i just wrote a whole blog and lost it! doh. anyway i had an upper and lower endoscopy under GA on friday and to be honest it knocked me for six. as you all know life is hard when you suffer with mental health. the enima and the trapped gas after made me panic cos it coused me pain but luckily my mum went with and helped me. the trapped gas nearly made me pass out, they must have used a truck load of something! anyway after they told me i had had a stomach polyp removed which was benign and sent off for testing with the samples from my bottom. my paperwork says i had eight benign stomach polyps, the largest being 6mm which was the one removed.
i am still waiting for the results and am very worried they are not ok. my mum had polyps somewhere on her years ago and she said hers where fine and removed but also remember mum having bad polyps removed after a course of HRT which is what frightens me. i cant talk to my boyfriend about it as he doesnt even know what one is and is not interested in looking into it. i know he has issues at work and has social anxiety but on that note should show some if any compassion......his whole family are like it. dont even know if i should bother with him again to be honest, its been five years and he behaves like its been 5 weeks.
i still feel sore on the inside which makes me worried even more. been quite low since the pre assesment to be honest and havnt wanted to blog becouse i dont want any of it to be true.
i am going to try and go for a walk today with mum to the local shops, only 5mins from my house, havnt been out in a few days now which makes going out again harder. want to buy something to distract me.
thanks for listening.x