Eat when I'm happy.......eat when I'm sad......

[Emeraldwales]

Hello.

I am an extrovert person who just loves food, both because I enjoy eating and because I eat out of boredom, and also because I eat when I am sad.

I currently live in France, with my 25 year old son. I was widowed last year.

I think I am fairly sensible and intelligent, so I don't really know why I am so pathetic when it comes to eating healthily. I know and understand all the reasons why I should eat properly. I know most of the well known healthy eating plans, like Slimming World and Weight Watchers. I know about exercise and no 'faddy diets'. I know and understand lifestyle change.

I adapt quite well to whatever life throws at me, and I am stubborn and will stick at things until I get what I am working for. I did 2 degrees in my 40's with a young child.

Aren't I sensible and knowledgeable?

So why am I 5'2" and weigh almost 21 stone? Because I just keep eating. I was 15 stone, but acquired another 6 when my husband died last year......now I just can't seem to stop eating mountains of food.

Now you have my entire....honest....life story.

[moreless Administrator 7 stone]

Hi and welcome, Emerald

Don't think that you're any different to most of the rest of us, as that's a situation that we've found ourselves in too. A lot of our problems stem from the fact that we eat things that don't satisfy us and actually make us crave more! You're neither stupid, or weak willed, just stuck in a vicious circle.

Take a look at the Pinned posts section to the right of your screen (bottom if you're using a mobile), or in the drop down on the 'Posts' page (it says 'arrange by'). Read the Welcome Newbie thread, then move through to the challenges, where we hope you'll find at least one that will appeal to you.

Move down to the Topics, to find a variety of threads, collated into specific topics for ease of access and we ask that you also 'file' your own threads, so that others won't miss your important news.

Take a look at the NHS 12 week plan, as a lot of people have been successful with it, making sure to enter your details into the BMI calculator, to get a calorie allowance tailored to your personal requirements. Don't forget to take your starting measurements and a 'before' picture, as they can be very motivating on days that the scales refuse to co-operate.

To the right of the HOME page (bottom on a mobile), you'll find Events. In there, you'll find links to our daily Weigh-in's (you will choose just one day per week), our Daily Diary, where we post our menu and exercise plans, for accountability, advice and support and our “What's happening today” thread, where we pop in for a chat.

Be aware, that the HU app doesn't give you access to all of our important features, so we advise that you use the full website page.

We've found that to get the best out of this community, we need to be active on the forum, as it's where we exchange information, get motivation and inspiration and make friends. We hope that you'll join us here, regularly, too.

It's only left for me to wish you well on your journey

[Dodlink]

I so understand and you describe so much of my story too.. The head knows it all but something just stops the following through although we follow through in everything else we do!

I'm new to this site and hoping it will help me sort out all these paradoxes.

[Emeraldwales in reply to Dodlink]

Yes, I'm new too...........I suppose if there is no magic overnight weight loss pill, then I will just have to try to find something that works for me.

It's not the easiest thing in the world, to change habits of a lifetime, is it.

I don't know about you, but I kid myself that I will make the changes successfully, but not at the moment because of.........(out anything you like here),

I have decided, never having used a forum, or anything like this before, that I will try to be be honest to myself above all else. No point doing anything else............

Good luck...hope we both make the healthy weights we should be.

[Dodlink in reply to Emeraldwales]

My 'because of' list is endless... and the happy and sad eating is so familiar. Who knows. But I am going to give this a go. In the past I have lost weight well and quickly - being a competitive person - but then just eaten it all back on again plus a couple of stones or more.

One thing that strikes me about the NHS 21-day diet is that three weeks seems a good period taking in initial enthusiasm and going through to just when the frustration/boredom begins to kick in. So doing a diet in 21 day stretches may suit me and reboot my enthusiasm just as it begins to wane - particularly when the length of time shifting my weight to an anything near reasonable level is going to very long!

Being online may help too. Because it is going to take so long, I really don't want to share with friends/family etc. If I fall off the rails for a while, I don't want to see their pleasure that I am finally got round to losing weight turn to disappointment or spark lots of conversations. They will mean well but I will get ridiculously defensive and eat even more.

[Emeraldwales in reply to Dodlink]

Indeed....I am not ready to share for the same reasons. So many times I have said I'm going to do it...and failed...sometimes not even getting around to actually starting it.

It's good to hear that someone feels the same things I do. In my heart of hearts I know I am no different to anyone else, but I still feel that I'm the only one who fails so badly. And you're right bout putting on more than you lost........

[EllaMidlands]

Hi, welcome. I wish you luck with your weight loss, you can get out of this cycle. Yes you will still have odd bad days or moments but by being determined and focussed you can ensure those moments don't take over all the good choices you make. When you start to lose weight you will feel so much better. 🤞

[Emeraldwales]

Congratulations on your weight loss.

[ary88 Restart July 2023]

Hi E, thanks for texting,as I am in a similar situation,after 6 months of sharing with others on here,joining a weekly exercise class,where I can shake my excess 5 stone,I am making progress with following calorie controlled eating plan,I'm starting to lose lbs, but more importantly,pride comes before a fall,,I'm much less stressed,and more confident in the future, good luck on your journey,☕😊

[Brea]

Dear Emeraldwales ,

Welcome to the forum and well done for taking the first step. I am so sorry that you lost your husband, and that, understandably, your loss has impacted your weight. Sometimes we just need comfort and for many of us, food gives us what we need in those moments.

I recognise so much of the sentiment in your post. That question - if I am so sensible, knowledgeable, if I achieve things I set my mind to, why can I not control my eating and get to a body size where I am happy in my own skin?!

I only joined the forum about 10 weeks ago, something completely new to me too. Already the scales show a weight I haven't seen in years. What has really helped is

- knowing I am not alone, that others are facing the same struggles

- joining a weigh in (I'm a Wednesday wobble warrior) and getting/giving support to others. People often mention the benefits of small goals, like 7lbs at a time. Mine are even shorter term - I just want to post a loss (or at worse a stay the same) each week. Why not join us today? You can be sure of a warm welcome

- joining in some of the challenges (kicking the Ks and mini challenges) and having some fun along the way

- taking a turn at hosting the daily diary and some challenges. a great way to get to know others and put something back into this great forum. It also keeps me committed. After a blip where I had to post a weight gain last week, I might have disappeared into the background, never to be seen again! 😊 But that internal rule that says 'do what you've said you'll do' has kept me here and I am very glad it has, as another 1lb has gone this morning

Wishing you well with your journey. I hope you stay with us, and I'm tagging Dodlink as well, in case anything in this post is helpful, and also moreless who has been so supportive and has encouraged me to get more involved! 😊😊 thank you, Moreless. Best wishes to you too, Dodlink.