new to ADHD

[Jordana1995]

Hello everyone!! I just joined this group today. I recently came to the realization that I most likely have ADHD. I have not been officially diagnosed, but will be seeking help asap. My relationship with my husband has suffered because of this & I have read a lot about this condition breaking up marriages! I have reached out to my primary care doctor to start the ball rolling on getting tested & getting treatment.

It is difficult to face that you have a mental disorder especially when you realize that you may have had this for most of your life & that it may be the reason for a lot of the problems that you have had in relationships. Someone else can tell you that there is an issue that needs attention, but until you realize it yourself, it does not get better. I have always felt different from everyone else & don't really do that well in crowds. I always feel like that everyone is looking at me & judging me without even knowing me. Does anyone else feel like that??

[MonkeyMindMom]

Hi Jordan, I just joined tonight. I don't have much advice, just solidarity. I've struggled a lifetime with ADHD and yo-yo medications. I am also here to seek information and support. Learning about early childhood development and the brain (Theory of Mind & Executive Function) has been super helpful. It was one thing as a single person but now I am a single Mom of a 3 year old autistic child. Here are two links that have helped!

Informative - youtu.be/JiwZQNYlGQI?si=SaT...(Not working as expected?)

Just Funny - aparat.com/v/bnoBq

[Jordana1995 in reply to MonkeyMindMom]

MonkeyMindMom --

Welcome!! I just joined about 2-3 weeks ago. Having a special needs child is something I can relate to. I have a son with Lowe Syndrome. It is genetic & I had a brother that had it too. It is a struggle having a child COMPLETELY dependent on you for everything even when they get older & normal children his age can do those same things on their own (shower, potty, dressing, medication, etc). He is 28 now & is about 5 yrs old mentally, cognitively. You get frustrated or at least I do, when all you want to is take a break from your mind & from the world where you are misunderstood, but you can't because you have a son/child(ren) that needs your help. This group helps so much, thank you for the links.

[STEM_Dad]

Hi Jordana1995 !

Whether you're diagnosed or not, you're welcome here!

We've got a good community here to help support and encourage each other.

.....

The diagnostic process can take time, and some diagnosticians will require a lot more evidence than others do. You might have to be patient and persistent. Some people have had to go to multiple doctors, psychiatrists, etc*, in order to finally receive an ADHD diagnosis.

*(An ADHD diagnosis can always be made by a doctor or psychiatrist, but some States in the US expand to include psychologists, nurse practitioners, licensed clinical social workers, licenced mental health counselors, and other health or mental health professionals.)

~~~

If you haven't done so already, I suggest that you take some time to write down as much as you can recall about your experiences that point you to ADHD.

• Include typical struggles and particular events going back at least the last 6 months.

• Also write down as much as you can remember about similar struggles in your youth.

• If you have academic records from your youth, such as report cards, that mention attention issues or hyperactive-impulsive tendencies, be prepared to bring those, too.

.....

I was listened to and observed by the counselor that first diagnosed me. My doctor then had me do an assessment on his computer. The first assessment took several sessions over a couple of months...the second opinion confirmation took about half an hour. (The same doctor totally missed the symptoms the previous year, and thought I was only dealing with anxiety then. He reconsidered after reviewing the counselor's notes.)

If and when you get to the medication stage, be patient with that, too. You might have to try different medications and dosages over several months to find what works best for you. (Giving your doctor timely feedback about what you're experiencing is an important part of the process.)

[Mamamichl]

his is definitely normal to feel this way before diagnosis. Generally right after diagnosis, there’s remorse about not being treated. Make sure you establish care with a counselor as you move through this process. It helps you learn to deal with this appropriately. Luckily my partner and I both have afhd and portray it differently due to our childhoods. Our coping mechanisms help the others flaws. My biggest trouble has been in my career. However, my ex also has it (before I was diagnosed) and we mixed like water and oil. Sometimes you learn through the dark times of relationships to find one that works better.