I think there is something wrong with me

[Hei_Ba]

For the past 3 years I have felt disconnected from myself, been sad all the time or just feeling nothing. The last 3 months it has gotten a little weirder. I just feel empty. Like my smiles or laughs arnt genuine, I just keep drifting off inside my own head. The Funny thing is though I should be happy. I just got my first job and a new pet ( things I have been looking forward too for ages). But then again I feel like I shouldn’t and can’t tell anyone. I feel as if I would come across as a bitch or just over reacting from my teenage years. I have tried too tell my mum that I can’t express myself and that I get these little panicy episodes but it just didn’t work. I can’t go too someone since I have already costed my parents a lot with Acutane. Someone please help.

[iwantohelp]

I know what you mean its like you almost aren't happy with yourself even though everything is going great it just isn't giving you joy. That is probably the case sometimes when I smile or laugh I do it for others to show people that I am fine when really I am not. And talking to someone about it is really hard I fell like I need to explain myself, and still, no one understands. Maybe it is Anxiety or Depression but I am not sure, I doubt you are either. Sometimes what helps me is keeping a diary/journal I write down my thoughts once a week how I fell what makes me happy what makes me sad. I try to do more of the positive things and focus on making myself happy. It ok to be selfish. Spend some time on your own even if that means just by yourself getting rid of every negative thought for a day or two just focus on yourself for a bit and inner happiness.

[Hei_Ba in reply to iwantohelp]

Thank you so much it means a lot

[kenster1 Moderator]

hi its our hardest hurdle opening up to our parents but its the one that takes the most weight of our backs.some people even write a letter as somehow it comes out better as your taking your time with it.dont be afraid it really will help you.money wont be an object but your health would be.