I have a 5 1/2 year old son who has an adhd diagnosis, he has an iep with a behavioral plan, I have tried vitamins, essential oils, adjusting his diet and still have aggression, tantrums, back talking, throwing,hitting and so forth.
He recently is seeing a physiologist and they are recommending a partial care program including medication. They said that now is the time to help him while he is young and stilll wants to do rather right thing.
I’m looking for some options.
Anyone?
Tracey1782- welcome to the group. There are many posts in the group about this very topic.
Our son started medication around the same age. I am not sure what the partial care program is, but we found a different child once we started medication. I recommend that you ask to see a pediatric psychiatrist, they are specialist in this area and they can recommend a customized medication program depending on his needs. His general doctor might give you medication that is more " one size fits all". That is what we were given and it didn't help as much. Now we have 2 different medications that helps with focus and controlling his impulsive behavior.
Starting medication can take a while to find what works for his body. It is a journey, but once you find what works most of the things you talked about will decrease. It take a educational plan, medication and we also see a psychologist to help him deal with any issues that come up. We were told that medication ( when it is the correct dose and type) can on control only about %60 of the behavior the rest needs to be accommodating the behavior.
Best of luck with this journey, we are here for you if you need us.
Thank you!
It was a difficult decision to medicate my son when he was that age (he's now 16). Like you, I tried to manage his behavior with diet and vitamins. UltimateIy, I did put him on medication at the end of Kindergarten. One day, after struggling with him for an hour on completing a school task that should have taken only 15 minutes, it occurred to me that I was wasting so much of my time and energy on something so mundane and, with medication, imagine what he could be learning and what else could be done in that time if the struggle of keeping him on task was removed.
There is no magic pill, though. Medication will be trial and error, with finding the right med and the correct dose. With my son, he always seemed to do best with clearly stated rewards and consequences and consistency. The earlier you can get your son in with a therapist/psychologist/social worker, the better, so that therapy is part of his routine and so that he won't balk about it when he gets older.
Best of luck with your choice!
Thank you
This is the ultimate question I think every parent has to face, and a tricky one since each child is so different. We tried everything before starting medication, which is what it sounds like you’ve done as well. His is mostly inattentive type, not so much hyperactivity, so behavioral therapy was not the appropriate route for us. But, we did set up a 504 plan for classroom modifications, and tried various approaches at home. While these other methods worked slightly, our son was still not reaching his full potential in school and it was starting to have an impact on his confidence and frustration. So, we gave medication a one month trial.
We’ve been very lucky that the first dosage we started him on seems to work wonders. Of course, it’s not magic, but what it has helped allow the other strategies in the 504 plan and approaches at home be more effective. He has even stated he feels he has more control over his thoughts and concentration.
If you choose to try medication, I strongly encourage you to do so in tandem with everything else you’re trying, and keep your son an important member of the conversation. The more he can fill you in on how he’s feeling and the more he understands what’s going on, the greater ownership he will have over the process. We are big fans of the book, “my brain needs glasses” by Annick Vincent. Great way to explain ADHD to kiddos. 😊
Hope this helps! Good luck and keep us updated with your process.
Thank you, I will definitely look into the book also.
My husband and I are anti-medication, for the most part, but reluctantly found ourselves medicating our son for ADHD at age 5. The biggest concern was for weight loss, which was severe, we had to switch to another medication, which he has been on for nearly 10 years now. I can say with certainty, that those who need the medication, need it for a reason. It works because they have a chemical imbalance. The meds helped to balance our son out. It's not a cure-all. It should be part of a multi-pronged approach. Therapy and skill building, parent training, etc. are all part of the process. But it's a lot to expect a kid to perform at a level of "neurotypical" kids when they are physically challenged and have little control over. The kids I grew up with that weren't medicated ended up acting out more, got into the wrong crowds, had horrible relationships with their parents, and ended up doing drugs. That was my experience with my peers. Don't expect the pill to do all the hard work, but allow it to be a tool to help your child perform at their best. One day, at school, not on meds and I get phone calls from teachers, it makes that big of a difference. He's able to concentrate more and have less distraction (not only from himself but for other kids as well). We sought a pediatric behavioral therapist to weigh in on whether we should medicate and went through our own "parent training" to help him be more successful. Best wishes to you and your child. There are plenty of homeopathic options that can benefit, yes. We found improvement with Omega 3s, chiropractic, etc. But at the end of the day, the stimulants helped him be a more confident kid. As a teen, he looks back to his younger years of any outbursts he had (on those non-med days) and he is mortified, he feels labeled by those moments and ostracized by his peers because of it. Try to put yourself in your child's shoes and the turmoil they experience being expected to rise all-day, everyday to a level that is outside the norm for neurotypical kids. Just sayin'...
Thank you for your reply, I appreciate your statement about putting myself in his shoes and that's what is making me lean toward it my son is so happy and wants to do well.
I don't want him to resent me for putting him on it and I don't want to fail him as a parent by not. I absolutely continue with the homeopathic options, therapy and consistancy.
Hi Tracey, I completely agree with all the comments above. We didn't get correct diagnosis till my daughter was 8 and we made a decision to try medication. She also has a dyslexia so learning is Xtra hard for her. We tried medication that our Pediatrician prescribed, but had to go to a pediatric psychiatrist who found a better medication and the right dosage. We do see therapist. And it's still a lot of work. However my daughter is so much better when she is medicated, she is making progress at school and in her favorite sport. It is a hard decision, but I wish we new earlier so she wouldn't loose her formative years in school. Still grateful for any progress she makes day by day. For me it gets very lonely at times fighting a battle by myself, I hope you know there are so many of moms like us and we are each other's best support! Take care and good luck! Tatyana
Gosh thanks because I really feel like I'm the only one.
