back. lol ha ha ha
hugs from Huggs xxxxxx
Hi Michael,
To be honest I was just using Rib's name in vain, so to speak. lol Hope he doesn't mind, but glad you like the joke and are sharing it around.
I don't do shopping in shops much either, mainly because there aren't many here!
Take care,
hugs from Huggs xxx
Huggs, I suppose fishing is more your style?
Hi Michael,
Fishing??? Oh no, don't like to hurt the poor wee fishes. I like winding you guys up a little. lol You all take it so well.
I like taking photos as well. Sadly, cannot get to the places I want to go, as they are remote and involve a bit of hill climbing, hiking and hacking your way through brush. If you are free Michael, you are most welcome to do it for me.
Hope your cold isn't too bad, and that First Defence worked its magic.
hugs from Huggs xxxxxx
This morning, I thought I'd start the AB, because the colour of sputum doesn't please me. I'm not going to wait till it darkens and I feel so grotty that I have to phone an ambulance to take me to hospital. On the news, they say that hospitals don't like people booking for A and E. They earn less money for that service!
By the way, you asked me if I'd got the stormy suit. Yes I have. I hope you get some climbing gears, so you can take that sumpruous photo from the peak!
Hi Michael,
That's a good idea to start with the antibiotics as it has been a few days now I think. As you say, no point in waiting until you feel worse.
Believe it or not Michael, but in my late teens until mid twenties I did rock climbing, hill walking, trekking and all that stuff. I still have my first pair of hiking boots. Of course they will never be used again.........well, I suppose I could put them on one day to go to the Co-operative and see if anyone notices. lol
I would near a chairlift these days to get to where I would like to go, which is remote and inaccessible unless you can trek up and down over hills and mud, woods and brush. I do know a hill I can get to however, by road. Its not the same though, but if it snows this winter I will go as I can get wonderful views from their, but the weather has to be just right.
The winter so far has been mild here, but a bit colder on the mainland. I bought winter woollies in a summer sale and have had no use for them yet. Mind you we have had plenty of storms, even this early. The fun and games will start with my appointments over the new year and beyond, as I am reliant on the weather and patient transport, so have to hope for the best.
Hope you feel better soon, and take care.
hugs from Huggs xxxx
Huggs, you are a sweet. I’d love to hug you in your sweater!
When I was younger, I went with the YMCA, fell walking in the Lake District. Only I hired the wrong boots, far too small! I did climb up with the other to the top. But I got sick because my feet were so constrained. I got my boots off, and got help down the hill, bare foot –that was delightful actually. A story to remember.
Coughed at the gym. Got fed up with loud music, told the boss who turned the volume right down. Got fed up to get off bike so often. Did a few more on the other equipment. My driver did his exercises at the gym too.. So we got home where I had a sleep rather tired.
Hug in jumper!
Hi Michael,
Sending you a series of virtual hugs in my various new sweaters! lol
Ha ha I misread part of your answer and thought you said your feet were constipated, and I thought to myself, what on earth has he done?
Imagine hiring wrong sized boots, oh dearie me. I make no further comment on that.
I answered your gym events on another post, which you may have read by this time, so will not repeat myself again.
take care,
hugs in jumper to Michael,
Huggs xxxxxxxx
yes, read all your other comments avidly, hehehe! Have a good night on this very dark night. keep warm on your stormy island. Do you hear the wind whistle? I have Classic FM on and its warm and cosy here! I send you a spark of light from my fire!
Hi Michael,
They were very serious comments Michael, and not to be taken lightly, hee hee hee
The weather has been lovely here today, calm, dry and sunny with a little chill.
I am not wishing cold weather on us.......but I did stock up on winter woollies. So maybe the weather fairy will send us some snow for Christmas.
Thanks for your spark.
Here is some of mine........
hugs from Huggs xxxxx
Ha, I have to watch what I post, will get my fingers burnt.
jimmyw123 in reply to
my fingers are like hot cinders lol ,,,,jimmy
No, no malk, you don't have to worry, lol, the ladies will keep an eye open though. ha ha
hugs from Huggs xxx
see what you've started huggs,, us poor men
huggs, a laugh is the best medicine, good lass,,
i see your going over to the mainland,,,, just watch where you go [mens toilet remember ,,,,,
hugs to huggs from cheeky jimmy xxxxxx
I know Jimmy, I admit it, I am terrible!! Every once in a while something comes over me, you know? LOL
Ha ha.... I only do it, because I know you take it in the spirit it is intended. Just a laugh.
Oh help Jimmy, are you never going to forget the mens toilet incident, ?
No, you aren't are you,? och well, I don't mind, at least it gave you a laugh, but you know I don't even remember posting it, so I will need to have a look and see if I told you the full story of it.......or just the part that I ended up there.
I have been to the mainland successfully, avoided the men's toilets. It was a different hospital when I ended up in the mens, and the light had gone out in the corridor. hee hee hee I sometimes have a giggle about it, and wonder how the old woman that followed me in ever recovered!!!!
Have you got that job yet? You know the entertainer in chief? I can just see you doing that you know.
Thanks for the hugs my cheeky pal lol
hugs to you, from Huggs xxxxxx
ha ha ha huggs you do make me laugh lol,, but we need a laugh to keep us going
[especially into the mens toilet ,, i,ll need to let you forget that, i remember laughing like mad at the time and still laugh yet at it] aye and the poor old woman that followed you
anyway, glad your back safely from the mainland, with with no mishaps?!!! oh i cant help it huggs still laughing
need to go now, to shops,, a blinken effort but,,, need to go anyway!!!,,,,,,,[to the shops , that is ] [see cant forget it , even if i try :D] its me thats terrible,, or its one as bad as the other lol
but i know you take things in good humor huggs, thats the best way.
ive got my health lifestyle thing tomorrow,, so i will see what mischief i can get up to. [i,ll tell them your joke ] surely that'll get a laugh from them
entertainer in chief jimmy xxxxxxxx
Hi again Jimmy,
You do make me laugh, and you are a right tonic you really are Jimmy, and I love your humour and attitude.
I will have a look later for other jokes, do you want ones at the expense of men? I can do those lol Or I will see what else I can come up with. I can remember a good one about a child arguing with a teacher, which even I can remember. ha ha
Don't worry about the toilets Jimmy, I can take it, and take the mickey out of myself a lot anyway. You have to really, having a good laugh helps cope with all the trials and tribulations, and humour is always good for you.
The patient transport this time was quite quiet this time, as I had laryngitis, and Willie the driver, kept giving me lozenges while cheerfully telling the other's that it wasn't normally so quiet, so they all turned and looked at me, and laughed. I knew them anyway, because it is such a small place. It was a bit bumpy on the boat though, as it was a stand in ferry, and it is nicknamed the bathtub!!
Do you not have anyone to help you with your shopping Jimmy? I know its nice to get out, but if it such an effort? Don't want you getting worse, if you can get help sometimes.
You take good care Jimmy and enjoy yourself tomorrow. In a little while I will look out a couple of jokes for you.
hugs from Huggs xxxxx
hi huggs your a star lol,, i get the wiltshire farm foods, but theres always something to get at the shops,, i get jane in on a wednesday morning to do the hoovering, she brings me two big milks [for my porridge lol ] also the bottled water, shes really good to me, her mother stays a few doors from me she has severe copd as well, so jane knows what shes doing bless her i don't know what i would have done without her, shes been coming every wednesday for 7 years [imagine that poor girl putting up with me, all that time lol ]
but i manage ok huggs thanks,,,just the usual ups and downs lol,, best regards ,,jimmy xxx
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