so lonely : My T started in January 2023. It was... - Tinnitus UK

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so lonely

WeNeedToTalk profile image
29 Replies

My T started in January 2023. It was intermittent as in I would have 2-3 days of silence and then it would return. I had got use it and was beginning to live life again.

Its been 10 days since it was last silent. When sleep use to be my only escape, I now can hear it in my deep sleep, like sirens blasting in my ears.

I’m currently on Mitazapine and I use the balance meditation app to help me sleep, but I don’t know if I can go through this again. 😢

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WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk
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29 Replies
perlcoder profile image
perlcoder

Hello,

Tinnitus in the night, when others are sleeping, really is desperately lonely - made worse by the fact that every hour of sleep lost makes the next day worse. I have had T for more than 20 years, intermittent and variable for the first 15, but louder and persistent for the past 7 - with nights a constant problem and by far the most distressing. I entirely understand the way that T can invade one's dreams. It is miserable.

Eventually, we do find ways to cope. Even at 9 months in, your onset is still relatively recent, and there is plenty of time time for it to settle and for sleep to become easier.

It is difficult for me to offer more than empathy - whatever small comfort that my give, but you know that there are counselling services / support groups and others who can perhaps be of more concrete assistance.

Best wishes.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to perlcoder

Thank you for your kind words. I thought I had habituated to it. So I guess I was gutted and exhausted by its constant return.

msspinner profile image
msspinner in reply to WeNeedToTalk

It sounds like you are having to cope with the disappointment as well as the tinnitus? I've had tinnitus for three years now and there are simply days when it bugs me more than others. I now listen to podcasts at night so I have something I enjoy to look forward to.

TinnitusUKPat profile image
TinnitusUKPatPartner

I'm just going to pop in and share this blog post from Glenn Schweitzer, over at the Healthy Hearing audiology website - it's about tinnitus spikes, their impact on us and how it may be a step towards habituation rather than moving backwards - healthyhearing.com/report/5...

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to TinnitusUKPat

Thank you the article was very useful. I went to a meeting this morning. While I was there I didn’t hear my Tinnitus. As soon as I arrived by home, I hear it again. So I have decided to get my masker back out. Starting the process over again. 🤞🏻

Summer60 profile image
Summer60 in reply to TinnitusUKPat

Thank you for sharing the link. Without doubt the most helpful article I have read.

Mammoth1 profile image
Mammoth1

Hi, I've had tinnitus for years every day, all day and night.I now take Betahistine three times a day after being diagnosed with meneries (tinnitus and dizzyness).

The medication helps with my dizziness, but not the tinnitus.

I've hearing aids, which I keep in day and night, they don't completely stop the tinnitus, but ease it.

Speak to your gp ,the hearing aids for me have been a god send .

Don't ever think your alone , just ask for guidance etc . X

Cookie24 profile image
Cookie24 in reply to Mammoth1

Do you sleep with hearing aids?

Mammoth1 profile image
Mammoth1 in reply to Cookie24

Yes . I keep my hearing aids in all the time. Unless I'm In water. I wouldn't get any sleep otherwise because of the tinnitus

I had to weigh up the pros and cons. A sore hear now and again or constant ringing.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk

Thank you. The ENT/Audiologist gave me one masking earing aid thing. I haven’t used it much because it hurt my ear. I maybe need to rebook in with them to show me again.

perlcoder profile image
perlcoder in reply to WeNeedToTalk

The effect of a properly diagnosed hearing aid on T does seem to vary widely from person to person. My hearing was good enough not to need one when I was first diagnosed, and I didn't think of them again until my T worsened those 7 years ago. My ENT sent me to a good Audiology Department where my hearing loss was identified (left ear mainly), and I was provided with an aid/masker. In my case it does help greatly in the daytime.

doglover1973 profile image
doglover1973

Hello there. T can be a lonely business - especially at night - as perlcoder says. When my T got louder I literally couldn't sleep anymore. It's a scary, lonely, dark place to be. Wide awake while the world slumbers. The good news is sleep gets gradually easier as you get used to the changes . Hang in there. There are much better days and nights around the corner . CBT is very useful.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to doglover1973

Thank you. I’ll look into CBT. I think I can self refer through the GP.

