What do you do when you are successful?

[AEppinette]

I have been on top of everything. Literally EVERYTHING. I don't know what to do now. My life is somewhat on track and I have been getting most things checked off my "to-do" list. I actually have time...I don't know what to do with it. I have hobbies, but it just feels weird to be able to do them...without it being procrastination. I have anxiety about having free time to do whatever. I feel like I should be doing something or behind in my "to-do" list. I have never had this feeling of actually being content with my accomplishments of the day. It feels weird because this "success" is so foreign to me. What do you do when you have unexpected free time?

[zonarosso]

Congrat's on reaching your state of life and well being! It feels weird to have 'free' time, but the guilt I feel because of the 'American work ethic' (i.e. work is what makes us valuable) is frustrating. I have come to terms with that by doing things that improve me! My mental health, my physical health, and just doing something fun. It's strange we have to give ourselves permission to be nice to ourselves. I read fiction sometimes but mostly books on spirituality (Buddhism is uniquely beneficial as a way to approach life) to help me deal with day to day life which, right now, is REALLY challenging for me as an ADDer, introvert, empath. The amount of negative energy in the world now is quite challenging. Mediation ties right into that and I try to spend an hour each day sitting in mindfulness, which is noticing your thoughts and realizing you have the power to not give energy to them. There are lots of YouTube vid's for guided mediation and mindfulness. Yoga is an integral of my life and I love to walk too, especially in nature which gets me closer to the truly understanding that I am a small speck in this grand experience of life. Gratitude and humility, for me, is essential to accepting who I am and how I look at the world. Good Luck!

[AEppinette in reply to zonarosso]

Thank you!

I think I am going to have to switch my mindset that my hobbies are procrastination since they were more stimulating to me mentally and it released that dopamein rush in my brain. Meditation has been a subject I have been interested in, but find it hard to concentrate on when I have a very loud and rambunctious family. I understand what you mean by "American work ethic." That has been so ingraned in us as a society that I didn't realize it was a form of brain washing; sacrifice+insanity=value. I have never been in this position before where I allow myself guilt free time. It will take some getting used to. Not even when I was in young did I have free time. After school there were always activities, sports or clubs for me to go to.

[zonarosso in reply to AEppinette]

Noise canceling headphones have been a blessing for me!

[AEppinette in reply to zonarosso]

I have those, but with my family I am constantly being interrupted for one thing or another. I have set boundaries but those only go so far when you are the only able bodied one.

[theycallnemo in reply to zonarosso]

I wear mine 24/7 😂 it's gotten to the point where people have called me a cyborg! I used to hate that but I don't mind it anymore- life is too loud sometimes. Besides, it's nice to be able to add some soundtrack to life at a moment's notice!

[GreenWitch91]

I can totally relate to this! I recently joined a patreon called The Mini ADHD Coach (she makes illustrated mood trackers, med tracker, to do tasks with time slots, morning and night habits) it's one of the best things I've ever done for myself. I also started psychotherapy and have bought several self help books (my two favourites are Calming the Emotional Storm DBT and an empath workbook that incorporates mindfulness and holistic pagan approaches like which crystals help ground empaths and so on). I also need a strict routine in order to be able to self regulate and have anxiety when I have free time too. I think it's important to be gentle to ourselves and remind our mind and body that rest is essential! 🙂

[theycallnemo in reply to GreenWitch91]

Oh, I LOVE Mini ADHD Coach! Her art style is so cute 😊

[theycallnemo]

Hi AEppinette!

When I have free time I tend to end up creating projects for myself or hyperfocusing on topics that interest me- I may decide to make a series of art peices, start writing something, sew a new outfit, or just sit on my computer all day researching North Sentinel Island or regional foraging. I can relate to it feeling weird to just have amorphous free time... it's occurring to me now that a lot of my life practices revolve around goals 😂. It's difficult to do this now, but I also like to use my free time to either plan or go on trips that are relevant to my interests (though not to North Sentinel of course! lol). That also can help to spark my inspiration and find a new idea to spend free time on.

I love your profile picture by the way, I started watching Sailor Moon a few months ago!

[AEppinette in reply to theycallnemo]

I have been getting back into my creative mind set. I have time now to bring my projects/ideas to fruition. it brings me great happiness to see something i enjoy doing come to life.