Daughter doesn’t listen

[pat1026]

Hello I have a daughter with ADHD. She has a hard time paying attention, does not obey me, just wants to remove clothes from the closet and take out the food from the fridge. I don't want to give her medicine but I don't know what I have to do to get her to listen. She’s 10 years old.

[Onthemove1971]

Welcome to the group, we are glad you are joining us. Many children with ADHD have trouble listening. They are often focused on something of interest.

If she doesn't want her clothes in the closet, you could work with her to see where she wants them. Are there things she enjoys doing and you can maybe "refocus" her energy on something else. Her not listening is becuase she has ADHD, she does not mean to " misbehave".

Has she has assessments to see what areas she needs help with?

Most children with ADHD need the following to help them. Thearpy, medication and an educational plan.

When medication is the right type, dose and the right timing it helps them ( for those who can take it) so much.

Medication does not change their personality, it just takes the symptoms not wanted away.

You could look at all the messages on this site to help you understand what helps children with ADHD.

Hope this helps..

[pat1026 in reply to Onthemove1971]

Thank you so much for your advice

[wonders2]

My son is 7 yrs old with adhd. I resisted medications because I love my son regardless of his difficulties with adhd but it was causing problems at school and he wasn’t able to retain as much due to his disability. He was also aggressive with his 2 yr old brother at home. I decided to try medications to manage his adhd for the sake of his education. The first med concentra/Ritalin didn’t work out for him because he has a tic disorder and it was aggravating his tic disorder. 2nd med we have tried is Intuniv 3mg daily in the AM. He’s been on it for about 4 months now and so far it’s working well. His only side effect is insomnia so I give him melatonin to help with sleep. My son’s adhd is an imbalance and he needs a med to help him function at school. I’m happy with how he’s doing now. You can give Brillia a try it’s a natural supplement it worked well for my son but I had to discontinue because he has a seizure disorder and the supplement altered the seizure med so we could’ve continue with the adhd brillia supplement which was unfortunate because I did notice less hyperactivity, focus was still an issue but hyperactivity was decreased.

I noticed my son likes to organize and clean so I give him tasks to do around the house it helps him with staying active and it’s productive he feels good about himself and he gets rewarded too. Praising goes a long way. Best of luck.

[pat1026 in reply to wonders2]

Thank you for your advice. I will see about Brillia with her doctor as my daughter also has epilepsy. Hopefully it can help though.

[kvolm2016]

Hi and welcome. Glad you are here to talk with others and get some support/ encouragement too. There are certainly lots of strategies that can be used to enhance listening skills. Are you finding that her not listening is just related to specific things like the clothes and the food that you mention? Does the not listening seem to apply to school and other activities and situations as well? Even though she is not on medication, have you talked with her doctor or a therapist or behavioral specialist for listening strategies?

[pat1026 in reply to kvolm2016]

Hi thank you for answering. At school she listens, at is the problem. I don’t know why she fixates on the food and clothes. She also constant asks what we’re doing next and gets impatient when there’s not much to do. She just started seeing a behavioral therapist and I’m on a waiting list for a psychologist.

[kvolm2016 in reply to pat1026]

Glad to hear that you are beginning to work with the therapist. I'm sure that will give both you and your daughter some tools to help with the not listening at home. Since you mention that school hasn't been a problem, I wonder if it is because there is a great deal of stimulation at school and not as much at home which is why she is more restless at home?