Here is a "school piece" to go with everything else you are doing, including possibly medication as noted by all above. Pardon the canned speech, please read all the way to the bottom.
The Pax Good Behavior Game used in elementary schools rewards focused behavior with timed short physical activity rewards that both let off energy AND help train self-control, self-regulation and self-discipline.
With the PAX Good Behavior Game (PAX for short), Children and adults who care about them in school, at home, and in the community are the heroes of making the world better, and bettering themselves.
The PAX Good Behavior Game is based on multiple “gold standard” studies of classrooms and teachers in the US, Canada, and Europe. PAX GBG may be the most effective strategy a teacher can currently use in his or her classroom to protect children from lifetime mental, emotional, and behavioral disorders while also increasing lifetime academic success.
Everything in PAX was invented by teachers at one time or another, and then tested by fire by some of the world’s best prevention or behavioral scientists. You will find references for replicated scientific studies—most of which can be found at pubmed.gov (the National Library of Medicine). Only one of the hundreds of studies related to the tools in PAX GBG is by the developers of PAX GBG. The science is truly worldwide, spanning the United States, Canada, several European Countries, Africa, and findings from First Nations or Tribes. There are more scientific studies about the components of PAX GBG than virtually any other universal prevention strategy for classrooms.
Cited by US Surgeon General and Institute of Medicine reports.
A couple of things off the cuff. Pax doesn't stigmatize or focus on "special" kids. It works for everybody. Pax is a refined version of the GBG used in the 1986 Baltimore clinical study cited below. Pax uses physical activity rewards (not stickers, not smiley faces, not food) such as doing the chicken dance for 15 seconds. It is much more effective than the GBG used in Baltimore, and those results were pretty darn good.
Pax can be used by one teacher or an entire school. It is difficult to get schools to buy in because every school, every principal, has their preferred "behavioral modification program" or "Positive Behavioral Interventions & Supports." PBIS is a philosophy; PAX GBG is a PBIS strategy/technique proven to work. Many so-called PBIS systems are ineffective in changing long-term behavior - catch them being good campaigns, raffle tickets, monthly awards, etc. have little effect on behaviors. Kids can game the system easily and the rewards are so distant from the behavior as to be meaningless.
Note the many people who say their kids are better at home than at school. More distractions, more people, more demands = more difficult behavior. Research on teens show that teens (as crazy as they naturally are in those years) do really stupid things under two conditions: excited and with friends. School can replicate those conditions accidentally. Using Pax with a physical activity reward deliberately replicates those conditions in elementary grades before puberty hits. Pax enables kids to practice self-control, self-regulation, self-discipline several times a day without preaching or taking time away from lessons. Pax used every day will strengthen the pathways in the pre-frontal cortex decision-making part of the brain through practice, not lectures! And because Pax is FUN, the kids and teachers will LOVE it. Go to goodbehaviorgame.org or google Pax GBG. Here are just 2 more references:
NIDA Notes. "Behavior Game Played in Primary Grades Reduces Later Drug-Related Problems." Volume 23, Number 1, April 2010. National Institute on Drug Abuse.
drugabuse.gov/news-events/n...
Bates, Mary. "Calm Down Boys, Adolescent Girls have ADHD, too." Psychology Today, June 2012.
Thank you
You have received such good feedback and information that I don't think I could really add anything. I just pray that you make the right decision for your child and that you will be comfortable with whatever decision that you make. I pray that your child has a successful school year. You are being a great parent.
Thank you for your support
Lots if great advice. I'd just add the book 'Dealing with difficult children', by Howard Glasser hit the spot with me describing my child and an approach which was a one last effort strategy which is worth a look at.
My apologies, the book is "Transforming the Difficult Child" by Howard Glasser and Jennifer Wesley.
I know your struggles , as my son was diagnosed at the same age. We battled with medicine or not in the beginning. After he was put on it, he took extreme strides in reading , by 2 levels, and was able to pay attention, had no impulses. You will find that one medication won't be "the one" forever, he will go through many kinds to fit his needs and it will be alot of trial and error. My son has taken a social skills class since he was in 2nd grade (2x month) and is still on an IEP as well keeping the communication with ALL teachers is key. But I have something positive about not being on medicine in the future..... My son is in 7th grade now and on his last IEP meeting they found that he just doesn't talk or engage in classwork, was focused somewhat, but when spoken to, he wouldn't respond really. We told them , if you could see him without, he is a totally different person (outgoing, loud, funny, has some impulses). They were curious and very open about having him try it without. The results were amazing for the teachers to see and enjoyed having him more involved. Again , this is a trial /error phase (been only 2 weeks). My son feels okay being without it and will tell you he'd rather be off it , but has voiced that he doesn't stay on task well, as before, but enjoys being able to communicate better with peers and teachers. They are willing to keep us informed on his behavior and academics as we go. IEP is the best program throughout your child's education years. What I'm saying... there is hope at some point , he will mature and be able to voice how he feels , and support from his teachers to guide him. Medicine is important in the early years of education for sure and will help with the behavior issues. Hang in there momma, it will be a long ride with some challenges, but with this website and others to support you, it will be rewarding
Thank you that is a positive outcome, my son is academically strong it's the impulse and behavior that's effecting him, my fear is as time progresses he will loose that.
I wish you well and thank you again for the support.
Thank you for your support
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