Recovery

[Bumblebeeee]

How long until you felt you had recovered? It’s been nearly 2 years now and I don’t feel anywhere near recovered. The psychosis side of things stopped a while ago, but I still don’t look after myself or wear makeup etc. I just want to be back to normal. I first got unwell after my daughter who is now 4 nearly 5! But was just starting to feel better when I got pregnant again whilst on the coil with my daughter who’s now nearly 2. I just feel like it’s gone on way too long 😩

[Lilybeth Volunteer]

Hi Bumblebeeee

I've replied under your "Music" post so hope that's ok?

Thinking of you .... take good care of yourself. ❤️

[Florence83]

You've had a lot to deal with so it's understandable you find it hard to get back to yourself, it completely wipes you out, what are your doctor's saying about it?

[Florence83 in reply to Florence83]

Diet really helps me to feel more motivated and less sluggish, when I eat a lot of rubbish I become extremely lethargic and during this I've made time to do a bit of exercise which I don't normally get round to doing, the body coach on YouTube has some good workouts, don't know if you've seen pe with Joe, something the kids can do with you and it's a really good workout, he's got 5 minute ones which are good if you can't face doing a whole workout, good to do before getting in the shower, just jumping around for 5 minutes gives you a boost, sometimes i can't face the thought of doing a longer workout so these are good for those days, maybe just try to do 5 minute workout today if you can, another thing i do if I'm feeling lethargic just jump and do 50 star jumps even just that can give you a boost,I said I was gonna do it every morning while the kettle was boiling but I forget to do it lol xxxx

[Nicolaba]

Hi Bumblebee, I would say everyone’s journey is different and how long it takes could be as long as a piece of string but you will get there. I read a great book called self care revolution by Suzy reading I really recommend a book about self care to give you ideas of how to take take for yourself. Looking after yourself and nurturing yourself is so important. Perhaps start with an extra five minutes each day to do something for your self like put on lipstick. It must be hard with the backdrop of what’s happening in the world,Thinking of you.

[Maria_at_APP Moderator]

Hi Bumblebeeee, I am sorry you have been feeling so low for such a long time. And having to entertain 2 wee ones of those ages at home is not easy at all. So give yourself a massive recognition. You are doing an incredible job under very trying circumstances. And you are an amazing mum and a very caring person.

For me these past few weeks have taken a toll on my mental health. I have had issues with sleep that are always my trigger. And I started using daylio which is an app for mood tracking. Maybe when things get a bit closer to normal you could think of an appointment with your gp and work together on a review of medication or counselling service?

Hang in there, we are all here for you and write when you feel like, don't think you need to write all the time

[Pikorua Volunteer]

Hi Bumblebeeee,

I am sorry you feel under the weather.

I believe comparing and contrasting with others and work on expectations creates a lot of pressure.

However, exchanging ideas what suits the individual maybe useful for you, too.

It is all about trial and error and finding the recovery path which is the unique one for you.

You move on in life, you make memories and the trauma is going to fade. I can speak from experience like so many mums, who have made their foot prints on our APP forum.

I always reflect upon my own challenges and my recovery was just at the beginning stages after 2 years. " I want to be back to normal", what is normal, how do you define normal???

I was a full time lecturer working in higher education, now I am an artist, a full time mum and do a lot of volunteering. My life before and after. Because of my mental health I would not be able to go back to my previous life nor do I want to...you develop and continue learning, you rejuvenate...

Unfortunately I was so poorly and have had a very traumatising time in a mixed gender psychiatric hospital. I was put into isolation and my treatment just can be summarised as "unreasonable and inhumane" - the hospital was "refurbished" after I was discharged. My partner saved my life after 39 horrendous days. He brought me back to life.

My dad and mum in law died in 2013 & 2015, both under very difficult circumstances. In addition I was living with Bipolar 1, which was undiagnosed. Because of the ongoing trauma I never slept much for 5 yrs until I found APP.

Life is full of challenges and circumstances. External influences make us powerless, but we can learn to empower ourselves in order to gain inner strengths and will power.

- isolation or social distancing at this moment gives us time to self reflect, like EmiMum tracking is a good idea, which helps to implement changes in the long run and informs health professionals on your symptoms and pattern of moods

- journalising is a good way, and even if you just simplify, by doing a weekly planner and evaluate maybe just with smiley faces or level 1-10, in the way how you have accomplished something...there are loads of apps to chose from or you even could find ideas on Pinterest

- teaching and learning with your children could be recorded, by creating a scrap book … with home schooling my son and I write a daily diary

- I am not sure whether you have a garden, we certainly watch our little world go round, meaning observing nature, taking pictures of insects, butterflies and loads more, we plant and pot a lot, turn soil and play games outdoors

- exercising once a day and trying to be nutritious helps to balance your mental health

- pursuing something you enjoy whilst your children are being occupied...I make sure I meditate, cycle and try to have some time out, I love painting and gardening

- I use alternative methods for coping strategies such as yoga, regular meditation, continuous chakra balancing etc.

I hope this helps a bit, try to live with the moment and not with the past, you can not change it, because you are changing and you are moving on...it is just part of life...you mature and tune in...

Wishing you well, health and happiness.

x

[Bumblebeeee in reply to Pikorua]

Thank you for all your replies. I think yesterday something was triggered by a song I heard. Which reminded me of being in hospital. And it seemed to send me into a spiral. I feel abit better today. Isn’t it strange how one thing can trigger off something and it sends you spiralling into a bad place!!x

[Kat_at_APP Volunteer in reply to Bumblebeeee]

Absolutely recognise this feeling! Being in hospital was such a strange, traumatic time that lots of different things can bring memories flooding back. I’m glad you’re starting to feel better. Pikorua has written such a comprehensive reply that I can’t add very much to it. I think as she says it’s almost impossible to define what “normal” is. For me, I just enjoy the feeling of feeling (if that makes sense!). So the worst bit of recovering from the illness was often the numbness - not feeling anything at all, being completely closed off from the world and from other people. As I got better I started to feel things again - even just simple stuff like laughing at the tv or being interested in an article on the news... Kx

[new-baby]

Hi Buzz, after I'd had several episodes I suddenly realised that I was in a cycle of repetition. Talking to the MHT helped me lots and I'm still feeling psychotic sometimes but take something for it and also try and work out what I so upset about. It's like my thoughts were coming into my head unbidden. Keep well, Happy Bank Holiday xx

[Lilybeth Volunteer]

Hello Bumblebeeee

I'm glad you felt a bit better today and the replies were helpful. It is strange how something can trigger a bad memory and be upsetting. Only today, many years after my first PP, I had a memory triggered which took me right back to the beginning of my illness, so I understand how hard it can be. There are ups and downs during recovery but you will get there and we are all here for you along the way.

I think being isolated at home is a challenge with little ones. Perhaps one of the days you could snuggle up with your children under the comfort of a blanket to watch a DVD they like?

PP mums are amazing Be kind to yourself and take care. ❤️