Day 1 of 6

Afternoon guys how's everyone doing today?

My first day of no work and its not been great. Just been thinking about everything and analysing my situation. So I'm not exactly in the best of moods. I'm trying to be positive or at least look it as I'm looking after my niece today, but I'm not sure how good I'm doing. Just can't get motivated to do anything. We have jut been relaxing and watching movies, but I'm not getting into nothing just listening to the noises in the background really.

Finding it hard today I'm really missing my ex more that I have in the last few days. Just struggling to get past this.

I'm out this weekend with friends and family to celebrate my birthday so there will probably be drink involved just not sure if a drunk me is a good idea at the minute. That's all I need is to be drunk and emotional.

Hopefully tomorrow will be easier as I'm taking niece out swimming and for lunch so that should keep me busy.

[Pickle165]

will......your smiling!!!!!!! yay! you got the right idea no matter how your feeling, keep yourself busy and your mind into other things. when you go out and get drunk for your birthday make sure you leave your phone at home so you dont make any text you might regreat the next day. i love looking after my neice, she keeps me on my toes and theres not much time to be sad. have a drink for me xxxxxxxxxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Pickle165]

It's and old pic. Not smiling at the mo more a forced grin.

Yeah don't think drunk texting will be a good idea. I'll leave it until I'm out to see how I'm feeling before I decide if I should drink or not.

What's your poison? How you doing today?

[Pickle165 in reply to Hidden]

ooooo dont drink at all now im such a light weight, i can get drunk on a couple of alcopops. been in the garden today chilling, searching the net for somewhere to go this weekend. you look such a nice young man..........and how right i am with all those willy hugs you give out

[Hidden in reply to Pickle165]

I may take it easy when I'm out. I've been chilling out with my niece. Where you thinking of going?

I try to be nice maybe I'm to nice lol.

((((Hug))))

[Pickle165 in reply to Hidden]

made my mind up......taking my neice out on our mountain bikes and my boyfriends coming along so hope hes not his usally misery self cos i need cheering up after this afternoon. what you up to this weekend? x

[Hidden in reply to Pickle165]

I'm knackered after my swimming session with my niece lol

Why what happened this afternoon?

I'm out with a few friends to see iron man 3 tomorrow maybe a meal. Then drinks on Sunday. You got much else planned?

[Cookster99]

OMG, that's just how I pictured you, I've scared myself.

Remember to leave your phone with someone sensible lol, no drunk texting

I'm glad you seem to sound positive at the mo, long may it last. I hope you make the most of your days off as I remember how quick they pass.

Love and best wishes

Cookie xxx

[Hidden in reply to Cookster99]

Really that's kind of freaky.

Yeah no drunk texting don't want to make a prat of myself lol.

I'm sort of in between feeling positive and feeling the opposite at the mo, but I'm trying to be happy even if its only for my niece

How's cookie doing?

[Cookster99 in reply to Hidden]

Not too shabby will, I have councellors at 3 and I think I'm gonna fuck him off. I don't think CBT is for me. As I said to whywhy, it's the controlled bit, freaks me out lol.

I got you even down to the blue stripped shirt will, it's freaky.

You will be up and down and in and out at the moment mate but you'll come out of it a stronger person xxxx

[Hidden in reply to Cookster99]

Yeah it's prob for the best if you don't feel it's for you. Well if you can rustle up some lottery numbers that will be awesom lol.

Yeah that's exactly how I feel just call me roller coaster will lol.

Glad to hear your feeling fairly good today cookie. You've not been at te peanut butter again have you?

[Cookster99 in reply to Hidden]

Lol, no, I've been at the tuna mayonnaise, I have fish fingers and not for the first time lol, IM JOKING lol.

Oh god I have to go prepare to leave the house. Catch you later. Take care xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Will great photie...may upload one of me just for an hour or so...well done for putting a pic on I think that is a huge statement and I admire you for that!!

Most like me are afraid to...not because of how we look (well maybe haha) but because of the people knowing you and knowing you suffer...maybe it's just me...I can't seem to come out of the cupboard...I mean closet on it...I feel it makes vulnerable...anyway great pic......

Good for you..x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks think the only reason I put it on was because I needed to remind myself that I can smile. I nearly didn't upload it because it was nice being anonymous, but decided sod it. Not sure if I'll leave it up for good I'll see how I feel.

You still packing?

[Hidden]

Its a lovely pic and nice to see your face........ Its good to put a face to the messages..........

I only put mine on for a few days cos I felt like everyone in the street now new I had anxiety.. dowhh

Stupid eh......

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

No I get what you mean I was unsure about putting it up but thought what the hell lol

[Hidden]

Hahaha I'm still packing ffs hahaha...I just tried to put a pic on but won't let me haha will try again...if I can get one on I will leave it for an hour maybe hahahaah xxxx

[Hidden]

this is brilliant........... its like a mass therapy session.........xxxxxxxxxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Haha I got half my face on....I'm on an iPad and the bloody thing don't do full pis,,

Still packing.....hahahahaha hope I'm not losing the plot xx

[Hidden]

Will you look dead nice in ya pic.....very happy

[Cookster99 in reply to Hidden]

So do you, nice half pic lol, I know what u mean, every time I change my pic I have to get sim out of I pad, put it in dongle for lap top and then fanny about for ages lol. I wish I had the nerve to put my pic on xxxxx well done you

[fadedlizard]

Really brave, Will but nice to put a face to the words

I haven't been around much of late but I do keep logging in and I love reading your threads ~ always good for a giggle!!!!

Hope you're doing ok.

Love

Lizard.xxx

[Hidden in reply to fadedlizard]

Yeah just thought I'd try something different. Not sure how long I'll keep it up for.

I do try to keep thing light hearted no matter how I'm feeling.

Not great today. How's you?