What is Wrong with Me?

[GreenBootStraps]

Hello. I'm a recently turned 20 Male currently serving in the US Navy. I've been in training for 10 months (2 months basic, 8 months school) now as my job is more technical and demands it. I've been struggling lately. I'm getting sick of the same routine everyday but I've also lost the motivation to do anything new. I have a hard time making friends, even though many of them are dicks anyway, so I have no motivation to go out and do things with the people I work with. I spend most of the little free time I do have in my barracks room. I have a girlfriend back home but we've been fighting more and more recently and now I feel like every other night there's a new argument. But when we see each other in person, it feels like the honeymoon phase all over. and I still love her, and I believe things will get better when we're together more permanently. I also try to keep in touch with my best friend back home but our connection is slipping away as he's busy with college and work while I'm busy with training. My dad never really keeps in contact with me too much, and my mom typically will call me once a week, but usually will just get mad at me because I don't believe in god or I'm not the same as I used to be or something like that. I'm excited to leave my training command for my first ship, but Ik the days will get more stressful and I'm not sure if things will actually get better. I've started questioning the meaning of my life, and what's the point if I can't make something of myself. although I never consider harming myself in any way, I'm thinking I should seek professional help, but I don't want to because I don't want to be medically separated or held back in training if I have problems. Also I feel that it's embarrassing as a military man, I'd need to seek out help before even leaving the training command. So I kind of just bottle everything up and toughen out every day as if nothing is even wrong. To sum it all up, I've lost all motivation to really do anything outside of training, I don't go out, I don't invest in hobbies, and I always long for the day to be over so I can go to my bed and think about how useless I am. What do I do?

[Unearthed]

I’m sorry to hear you’re not enjoying your current situation. It’s horrible when you feel the way you do.

Im Definitely not in your situation, but when I’m feeling down and not wanting to do anything, I do the opposite to what i feel like doing. I believed this slowly helped. So maybe try and get out more/socialise more even if you don’t want to.

But it may not work for you? Hopefully it helps?

[Natsteveo]

GreenBootStraps

Well first of all its a honour to speak to a young man serving in the US navy

I'm so sorry your are feeling this way my heart does truly go out to you

I imagine being in the US navy is very mentally and physically hard because alot of your training I imagine is all physical and mentally..

But you've done the hardest thing by opening up that's a start..have you tried talking to your father and your girlfriend the last thing you want is to have that stress on top of what your already feeling .. I would seek advice medically though I know you don't want anything to jeopardise your career but your mental health will only get worse if you don't seek help I'm sure they see this alot with guys in the navy so they will be used to seeing people a little low and anxious I don't know because I've never been in the navy so I'm only guessing my friend...but I've suffered with mental health issues for almost as long as your age so I know how your feeling and I also know you need to speak to a professional as soon as you can

Hope this helps a little

Nat

[SirGrits]

Hey GreenBootStraps I definitely agree that opening up about how you're feeling with your girlfriend and/or partents might help. Strongly consider looking into the Navy help resources, especially after you graduate. I'm not sure if you would get boat duty or not, but get as much help as you can before you head out. I just think it'll be easier for you to unpack whatever's going on while on land.

Thank you for your service. My brother was in the Navy and I'm a civilian. Just by virtue of serving with so many other people he has made more quality friendships than I by a long shot. Hang in there and be patient, there are so many great relationships within your branch of service that are there to for you to make.

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You are depressed get medicated?