My 7 year old acts like a 4 year old. - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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My 7 year old acts like a 4 year old.

Edwards021 profile image

Even know some points he seem to meet his age level, but so much of the time if he struggles with the outcome or things not going his way he just winges and cry like a baby. I find this really hard to deal with :( will this eventual stop? Or any tips on how to make him stop. This year has been the most challenging yet with his behaviour 😫

10 Replies

Hi there. My son who is now 9 was/is the same way. The overreaction to simple things drove me to tears and it also had me worried that his peers would reject him. This behavior started in 1st grade and continued. He was diagnosed with Generalized anxiety disorder at the end of 1st grade and we put him on medication and cognitive behavioral therapy. This helped a lot but he is still behind in some of his social skills based on age level. He most recently was diagnosed as ADD/ADHD (less of ADHD) and he is on Adderall. It has helped him immensely. That being said, he still has his moments where he will overreact about things or act immature in his reaction. Based on my research and talking with his counselor and Behavior interventionist at school, I now understand that ADHD kids have huge issues with emotional regulation. We have worked very hard with him on strategies to get him to stop, think and then determine appropriate way to respond. This takes an enourmous amount of practice and to be honest doesn't always work for him in the moment. He has made huge strides but we still see a bit of that behavior. We understand that until he can fully control that brain of his to use strategies "in the moment" there will be bumps in the road. I know it can be so disheartening and the worry that comes with it regarding peer relationships and rejections is really hard. I've learned to take it day by day, work with him constantly, fill his bucket and teach him about being a good friend, practice strategies, etc. He is a great kid, funny, smart and just very very caring. I'm not sure if you have a diagnosis for your son or if this is just the beginning of your search. I don't like to give advice, but I do like to provide what we've experienced and how we handled it. Every child is different but they all have their unique gifts/talents and we should never forget that even though it is frustrating (believe me, I have to remind myself of this every day...) I might suggest talking to his teacher/school psychologist/social worker and see if he is this way at school to. If so, they should be able to provide some services to him to help him work on emotional regulation.

Emotional regulation was a big thing for our son! It caused problems at home and school. Broad spectrum micronutrients helped our son. Now he is more rational and if he gets upset he bounces back quickly. I highly recommend people investigate them. The two companies are Hardy Nutritionals and True Hope.

janeejo1 profile image
janeejo1 in reply to Cjkchamp

How old is your child? Which do you use?

Cjkchamp profile image
Cjkchamp in reply to janeejo1

He is 7. We chose to use Hardy Nutritionals. Our psychiatrist did not recommend one brand over the other.

Kids with ADHD are usually behind their neurotypical peers in maturity by several years, so what you’re describing is completely normal.

My son was the same way, but once we started him on medication the emotion disregulation completely minimized. I highly recommend you speak with a pediatric psychiatrist for help.

Yep, same here. It is called the 30% rule in ADHD. These kids tend to lag in maturity about 30% behind their peers. They do mature, just slower. I have seen this first hand.

Yes, same here - sometimes, there are huge tantrums based on nothing at all, and sometimes (especially since we started medication earlier this year), our daughter takes things in stride. She's in behavioral therapy, and they have been using a technique called "Social Thinking," which is for younger kids--my daughter just turned 8.

The behavioral therapy along with meds and strong supports that are all in communication with each other, have helped a lot. The school is in communication with the therapist, and everyone communicates with us.

Don't get me wrong, she still has issues with emotional dysregulation, and likely will for the foreseeable future, but she is learning skills and taking medication that can help her cope.

I feel your frustration. It's extremely frustrating to deal with, and often leads me to lose my temper right along with her! But we're all learning together.

Hi, I find that my 12 y.o. behaves more like a 6 y.o. He over-reacts when things do not go his way, acts very immature - farting, burping, laughing uncontrollably for long periods for no apparent reason. He has a tendency to invade others space and frequently gets in altercations with his school mates for doing things to them. I wish I could figure it out and wonder when he will start acting his age. It is very frustrating. The immature behavior is common for kids with ADHD but I am so over it.

My son is 13 and acts more like a 9 year old. Our kids can be 3-5 years emotionally and socially behind thier peers

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