ADHD/ASD Anger

[HanDor]

My 14 yo son cannot control his emotions, especially anger. He has been in a from of therapy for years but doesn't implement what is taught. Has anyone dealt with this and how do you get your kid to understand therapy is work?

[Cherrice]

additudemag.com/rejection-s...

[Momtrying]

Is he on any kind of medication for his ADHD? That helps my son a lot to regulate himself

[Onthemove1971]

Welcome to the group. Can you share what type of tools you are using to help your son?

Many children with ADHD don't have the skills to communicate their anger.

Also, do you think learning a new style of parenting could benefit your family? It takes many years to understand this disorder and how best to help them. But in the end it really pays off. For example I punish forward. So if our son refuses to do something ( usually get off the electronic devices) I do not confront it at the moment( some parents decrease the battery in the device so it shuts off or they shut down the wifi).

At night, I lock up the devices an tell him the next day, because you didn't get off the device when you were told yesterday, today there is no device. There are many ways we parent differently with our son.

I am hoping we all can help you deal with your son.

[RichSeitzOceanNJ in reply to Onthemove1971]

Try to reverse the language - instead of punishing forward, reward forward. When he does well today, he earns the privilege of using tomorrow. It is a more effective mindset. Go to Pax GBG and Pax Tools for parents to see how to shape rewards to be effective. See Pax notes or Tootle notes. I will post links separately.

[RichSeitzOceanNJ]

Google Pax Good Behavior Game aka Pax GBG, and Pax Tools for parents. Change takes time and repetition. It on average takes 8 times seeing, hearing, doing something to learn it. It takes 26 times unlearning something and replacing it with something else.Here are a couple links to Pax Tools:

Pax Tools intro

youtube.com/watch?v=t952q7_...(Not working as expected?)

Pax Breaks

youtu.be/0KgkB8LOgAg(Not working as expected?)

Working from home

youtube.com/watch?v=DYsx5FB...(Not working as expected?)

Good luck. There are great people on here with lots of first hand experience.