What's best? Feeling so unsure....

[SLPMom85]

Hello! I'm new here. My son was diagnosed with ODD and ADHD about a year ago at 4 years old. I'm really not sure about the ODD but starting to see more and more signs and symptoms of ADHD. He's in Pre-K and the teacher is talking a lot about inconsistency, and he is really behind with his academics. His behavior and speech have greatly improved being in PreK this year and I'm seeing fewer meltdowns and epic tantrums (like uncontrollable rage type meltdowns). He is VERY impulsive to the point where he is frequently unsafe, especially when he's excited. He will jump from high points on the playground, hurt others accidentally being too rough, and when he's going full force there is nothing I can do to make him listen to me or my instructions.

I feel like my family views him as poorly parented and high strung. They were very annoyed that I took him to a psychologist in the first place and made me really doubtful about any diagnosis.

I have never shared this private psychological with his school or teacher as I wanted to see how he did without a label. The teacher while expressing concerns and talking about his academics being inconsistent and he is not showing readiness for kindergarten is still wanting to wait and see....no referral for an IEP. Should I share it..... should I keep waiting and seeing. My mommy-sense is going off but I'm not sure what my next move should be.

He did OT for several months and it helped with behavior and ALOT with sleep issues. I am really looking for the best ways to help him succeed. I am worried about his lack of progress in the classroom. But the idea of medication bothers me..... not to mention the fact that I can't get him to take ANY vitamins or meds very easily and the idea of trying to do it daily sounds terrible!

Looking for resources, ideas, support...... and also just venting.

Thanks for listening

[dmjohnston0811]

What is ot my son is six. He is behind in school as well and acts very impulsive also. I am looking into changing his diet and alternatives other then medication. I am very surprised your son wasnt put on an iep!

[Teresa12626]

I wouldn't keep it from the school and his teacher they may have a better way of dealing with him if they know also you can request for him to atleast have a 504 plan if they don't want him to have a iep but you should be able to get him a iep if he has learning problems there is sample letters you can find online to write a letter requesting one because you want to put your request in writing

[sherishu]

The idea of medication was hard for me. But what finally did it was the therapist saying, "if there's a med out there that would ease her burden and make it possible for her to be her best self, are you comfortable withholding that?" My husband takes medication for depression and that really hit home for him. We realized we were downplaying the amount of hard work our daughter was doing at school and how the focus and behavioral difficulties were impacting her. Medication may not be the right choice for your child at this time, but I would try not to rule it out. It helped our whole family dynamic to have her on it, and allowed her to feel successful at school, which spilled over into other areas. She started in 2nd grade and she's now happily taking it even on weekends in 6th, because she knows how much it helps her.