Kidney transplant live donor

[Daveporthouse]

Hi all. I have been on the waiting list for 2 years now. Recently my wife was tested and found to be a match, we even have a provisional date in March to have the operation for her to donate to me. The trouble is that I am terrified of anything happening to her or both of us. We have 3 small children and it worries me what would happen to them if anything were to happen to their mam. I have been having nightmares about it for weeks now. I can handle me going through the op as if it went wtong the kids would still have their mam, but the thought of both me and my wife scares me to the point that I have told her I don't want her to donate and am ready to pull the plug on the whole thing. Has anyone else been through this?

[gilders]

I am currently going through the same process, but it is my father donating. I couldn't bring myself to ask anyone as I didn't want to put anyone in an awkward position of saying "no". I was lucky enough to have my dad, wife and daughter in law offer. Of course I am extremely worried about anything happening, I would not turn down the offer from anyone. So long as the person offering as offered out of free choice and understands the risks, I would be ok with accepting a kidney from them.

We take risks everyday. The small risks such as crossing the road are safer than donating a kidney. But you'll only donate once whereas you'll take thousands of small risks over a year. So statistically, donating a kidney is very safe compared to the risks you take over a lifetime of just living.

[Hidden]

I donated a kidney to my husband last May, and it was one of the best things we ever did. I offered to donate before he went on the waiting list as my research had shown this was the best possible treatment for kidney failure. He was reluctant to accept but I convinced him that both our lives would be better if we went ahead. Going on dialysis would have been far more disruptive to our family life. The medics will not go ahead with the operations if there is even the slightest risk that anything could go wrong. We found the whole process extremely straightforward. Kidney transplant operations are quite routine these days. For me, there was some discomfort following the operation but nothing approaching real pain. I had the operation Thursday morning and was home on the Sunday afternoon and able to go for short walks. By the following Wednesday I was walking my dog for up to 2 miles and, apart from being careful about heavy lifting, I was back to a normal routine. You are both bound to feel nervous, but once you get into hospital the routine takes over. My husband's kidney function improved within a few hours after receiving my kidney and he is now much fitter than he has been for years. Both our lives have improved as we can do a lot more things as a family.

[DenisQ]

Me and my wife are 18 weeks post op now and fortunately everything went perfectly aside from my wife experiencing some post op pain. I had the same concerns as you but was re-assured the whole way through by our transplant care team. Everything they carried out was through and carefully explained. I think the expertise and experience these days make the chances of anything going wrong extremely minute (lottery type odds!). But I would recommend raising any concerns with your own care team.

[Daveporthouse]

Thanks everyone. Will share your comments with my wife as we will be speaking about this tonight. Got a date of March 3rd for op so need to decide asap.

[Eastham18]

I had a kidney transplant off my dad 12 weeks ago he came out of hospital after 2 days I came out on day 5 I suffered from these anxieties you will hear when you get there of all the successes the transplant ward has. I'm sure it will go well all the best !!!

[Caitzmc in reply to Eastham18]

Just read your post on the thread earlier- glad to hear to transplant went well! Good luck xx

[Zhang643]

What if I can donate for you instead of your wife contact me [e-mail]