We had a baby boy born June 2022, My wife started having mild symptoms in February 2023, got treatment for postnatal depression, until April 2023, she stopped the medication as she felt well. Slowly stated paranoia, agitation, talking same things again and again, thinking her son is a incarnation of a GOD, she would not accept that she got Postpartum Psychosis, and would not take medication, the whole family tried talking to her, she would not listen to no one. It's been a year now with no luck so not sure what to do as without her consent she would not get any help. She is giving threat of divorce if I force her to go for any treatment.
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Jinfor
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Welcome to the forum. My name is Ellie, I had postpartum psychosis in 2011 after the birth of my son. I’m one of APP’s national peer support coordinators.
I’m so sorry your wife is not well and has been struggling for so long. It sounds like you and other family members have tried to get help. It must be such a stressful and worrying time for you.
It is important that your wife does get help in order to recover . It’s really important you get help for her quickly, particularly if you feel her symptoms are severe and you’re worried for her safety.
Information about how to get help for postpartum psychosis is on our website here:
You can contact her GP or if you’re very worried for her safety you should call emergency services, for example 999.
I wonder if you can write down some of her symptoms, and the things she says, with dates, and take this to a doctor? Perhaps the previous doctor she received help from for the postnatal depression? Perhaps you could take someone else with you as well who can raise the concerns with you?
I really hope you can get your wife some help soon.
She went to GP number of occasions with relative and a friend, they kept giving her antidepressants , refusing me to interfere without her consent, there has been number of phone calls to 111 been logged asking for help, they refused to help without her consent, I even got ambulance out last year, they took her and just discharged her with sleeping pills, these has gone on for nearly on and off since February last year so in her mind she hates me and demanding divorce as she thinks I am the one trying to prove that she got mental illness. Her friends came from across the country, created a WhatsApp group to help her and convince her to go private and get some help quickly but she won't listen to no one, her Dad, brother and sister spoke to her nearly every day, crying to her her to get some help, she would not listen to no one. Even her friends gave up. I spoke to adult social services, even they spoke to her and they gave up in the end as she would not answer them or tell them that it's me who is causing all the troubles and she want a divorcee.
She keep repeating,
1) She doesn't know how much time she got left to live?
2) Her son is incarnation of a GOD and she is a demon so she will be in hell for eternal life
3) She will come up with new date every week where she will tell us that one of us will be dead and police will blame her for that and she will be given capital punishment
4) she want to live in separate apartment as she is searching for GOD and doesn't want to live with us,
5) She did try to kill herself last year, when I called the ambulance since then she is scared of police , ambulance and doctors as she is worried she will be abducted and put in jail and won't see her son again.
6) She left her job she had it for seven years because she thinks that she is being prosecuted and everyone around her are collecting evidence for court case
7) We had to take all the blink cameras out as she kept complaining about being filmed and evidence been collected for a court case.
8) We had to break all the locks on the door as she will lock herself out saying she doesn't want to come out of a room and might harm herself.
I know we are speaking on the phone later, which I hope might help.
It is shocking to read about all your wife's symptoms, and the amount of times and various ways you and relatives and friends have tried to get her help yet you haven't been able to find the appropriate and meaningful help that can make a difference. I am so sorry you have had to experience this, you must be so worried, and exhausted too.
I wonder if at any point did any services (GP, social care services) ever refer her to a mental health team? It sounds like she needs specialist psychiatric help, ideally a team that specialises in psychosis, and can recognise and treat it as that, and also know how to support someone who is resistant to getting help, or recognising that they are unwell.
I know I have signposted in an email already to the early intervention in psychosis team in your area. I wonder if that might be a good place to go to for support, and advice? They will be specialised in psychosis and will know about how to deal with someone who doesn't feel they need or want the help.
I know personally that it is very hard to tell when you are poorly yourself, that you are unwell, as the delusions feel so real, rather than the symptoms of an illness. It is therefore quite normal for people experiencing psychosis to feel they don't need mental health support, yet services should understand that and still intervene to support.
Thinking of you, and looking forward to speaking with you later.
I have rang them multiple times, they would not do anything unless it comes form her GP and I even put in a complaint with her GP when they cancelled the appointment and would not rebook unless she will call them checking everyday if there is a urgent appointment available, this was couple of months ago, I haven't heard back about my complaint from GP surgery and now she is reluctant call them. As according to her she is fine, it's the GOD punishing her for being a demon.
It was good to talk with you this afternoon. I hope it will help writing all your concerns and observations to your GP, early intervention in psychosis team and social care. You are doing so well to keep persisting in getting her help, it is shocking how services haven’t been able to help her so far.
Stay in touch and let us know how you get on. Thinking of you, take care
I am so sorry about your despair and struggles throughout the last 2 years.
It is quite common that PPP sets in short after the baby is born (approx. 2 weeks, as it was in my case), but of course there are other scenarios where diagnosis of this traumatising illness is much later.
I do agree with Ellie that evidence need to be brought forward in order to establish a diagnosis by a health professional/collective of a mental health team. However, it is a very difficult situation to convince somebody, if they do not recognise their own state of mental health.
My partner was not listen to initially, but eventually a midwife came in to check on me. In addition a dear friend/surrogate mum spent time with me (somebody I trusted) and finally the MH crisis team. By then I was willing to be sectioned.
Nevertheless, there is a fine divide of level of illness and whether it is acute. In addition your wife could be suffering with mental health issues which may not be related to PPP.
Your wife needs to be able to confine to somebody she can trust. Hope this helps a bit.
Sorry to hear you are going through this. I called the mental health crisis team when my wife was at her worst (i.e. about to harm baby). They won't attend unless it is an emergency but it is helpful for a professional to see your wife's delusions and hear what she is saying first hand so that they can signpost her. My wife ended up being sectioned because of how serious things were.
Even if not acute, but ongoing, persist with what you have been doing and again try and get someone out to see your wife in her comfortable, safe environment at home. That should then lead to the right referrals.
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