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Copd 52% every time I have a breathing "do"I am having incontanance I try not to panic and get so embarrassed I avoid going out,please help

Softwabbit profile image
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On a brighter note, Thank God for Tena Lady.

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Softwabbit
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25 Replies

Softwabbit, for me It,s the other way round, I,m running to the toilet. Earlier on I had huge panic attack, out of nowhere, I hate them. Take care

Softwabbit profile image
Softwabbit in reply to

Ty philbal haven't got that far yet just water so far, bless you

in reply toSoftwabbit

Take care, post again

Softwabbit, good to know, post again sometime ..

mommalou profile image
mommalou

tena lady my best friend x

Softwabbit profile image
Softwabbit in reply tomommalou
Puffthemagicdragon profile image
Puffthemagicdragon

When you are finding it hard to breathe the brain shuts down what it thinks is " unessential " body functions like the muscles you use to stop you weeing and pooing at the wrong times. Like you say Softwabbit try and relax. I try to make sure I am " empty " if I think I'm going to be out for a bit. The best thing is to try and rest before you reach the breathless stage. I know that's obvious but some tend to forget sometimes.

Toci profile image
Toci in reply toPuffthemagicdragon

Correct, I lost my shiver reflex some time ago and this was how it was explained to me - a shut down of non-essentials. .

Softwabbit profile image
Softwabbit in reply toPuffthemagicdragon

Puffthemagicdragon/Toci/Longlungs I am thnkfull for all your advice and info as to be honest with you I never thought in a million years I would need,this blasted thing jumped up and bit me on the backside over a yr ago when the weakness and breathing started and had the test then nurse put me on Zyban to stop smoking because she said I had the lungs of a 94 yr old,but me being the stupid idiot I am put it all down to only getting started on a diet and everything would be back to normal,how very very wrong I was,So now I have to figure out who to see and what to do to enable me to get another 20 yrs on this earth and with good folk like you I am sure I will have a fighting chance.So I shall be boring the socks of you all by asking questions and my motto is "Ask a question and you may look a fool for 5 minuets ,But Don't ask and you will be a fool all your life"

siestasue profile image
siestasue in reply toPuffthemagicdragon

Puff.....your post was so interesting....about how the body shuts down to concentrate on important functions. I always thought that carrying my shopping indoors and nearly weeing myself was because of a weak bladder, but l now realise it is because l am so breathless whilst doing the carrying. Also I have been in company when I have felt SOB and then can hardly make it to the loo. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THAT INFO.

longlungs profile image
longlungs

They are horrible moments indeed softwabbit as puffthemagicdragon says we have to try and relax,which is not always very easy,we all have our own ways of coping, some listen to music or talking books anything that distracts you from that awful panic feeling.I wish I could say do this and it will never happen again,i cant though my doc gave me some medication for help with panic attacks which do definitely help.My problem is i start to get in a state before eg. if im about to go up stairs sometimes I start thinking i cant make it im too puffy which is exactly what happens I start to over breathe and before Ive tried one step all logic as gone right out the window and a full on panic has arrived along with 'oh no ineed to pee now' ! My son watched me one day and said 'mum you are so silly why are you breathing like that,when you do your exercises you really get out of breath but never panic,calm down' he was right of course no i cant fly up the stairs by any means but slowly slowly I can without all the panic malarky,so I now think of his words especially when im on the stairs.I do hope you can find something that distracts you enough to calm down and continue on with what you were doing. :) Janexx

derrylynne profile image
derrylynne

This is a problem little talked about with copd. I used to get this when trying to rush. And my blood oxygen sats dropped below 90. Since I have been on oxygen it is much less of a problem but nowadays if I get the urge I turn up the o2 a notch for a minute. But of course we are not all on oxygen. Before using oxygen supplement I would stop where I was. And relax as much as I could, and the need to poo would go off. It is fair to say I was terrified of messing myself. As said it is the bodies system letting go of some resources to manage others. The only advice I can give is don't rush. Give plenty of time. Go slow. And if you get the need don't start rushing in a panic as that will make things worse. Take deep as you can easy breaths and think nice thoughts till the urge goes off. It will as you body regains control and resources. Not an easy problem to deal with but I am sure with time you will.

mustcarryon profile image
mustcarryon

I know the feeling. Tena my best friend.

