Four idiot jokes! Two are allegedly t... - Lung Conditions C...

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Four idiot jokes! Two are allegedly true!

huggs profile image
15 Replies

1. Advice for idiots from page 16 of the HP "Environmental, Healthy & Safety Handbook for employees:

"Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes.

2. My neighbour works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field

call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the

branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a

fire downtown?"

3. My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for

"minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.

4. Police interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connected it with wires to a

photocopying machine. The message, "he is lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy

button each time they thought the suspect was lying. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect

confessed.

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huggs
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15 Replies

Loved them,think I could work out which 2 were true,lol! xxx

huggs profile image
huggs in reply to

Hi Wendells, I think they could all be true! You can just imagine the scenes. My favourite is number 4. hugs xx

I think I can too Wendell, brilliant huggs, hugs....lol ;-)

huggs profile image
huggs in reply to

Hi Poems, I think they are all true. Number 4 gets my vote as funniest, and I can just imagine the scene taking place.! hugs xx

mustcarryon profile image
mustcarryon

Fantastic. Are they for real?

huggs profile image
huggs in reply tomustcarryon

Hi mustcarryon, I have been told that two are true, but personally I think they could all be true.! My favourite is number 4.

Offcut profile image
Offcut

There was a program on the TV that showed a criminal saying "You could not have my fingerprints because I was wearing gloves when I broke in" the fact it was being filmed and taped did not faze him.

huggs profile image
huggs in reply toOffcut

Hi Offcut, That is brilliant! Love it. Sometimes the real ones are the best! hugs xx

undine profile image
undine

lol thank you have heard the last before and believe it to be true x

huggs profile image
huggs in reply toundine

HI undine, pleased you enjoyed it. Do you really think number 4 is true? Its so off the wall, that it could well be. Its my favourite one. hugs xx

undine profile image
undine in reply tohuggs

Hi Huggs, yes think is true saw two American policemen tell this story on TV - needless to say think it was on an edition of 'America's most stupid crooks' or something xx

huggs profile image
huggs in reply toundine

Hi undine, hee hee hee. It would have to be America! I can't imagine them getting away with it in this country. Wouldn't it be great if that was all it took to get a confession from a criminal!! I wonder if its posted on you tube or something? I love it anyway, no matter where it comes from. Take care, hugs xx

helingmic profile image
helingmic

the colander worked! it tickled me to a laughter! Thank you!

huggs profile image
huggs in reply tohelingmic

Hi Mick, Yes, that's my favourite one as well. According to undine that one is true. I can just picture the scene in a police interrogation room and some hapless criminal believing it all.! I am still laughing at that one. Take care, hugs xx

Suzy6 profile image
Suzy6

No not No4 Huggs. The copier developed a paper misfeed and jammed AGAIN. So he is freed.

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