Everything seems difficult

[Confusedillustrator]

Hi, I’m 18 was just diagnosed with adhd as a specific learning disability along with dyslexia, my official medical assessment is in June, but I’m finding everything different and difficult, I can’t seem to do anything and I’m getting behind and overwhelmed and my parents just don’t seem to understand or support me, I just feel like I’m ruining everything and I’m getting frustrated like I can’t explain why I can’t do anything

[BlueDaydreamer]

Hi, Confusedillustrator. You are not ruining everything. Either one of those things is enough to cause problems. I'm sorry your parents don't seem to understand or support you. This is NOT your fault. It IS hard to explain why you can't do anything when you don't know much about ADHD or dyslexia. I'm sorry, I don't know a lot about dyslexia, but it does sound like a huge hurdle to overcome. I'm not saying you can't do it, with help, but you deserve the help. I would suggest getting an audiobook on ADHD, if they are available and you can afford it. If you are in the US you might be able to get one at the public library. Each library is different, so it probably depends on your city. I will help you a little bit. Tell your parents that there is a problem with the use of certain neurotransmitters in your brain, just like other people with ADHD. That medication can help with ADHD, and specialized teachers can help with the dyslexia. It won't cure things, but on the other hand, people with ADHD tend to be creative, and able to think "outside the box". It is just difficult having an atypical brain in a world made for neurotypical people. It will take some time to get used to it. It can cause depression and anxiety as well, because of ther late diagnoses of ADHD. Your parents may be in denial. You, and your parents may need to grieve the diagnosis, although, for me, it was also a relief- to have a reason I was like this. I'm sorry you are going through this without their support. I hope that that changes soon. Take care! Blue

[Confusedillustrator in reply to BlueDaydreamer]

Thank you for this, my brother is autistic so I don’t understand why they’d be in denial, it’s honestly frustrating especially with university at the moment. My mum just told me that I’m not trying hard enough but she doesn’t understand that the simplest tasks can be the most exhausting for me. It’s like I physically can’t do the important things I need to do, it’s hard to explain when I don’t understand it myself.

[BlueDaydreamer in reply to Confusedillustrator]

Tell your mom that brain scans of people with ADHD show that the harder someone with ADHD tries to do something, the less brain activity in the executive function area of the brain. It isn't that you AREN'T trying hard enough, it is just that when you try, your brain doesn't react like other people's brains. By the way, they could have relied on you to be the "normal" one, but you aren't neurotypical, so they could be still in denial. Like I said before it is NOT YOUR FAULT! I'm so sorry you are hearing this because it just makes things that much harder. Tell her to check out thewebsite adhdrollercoaster.org/. It has resources for loved ones of people with ADHD. I think it might be geared toward spouses, but it could still be helpful for other family and friends that don't understand. Is the school able to accomodate you? Or do you need the official diagnosis first? Things will get better Confusedillustrator! Take care!

[Spacehead]

I’m 43. Just diagnosed with ADHD. Previously diagnosed with OCD anxiety and whatever that disability with math is, I’m sure I have that. I understand what you’re going through to a point. I hardly have any talents. I rarely understand finances. Buying a house was a night. If it wasn’t for my wife I’m sure my life would be much harder. College was a nightmare. My first job was even worse. I know many don’t like hearing Jesus’s name but read the stuff he talks about He was misunderstood. Seen as strange. Then eventually killed. He created us but also made himself as a man and went through the same crap we go through and worse. I know a lot of people don’t like hearing about this kind of stuff but I didn’t grow up in the church and it really has been helping me. That my life is perfect but God carries me through my issues and others issues. It’s not what you do and how well you do it that defines you. It’s who you are. Who God says you are. Your wonder created life with flaws like every person. I wish you well. I still struggle too. I am right now.

[Spacehead]

1 Corinthians 1:20 (NAS): Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?