doglover1973 profile image
doglover1973 in reply to WeNeedToTalk

Yes you can. How soon you'll get help probably depends where you are. There were very long wait lists here so I paid for 6 x 25 minute sessions over 6 weeks. It was very helpful. A real turning point for me.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to doglover1973

Yes I have checked, its a 6 week wait for an iniatal assessment. Then a further 6 weeks wait for their text messaging service or its a 18 months wait for face to face.

doglover1973 profile image
doglover1973 in reply to WeNeedToTalk

Yes. That's no surprise. I waited months for everything on the NHS. A year for ENT, 18 months for HA's, 2 years for the hospital tinnitus clinic. It's crazy!

Kellythecat-74 profile image
Kellythecat-74 in reply to doglover1973

9 months waiting for nhs HAs . apparently they have them . Just cant fit me in with an appointment to get them fitted . Not sure whether to laugh or cry. Yes it's crazy !

777john profile image
777john

Hello i know life seems impossible to cope with, T can make life so lonely, and it can drive you around the twist but believe me , even if your T becomes permanent it will get easier and you will learn to sleep normally again, i was on mirtazapine and it got me through my worst period, i have loud T 24/7, i don't use a sound machine at night any more and i sleep well, i am drug free and life is good so hang in there you will get through this.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to 777john

Thank you. I thought I was coping but this new spike showed me that I wasn’t. I felt the article Pat posted really useful and today although the noise is there (a bit lower) I do feel a bit better today. I can’t wait to be drug free too. I’ve put in so much weight that past 6 months.

Hi,I to have intermittent T and it started in July 2023. I am not going to go on to much about my journey which at times has been debilitating but I have created my own tool kit from walking meditation, mindfulness, sound therapy(tailoring the right frequency and pitch to simulate my T and mask) and journaling which has helped enormously. I have rewired my brain and thinking about the noise that is in my auditory system. I keep my emotions in check as not to feed it or fear it. Distraction is also my tool so I set tasks each day so that the T is not my focus or attention all the time. This may work for me but not for everyone else. The T is different for everyone who has it.

It will get better and you are doing great. Its okay not to be okay. Keep going to the support group you mentioned. I will be sending good vibes to you.

🙏🏽🌷🙏🏽

Cookie24 profile image
Cookie24 in reply to

How did you find the right frequency and pitch?

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to

Thank you for your reply. I think I will have to do something like this, so I am able to cope when I have a spike.

doglover1973 profile image
doglover1973 in reply to

Great post Hidden

Spurdog1 profile image
Spurdog1

Hiya, welcome. T is a misery especially the first few years, and your hopes must be up if all of a sudden it stops. I'd give anything for that. I cope well all the time but miss the silence, and when i doi get it, its wonderful.

I'm doing fine now, and ive had it 20 years. You will cope,.... we all do.

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to Spurdog1

Thank you for your reply.

Yes, it has been like that from the beginning. I would have 4 days of T and 3 days of silence. The first time it happened, I thought it had gone. Only to be devastated when it came back. I then kind of got use to it. There was no rhyme nor reason for it, but I did eventually detect a pattern, it would be on for 3-4 days (longest run was 10 days of silence) Then when it returned it would be fairly loud, then over then next 4-5 days gets quieter until it stops and so the cycle continues. So this time when it went on for more than 14 days, I started to get stressed and anxious.

I went on YouTube to look at different sound therapies, white/pink/brown Treble Health have lots of sound therapies for Tinnitus and the one I used was 'Tinnitus Shimmer- Sound Therapy Relief' which sounds exactly like the noise in my head and 'Scientist CAN'T Explain Why This Audio HEALS People' by Binaural Beats. I play both together but not so loud that it is competing with my T it is masking. I have it on around the house, on my Google nest but only for a couple of hours or I am having a spike.

You can explore and find what works for you. The lovely thing is that you have 10 hours play with no adverts so could play through headphones.

I hope that helps.🙂

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to

Thank you, I will have a look.

Ssmf profile image
Ssmf

Keep on in there - I’m 4 years in & it does get a little easier, some days better than others. I found the Mirtizipine helped loads, especially with sleeping. Take care x

WeNeedToTalk profile image
WeNeedToTalk in reply to Ssmf

Thank you, I'm trying.

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