Above & Beyond

Im hiding away and i cant help it

Sorry if this is in the wrong place. Im new on here. I am struggling to do everyday things and coming into contact with anyone. I hide at home all the time. i have severe acne and even more severe scarring on my face. I feel like such a freak. Ive been to the doctors for years and get fobbed off with pills and creams that dont work. Even when they help with the spots my scars are still there. i used to be a fun loving bubbly person. Now all i do is hide away. Im on medication for PTSD due to having to flee from an abusive partner but thats a whole other story. I just want to know what to do im at such a low point. I cry all the time. I hate myself all the time. All i want to do is rip all the skin off my face. Cant look any worse than it already does. Sorry if im just being over emotional

4 Replies

First thing to do is calm down. You can't be positive if you're being so negative,

The second thing to do is understand what a doctor does. They treat you as a a person, a patient, who has physical as well as emotional needs. They would NEVER just fob you off. You most definitely got the correct treatment that you need. 100% guaranteed.

I had severe acne for several years and the most important thing I had to learn is that there is no cure. I will say it again for effect - there is NO cure.

You WILL get acne. The medication does not stop it. It never will. But you will get it much, much worse if you do not use the treatments that the doctors give you.

You WILL get scarring. I have lots of pockmarks and scarring but there is absolutely nothing that can be done for it. This is something that my body did and has nothing to do with what the doctors gave me.

I tried to use a couple of chemical peelers which made one side, above my jawbone, much worse and as a consequence I tried lotions and potionas that claimed to reduce scarring. They do not work and are not worth spending a penny on. (despite the stupid photo's on the websites etc they are a complete con).

I paid for dermal fillers and whilst I thought I was doing the right thing the results were non existent - again, another con. They actually increased the visibility of some scarring around my chin!

Sunbathing increases the visibility of the pockmarks so use a sunscreen and use a light foundation, which helps with an even colour.

Avoid all the lotions, potions, creams or gels from the internet or from any chemist - THEY DO NOT WORK.

The thing you need to do is try to relax about it, understand that there is nothing that can be done for it and get on with your life. If the scarring is too much for you go and see your doctor as they might be able to refer you to a dermatologist.

Don't think badly of your doctor - you have been treated properly but for some things in life there is little that can be done.


Thankyou for your reply. I understand that theres not much can be done for it. I cant help hiding though. My self confidence is zero. Im sorry that you've gone through all of those things for them not to work. I really appreciate your mention of peels as i was about to try that. Knowing me it will probably end up worse, so thankyou. I think i need to sort my head out somehow so i can try and get on with my life without panic attacks before i leave the house. How do you deal with people who are rude about your skin? I get it often and cant cope with it i just burst into tears.


The thing with chemical peels is that they burn away the very top layer of skin - they BURN away the top layer of skin! How mad is that? The skin is very complex but any scarring is through all of the layers, so to get rid of scars you need to get a third degree burn!

Who is being rude to you? If it is a stranger then they simply deserve a "Do you enjoy bullying people?" Comment.

If it is friends then a similar reply would suffice. I have stated to some "I might have scars but I am not ugly on the inside unlike you"

Most people either shy away from your glare or apologise. I must admit though it took a LONG time to get the nerve to reply to people. Even then it took seven maybe eight terse replies to people for me to get confident enough to learn that bullies cannot take it when you show then you're not afraid.

Sounds easy but tell yourself "Don't be afraid. You are you, the world accepts who you are, some people are just shallow morons."

It was a living hell for me as I have a stammer too so could not control what I wanted to say sometimes. I did get quite low, to say the least, if you know what I mean.

I found that the redness used to highlight the scars but once they calmed down and the acne was controlled the scarring did appear, on a subconscious level, to not be as noticeable.

Yes, you have scars, yes you are aware of them but you're still you. Sounds hippy but you're still beautiful - as long as you stay you.

Talk to a doctor about coping strategies as well as possible referrals to a dermatologist, although that might be once the spots calm down.


Thankyou for your reply. Its nice to speak to someone who understands how it feels and that its not just me. Big hugs :)


You may also like...