PCOS and feeling bitter about people arou... - PCOS UK (Verity)

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PCOS and feeling bitter about people around me getting pregnant :-(

AJ27 profile image
AJ27
15 Replies

Hi everyone, I am after some support and advice on how people cope with PCOS.i have been trying for 3 years to get pregnant with no such luck. My only option now is IVF as I have tried rounds of cholmid with no success.My younger sister found out she was pregnant 4 months ago with twins. I know I'm her sister and I should be happy for her but part of me feels like it's so unfair.i can't shake off this bitterness that she is pregnant but also that she is having two babies.I also have 2 friends that have recently found out they are pregnant and it just feels like everyone gets pregnant so easily and I'm the odd one out.Does anymore else have the same feelings? I hate feeling this way when I see someone or hear someone is pregnant, it breaks my heart as they have something I want so much. I feel like I will never have children.

Anyone's advice would be greatly appreciated.I feel like a horrible person the way I feel.PCOS and not potentially being able to have a child is consuming my happiness, I am not coping very well at all.

Thank you x

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AJ27
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15 Replies
Crystalmaze profile image
Crystalmaze

I found this website re Castor Oil packs. She suggests good for ovarian cysts etc Castor Oil Pack for Fertility Massage youtu.be/dkTUoxh9NSI via @YouTube

AJ27 profile image
AJ27 in reply to Crystalmaze

Thank you.im going to give it ago anything is worth a try x

Hancam30 profile image
Hancam30

Hi there. I saw your post and wanted to reach out to you as I'm in a similar situation myself! I'm currently on menopur in an effort to make me ovulate. So far I haven't responded. They have increased my dose so fingers crossed but if this doesn't work it will probably be IVF too. I feel exactly the same about people getting pregnant. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to see your sister pregnant. I find it hard enough seeing all my friends pregnant. I even came off social media as it felt like it was always in my face! It's a very lovely experience. 😘

AJ27 profile image
AJ27 in reply to Hancam30

Hi thank you so much for replying 😃.Its nice to know other people have the same feelings too and in the same boat.I was beginning to think I was not normal to think the way I do and is the only person in the world that is having difficulties.Its been really difficult with my sister I've got to the stage where I feel like I don't want to see her as I have to see her growing baby bump and don't want to listen about the baby stuff.Its a horrible feeling as I should be excited and be able to be there for my sister, but It just hurts so much and I feel like it rips me apart inside. I have come off social media too as I am exactly the same as you, I don't want it rubbed in my face. I was getting upset every time someone announced on Facebook they were pregnant, or seeing the baby scan picture etc. I just always think why isn't it me! I have never heard of menopur is it similar to Chlomid? I hope you do start ovulating when they up the dosage. How do you cope seeing friends pregnant? 😘

Hancam30 profile image
Hancam30 in reply to AJ27

If I have learnt anything it is totally normally to have the thoughts we do in our situation. It is such an emotional rollercoaster and the way you feel about your sister is how I feel about my friends too. I'm happy for people but at the same time I'm so envious and sad it's not me. I just take each day as it comes and if I'm having a bad day emotionally I won't socialise if I know a lot of the conversation is going to be about babies but if I am feeling mentally strong then I seem to manage. I think that's all we can do. It definitely helps being able to talk about feelings with someone close and not holding them in all the time. Menopur is an injection that contains FSH and LH. I have to self inject every night. I was terrified at first but it is amazing how soon I got used to it. 😊 Xx

AJ27 profile image
AJ27 in reply to Hancam30

I am a bit the same I have good days and bad days. Just feels like at the moment so many people I know are pregnant and I feel like I'm being left behind. I wake up in the night with anxiety about it all. A couple of my friends know about my condition but they have children so sometimes they don't understand exactly how I feel.My mum has the problem now being excited and pleased for my sister but then has me where she feels like she walks on egg shells not knowing how much baby stuff to say as she knows how much it upsets me. The next big hurdle is when my sisters twins are here not sure how I will be. I think they think it will help me but I know I will hold them and it will break my heart. Xx

Hols969 profile image
Hols969

I think you would be abnormal if you didnt feel like that so dont feel bad. The green eyed monster is pretty common so dont beat yourself up about it. You will get there in the end but it can be a long and depressing road xx

AJ27 profile image
AJ27 in reply to Hols969

Thank you for replying 😘 I hate feeling like this but when you want something so much and it isn't happening I can't help feeling bitter and that it's unfair. I try to stay positive that my time hasn't come yet but sometimes it's easier said than done when you have so much disappointment all the time. I have got to stay positive it is going to happen xx

Hols969 profile image
Hols969 in reply to AJ27

I would up the exercise to try and keep you mentally feeling better too. TTC can feel very depressing at times that is for sure....

AT995 profile image
AT995

Hi I completely know how you feel and I'm going through it at the minute. I try and put on a smile and it does hurt when they say that they didn't want a child and I'm over here like I wish and hope I can.

A week on Friday I am going to find out if I can have a children and find out what my ovaries look like. I'm really nervous but I'm so happy I found this group with people who are going through it too :)

AJ27 profile image
AJ27 in reply to AT995

Hi thank you for replying 😀. Its nice to know there are other people out there that are going through the same problems that can relate to how you feel. All my friends have children so they can't really relate what I'm going through. It feels very lonely at times and that I'm the odd one out. I am sure everything will be fine with you I have my fingers crossed. I know it's nerve racking but stay positive. Xx

CarolinePCOS profile image
CarolinePCOS

Hey,

I'm new here, and in a similar situation to you when you wrote this post. I know it was a couple of years ago now, I just wondered if you have had any success getting pregnant?

Caroline x

AJ27 profile image
AJ27

Hi Caroline,

It must be fate that you have messaged me.After all those years of trying and thinking I wouldn’t be able to have children I am actually 5 months pregnant now and having a little girl in December. I am not sure if this was due to me getting into a new relationship and being a lot happier in myself and not being as stressed, but I was so shocked when I found out as I never thought it would happen for me.

All I can say is please do not give up hope I really think being stressed and upset causes a big impact on your body and Mother Nature Just thinks you are not ready for a baby. Just because we have PCOS doesn’t mean we can’t have children it just takes longer than others. I know it’s easier said than done but please try to keep positive it will happen for you x

Kh84 profile image
Kh84

Dont feel bad i ferl the same way and i have been trying over 10 yrs with no luck and trust me im 35 now and feel like my times about up for me so yes it will consume your life and unfortunately i havnt fpund anything will help with that but the obvious which is having a baby. I know in my heart i wont ever and the sadness i feel in my heart is indescribable and always there.

Chocbox profile image
Chocbox

AJ27, you are not on your own, I am super happy for my friends and family, but also the why not me what have I done wrong goes on repeat. Then when parents take there children shopping and start screaming at them in the aisle because they are tired and don't like going shopping. I have had to hand my basket/trolley to a staff member and leave the store before now. ❤️ Sending you big hugs ❤️

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