CornishBrian profile image
CornishBrian

If you look up the Bowell and Bladder foundation...or it might be the otherway round....you will find some useful exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor. I would go and see your local continence nurse....usually self referall. They will tell you about stress incontinence...the coughing bouts damage our pelvic floors..I am almost totally incontinent now but have to grin and bear it sort of. Your continence tam can also arrange a supply of pads to suit which saves a bit of money too.

Puffthemagicdragon profile image
Puffthemagicdragon

I'm a bit like derrylynne and relax until the feeling goes. I haven't really panicked for over a year now since I had a messy problem at work once. Lucky enough no one was about. Now, if I do start feeling a bit edgy, I relax. The best way I do this is by thinking that if I don't relax I'll end up in a bit of a mess. I sure relax then !

PeterK1 profile image
PeterK1

Hi there,

As said already, not much talked about and brave of you to post, well done. Your motto is great I like it a lot !

I went through this embarrassing experience when I had the 6 weeks of cancer treatment, refusing to go out because of it, then forcing myself to go out and getting court short in a shop with no loo's, and thanks to all the vandals these days public toilets are few and far between.

What helped me gain control again came via the help of a cancer nurse, ( when I was brave to enough to actually tell her about it ).

Pelvic floor exercises she said, Now I had heard of this for ladies after a certain operation but never before for men. She explained that it's exercise for all the muscles in that area, man or woman, not hard to do ! can be done while sitting watching the tv or just sitting or laying in bed. For the dribbles she said, drink plenty, when you need to go for a pee go but while on the loo use control to stop and start at will ! again it's exercise and not hard to do.

So thanks to this wonderful nurse I learnt and retaught my body and now through breathing problems, and other things I can control things pretty much 100%. I go out, I no longer get scared about it, I no longer use pads and life is a lot less embarrassing and easier to cope with.

Hope you get sorted soon, SSBD Peter xx

I was going through many tena lady pads..For several months...now I am not as I must be more in control ...keep bladder emptier than I used to when I could go all day without the loo. And consciously breathing more helpfully when going upstairs etc.

Gosh thank you softwabbit for posting this. I have lived with almost total incontinence for 18 months now and thought I was the only one. Wonderful advice as well - I'm not going to suffer in silence anymore!

onamission profile image
onamission

Coughing, sneezing all lead to the same thing I use simple linctus to stop the cough I told my GP she never even looked at me as it is a common thing that goes hand in hand with COPD

hopetorun profile image
hopetorun

hi softwabbit i try and keep my bladder as empty as possible especially if my chest is not good and always takea spare pair of pants to work!

FarmerD profile image
FarmerD

Thank goodness it,s not just me.I just try and go before I go if you get my drift.Good luck D.

carolg1 profile image
carolg1

I should have shares in tena ladies I would be rich by now haha, it is difficult and embarrassing but it will pass !!

stay well and just worry about yourself , because I bet like me you dont .

Carol

MarieW-F profile image
MarieW-F

I too struggle with this (still do occasionally when exercising) but the physio I have had has helped me enourmously. Its certainly down to low sats and panic. Horrible feeling.

butter-fly profile image
butter-fly

Thank you for posting about this problem so many of us have but don't want to talk about because we are too embarrassed. Lots of good helpful advice given too.

Since the spinal fractures last year I also have this problem and it's good to be able share this with others.

Apart from the explanations given I think also it's because our muscles have gone all floppy and weak. In my case I wasn't able to do much of anything for a few months so even standing in the shower or walking from one room to another was enough to almost bring on a the need to wee or possibly even worse. Up until then coughing or sneezing or even bouts of breathlessness wasn't a problem.

Mentioned this to the physiotherapist during the recent PR and she advised tensing and relaxing the pelvic and stomach muscles...I think it might just be helping a little and hope that it might help others too.

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