My 15 year old is not getting out of bed - any tips?

[chakragal]

Good morning. Pulling my hair out here. My son has had a consistent problem getting out of bed. He has been diagnosed w adhd inattentive and it seems to have gotten worse. We are tying his behavior to rewards (ie phone .... which seems to be the only carrot these days) but he still is not setting his alarm and getting himself up. This week we had him set a goal and write it down - he got up one morning and made the goal but the other mornings he didn't and in fact stayed home from school one day (and it looks like the same thing is happening today) Does anyone have any ideas ? It creates an incredible amount of stress in the morning and I am running out of thoughts, patience and sanity. Oh and he's defiant .... so that adds to the mix

[Goofy1]

Hi, sorry you are feeling frustrated. Is it that he is not getting up for school? He might be depressed? Is he on any medications or have therapist to talk to? My now 21 yr old (no adhd) always slept in to the afternoon hours when not in school.

[chakragal in reply to Goofy1]

He's been on medication for depression/ anxiety for awhile now (we only recently got the adhd diagnosis which now I believe created all of these feelings that launched him into depression. He stays in bed as his form of avoidance.

[anirush]

My grandson has depression and anxiety and is on meds but is also on Guanfacine for ADHD. You may have to treat that as well as the other.

[Redpanda5]

I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. Unfortunately kids with ADHD will not get going on their own until age 18 or later in my experience.

I have to wake up my 15 yo daughter and I have to go in several times. I go in earlier than she needs to get up so the process doesn’t make her late. I am consistent with this - down to the minute. Each time I increase the light level and interaction so each day she knows what to expect.

Do you have a pet you can bring in with you? That can help. Also, I recommend bringing his meds to him so he can take them and lay in bed for a little while while they start to work. This may help his motivation of getting up in addition to the motivation of getting his phone.

These things have brought me some success so I thought I would share.