"ADD is like having an instruction manual but its not in a language you know, so you cant use the tools in your toolbox"

[strive2thrive25]

"I admire that you are so self-aware" does anyone else receive this feedback from others when you are discussing some challenges ADHD comes with? Yeah I am self aware, I know exactly where I struggle, but this does not mean just because I know what it is that it magically is cured. Honestly, in my experience i feel this Executive Function Disorder I am managing has a lot to do with the fact that there is lack of a compelling self-dialogue. Medication allows me to be more active in my inner conversation . I'm currently working toward not needing the external stimuli to prompt me to do what I want to get done

[Hidden]

Ok so you got the hardest part done actually. I relate to you 100%!

You have identified self awareness and know that it’s within you to do things. Now what’s left, from my experience now, is getting to know yourself a bit more. You are another being and a being that accepts your own commands.

I call it “lying to myself the right way.”

Another great thing is that you’re aware of your flaws. Spend your days, telling yourself you don’t want whatever behavior your doing and the more you do that the easier you will see it becomes to rid yourself of bad habits.

I hyperfocus a lot and stay in my head during the day and also when going to bed at night. I focus on things that I have identified to be dumb and a waste of my time from being the best person I can be. Every time I fall into hyperfocus and zoom out and I become self aware of useless thoughts, I say to myself “it’s not time for this right now, it can wait”, I quickly find another thing to stimulate my mind with that distraction I created and the more and more i remember to do that. I think more about myself and hyperfocus more on being the best version of myself. “How can I bring positivity today?”, “what am I missing today to be even happier?” Asking questions like that helps me manage the “instruction manual that’s in a foreign language”.

Basically, throwing away that stupid manual and make your own instruction manual. Sometimes the manufacturing process gets it wrong and we have to do a little extra work to get things done.

You honestly have gotten past the hardest part of managing ADD/ADHD. Being self aware is key to being aware of what’s going on with you and why you’re feeling bothered and tired. And I used to think like man well this sucks and this is a lot of extra work. Yeah... but i find it better to have your own set of rules of management than having a generic may or may not work set of rules that so called “normal” people seem to follow. At least you’ll have something that is guaranteed to work and make you the happiest you can ever be.

Whoops my brain crashed here 😁 hehe

I hope this helps and you were able to understand my message. Love yourself always because you are the best person you can be and you should always try to be better than what you already are.

Best of luck and love ya, peace ✌️

[strive2thrive25 in reply to Hidden]

thank you for your reply! I like your strategy of "lying to yourself the right way"

(i don't claim know too much about computers but i hope this parallels or at least can be understood) I imagine brains are for sure like computers, so overriding the current program thats running is another way i like to look at it, also there is the cool part of rewriting the program. This gives me a little bit of feeling of empowerment. my imagination gets to have fun here like imagining that i am creating a computer program called "Me" hahaha

[Hidden in reply to strive2thrive25]

Yo!! Im super into computers too!!

I absolutely love what you do there. That’s all you need honestly to make the best out of what just is and always will be. It’s about having fun with it and being happy and not looking at the down sides of it and being depressed.

I really really do love how you put that and yes! You’re on the right track. I too know very little and don’t come from a place where I’m acting as an all knowledgeable entity. I speak and say the things that work for me with hopes that it helps others too.

It’s funny. We seem to doubt ourselves most when little do we know, we have always known OUR answer because really there is no answer. There’s only YOUR answer that YOU know. Others can guide you to your place of ease and comfort but notice how advice of others doesn’t ever get you directly there (your peace of mind) it only helps YOU find YOUR pathway that YOU only know.

Find your secret hideaway and stay there forever and invite others by sharing what you know and never hold back. There’s no secret to anything, there’s only YOUR secret to YOURSELF because there’s not a single way of being distinct in how you describe your secret hideaway. You can only give hints. And these hints are keys for others to finding their own peace of mind.

I’m a bit ignorant with computers sometimes so correct me if I’m wrong, like any Unix system, the goal is finding your dot file and never rm’ing that shit because believe me, it’s possible to rm -rf that sucker. I just came back from losing myself due to never knowing why I didn’t understand or focus on the things I loved most. Only for a few seconds or minutes could I hold interest in those things and the adhd explains all of it.

Never lose hope and never bring yourself down because you have something that no one else has. And that’s the ability to relate to anyone else that can relate to you. Just like me.

Thanks for replying and I’m happy I could help. Keep your head up, love yourself and look at the beauty of all disasters and creations (everything in life).

Love y’all peace out ✌️

[Hidden]

Wow. Yes, I agree with you that alot of executive function difficulties comes from lack of internal dialogue, not just in executing things but also taking charge of the overactive cognitive thoughts. I am also working on developing an inner dialogue and when I remember to do it, it works. I'm still have to put a sticky note up to remind me that I can developer that. Thanks, you're comment reminded me of self inner dialogue, and I had forgotten about that.

[strive2thrive25 in reply to Hidden]

thank you for your reply. the hardest part for me right now is remembering that I have the tools in the moment (acknowledging my emotions in the moment and redirecting inner dialogue xD) I'm glad i could help remind you!

[Hidden in reply to strive2thrive25]

Hence, I'm going to start a sticky note tool box in my wall and the first one is going to bee inner dialogue