How can I help my daughter

My 26 year old daughter has been dealing with alopecia since she was about 10. It started with bald spots which would regrow, only for a new one to develop. Over the years the bald spots grew bigger and more frequent until now she has alopecia universalis with not a hair on her body and has been told that it is highly unlikely her hair will ever grow again. She is feeling very low and demoralised and I want to help her get help - any suggestions?

I feel it would be good for her to talk to other sufferers, that she would benefit from access to good wigs - but these are expensive and money is tight. She has 2 young children and is a full time Mum but her condition has affected her confidence and going out is becoming hard for her and she cannot envisage coping with a job. I think that she needs help to come to terms with it psychologically, as well as with the practical aspects. I would appreciate any advice

8 Replies

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  • Hi KMG10,

    I have posted on your blog.

    PP

  • The NHS can help with getting wigs I get 2 per year from the NHS.

    It's a real confidence booster when you get a new one, a whole new look and it does help. If you can persuade her to have a night out, a good liquid eyeliner and even a cheap pair of fake eyelashes can make all the difference. It only takes one good night where you feel good about the way you look to help.

    As for the psychological aspect, my hair grew back about 4 years ago and then it all fell out again, it was actually worse than when I first lost my hair. Realizing that it's going to be a part of you the rest of your life really gets to you. I was put on depression tablets for a while after my hair came out again, it's important to be able to tell when it's affecting routine, day-to-day activities especially being a mother to know when you need more help with dealing with it.

  • hi there, well im 19 and have alopecia since i was 10 as well. i had the same thing where it would re grow and then fall out again. my advice to you as a mum is just be her mum, my mum would spend hours fussing over the fact my hair was growing back a bit and then when it fell out again it made me feel even worse. be there, support her, tell her she is still beautiful. the best thing my mum did for me was make me take a step and take my wig off in front of a camera, the responses i got where amazing,it made me realise that before i was hiding behind a fringe of hair and hair or no hair i was beautiful in my own way.

    tell her to be brave, bold, beautiful and bald :)

    hope this has helped a bit

    shannon

  • Hi there

    I'm AA, but been this way over 40 years with never total regrowth. I get so much how the depression of all of this can affect you. I've been on anti depressants and they help enormously - depression isn't a pull yourself together thing, its a chemical imbalance, and the pills right that balance. Much as they help, and they can get you to a place where you can look at other stuff, they won't get rid of the reason for the depression in the first place.

    Evenually after screaming I couldn't do it any more, I was sent for counselling. Best thing that ever happened for me. It wasn't easy by any means, and for alopecians it doesn't seem an automatic offer. But it changed my life, for the better.

    I went for CBT, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, but there are many different sorts of therapy so if one isn't suited, another may be.

    All the mental health professionals I've ever seen, have never dealt with an alopecian before... but with CBT that doesn't matter, because its not about what caused your issues, its about how you deal with them. We hardly ever discussed alopecia at all, very puzzling at first, but its how this particular therapy works, ie looking at you now and what is, not the history.

    So ask the GP for referrals, you can feel better alongside this.

  • hello! Have your daughter tried taking some vitamins and supplements for hair loss? I personally experienced hair loss and I thought i was going bald, But Glad that i've grown my hair back after I used Reloxe.

  • Oh really sad to hear .my bff was 7 when she had alopecia now aged 28 hear alopecia cured by using a special cream. Now she is happy and has a full head of hair now chin length but starting to grow strong long and healthy! Hope it helps

  • Hi that's good to hear, can you tell me the name of the cream she is using please? I would like to try it and see if it works for me.

    Kind regards

    Elaine

  • Hi she should be able to get good wigs from the NHS, you do have to pay some towards to cost. My dermatologist prescribed me 2 per year.

    Kind regards

    Elaine