I'm new to this site , not long been diagnosed and really struggling just looking for someone who can reassure me there is light at the end of the tunnel.

suffering from voice hallucinations, and suicidal thoughts, and the guilt of being ill when other peoples lives (psychosis apart) is a lot worse than mine.

my partner is great but don't feel he totally understands as hard as he is trying so just looking for someone who has been through this to talk to xx

4 Replies

  • Hello niccie27

    Really pleased you've found the forum as there will be so much support and advice here for you. Are you at home or in a mother and baby unit as you have not long been diagnosed?

    I had PP many years ago but can relate to voice hallucinations which were all very real and frightening to me at the time. I also had suicidal thoughts, feeling not good enough and retreating to my bed as a sanctuary. It's a shame that the gift of having a baby can be tarnished by PP but it's not your fault and you are definitely not on your own. Sometimes it's very hard for partners and family to understand as it is also for us, as it can strike out of the blue.

    I don't know whether you have seen the APP Guides, "Recovery after Postpartum Psychosis" and "Postpartum Psychosis : A Guide for Partners" the link being There is also a brilliant blog, with info and interactions from other mums who have had similar experiences.

    There will be other mums here with more up to date experiences. I can honestly say that with good medical care and support you will completely recover eventually. Do you have a CPN or Health Visitor for support in these early days? We are all here for you and there are also some dads on the forum who might be able to reassure your partner too.

    Take good care and surround yourself with as much support as you can. PP mums are amazing. :)

  • Hi Lilybeth

    thankyou for the warm welcome

    I'm at home but my CPN visits every other day.

    thank you for the pointing me in the direction of the blogs I'll have a read xx

  • Hello niccie27

    I'm glad you have the support of a CPN visiting. I think it's a good way of talking openly about how you feel. I also had delusions which faded with the right medication so I hope you will be reviewed regularly.

    Wrap yourself in the comfort blanket of home and take care. We are all here to lean on.

  • Hi Niccie27,

    You have definitely found the right place. You're going through something that is really tough. There is no guilt or shame in PP. It is in no way your fault that it has happened. Everyone here has been through it too (or knows someone who has), and whilst all our experiences are different, there is a lot in each others stories that we can relate to.

    There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes it can take us months or longer to feel like ourselves again and to be medication free, but it does happen eventually. MY PP was about 9 months ago and while I am still on an anti-psychotic and I am feeling much more like myself now. You will get there, and you'll be a stronger person for what you've been through!

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