When a doctor says “its your age" and doesn’t provide appropriate treatment. Part 2 What to do about it.

[holyshedballs]

What to do if your doctor says “its your age”

When you are in a consultation, it is always best practice, in my view, to always bring someone with you. This is to, at a minimum, confirm what was or wasn’t said or done. They can also prompt you or speak for you. If they are speaking for you, make the doctor aware of this as soon as you can. This makes professionals act better and not be as autocratic as they may be. A good doctor will welcome another supporting person being present.

Be confident in your ability to challenge a doctor. Please do not be aggressive but be confident. If the doctor, during the course of the consultation says “its your age”, that is the time to stop the doctor.

A simple “can I stop you there doctor” should be enough.

Hopefully they will stop.

You can then say “I hope you are not saying that you are not taking my condition seriously just because of my age, because if you are, you are treating me less favourably than a younger person. That is age discrimination and is it illegal. Not only is it illegal but it is against NHS policy. Would you like to reconsider your approach?”

Saying this or your own personal version of this, should have the desired effect of making the doctor rethink their approach to your consultation.

As an anecdote, I accompanied my partner to the GP who did say “its your age”. When I said something to the effect of the above he said “no, its her age”. Because of the work I do I knew that the doctor had committed an offence under the Equalities Act 2010 and I could give him a legal caution regarding the offence, which I did. He went drip white and make an immediate referral to a consultant. More on that story later.

If the doctor still persists in saying “its your age” you have a number f options

You can

1. End the consultation

2. Legally caution the doctor and see what happens (not advisable for most patients)

3. Tell the doctor that you are not happy with their actions and request a change in their actions

4. Tell the doctor that you are not happy with their actions and you will make a complaint about them

5. Request another doctor.

In any case, as far as you can, write down as much detail as you can about the consultation.

The NHS will expect you to make a complaint to the doctor and the surgery in the first place. This is why your notes will be valuable. Write a letter to the doctor and to their employing body.

State:

1. what happened,

2. why you believe the doctors action were age discrimination e.g. the doctor treated you unfairly because of your age by not carrying out an individual assessment of a person’s needs

3. request a change of approach in the doctor or another doctor

4. request training of all health professionals in age discrimination NHS policy and Human Rights.

Hopefully this will provide the treatment you need.

If not, the next step is to try mediation.

Relevant mediation organisation include Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) Find patient advice and liaison services (PALS) - NHS (nhs.uk) and Equality Advisory Support Service (EASS) Equality Advisory Support Service (EASS) - GOV.UK (gov.uk)

I am not keen on PALS, its up to you if you use them or not.

If that fails, the next step is a complaint to the County Court and the Equality and Human Rights Commission. Unfortunately, this is an action you must take yourself. You will probably need legal advice to do this. Court rules say that when you bring a complaint relating to equality you must let the Equality and Human Rights Commission know about it.

For claims in county court (England and Wales), this is set out in paragraph 2 of the rules (known as a Practice Direction), under section 114 of the Equality Act 2010.

As far as the anecdote goes, my partner went to the consultant who saw that her condition was advanced. The consultant was fuming with the GP and wrote a letter of complaint to the surgery, as did my partner. She received a formal apology and staff received further training in age discrimination.

[RButus]

Both your posts are extremely helpful, and am sure will be deeply appreciated by everyone on here who comes across them. Thank you.

[Fruitandnutcase]

Wow! Thank you for that amazing information. I think you need to hire yourself out as a patient advocate.

I’m assuming the above information would apply to all ages I always feel really sad when I read about the young people who pop up in the papers having died from something the doctor thought ‘they were too young to have.’

Over the years a I have arrived at what I call the three ages of women

1) Too young to have anything serious then the poor patient turns out to have some awful cancer,

2) Middle aged a menopausal hypochondriac

3) Too old to bother about.

[Sparklingsunshine]

Great advice, nothing to disagree with except not everyone can have or indeed wants to have someone else with them. There are plenty who for various reasons have to go alone. And actually I've always preferred seeing a doctor on my todd. I always prepare in advance and write notes or bullet points.

I think the thought of another person in the room would be distracting and would put me off. Maybe though we should get into the habit of recording consultations on phones or other devices. So we have irrefutable proof in the event of any dispute.

[Gcart in reply to Sparklingsunshine]

I make a concise list under ‘ bullet points ‘ on A4 paper ‘. Allowed him to read and then talk about it as a whole ! which we are , of course . ,

Quickly read by the doctor, less easy to put across verbally in a neat , concise way.

Way forward. ? maybe . Worked well for me. !

[holyshedballs in reply to Sparklingsunshine]

if that's good for you... go for it

[serenfach]

I took my daughter with me on my last appointment, as she is a legal eagle. The specialist asked "and how much do you drink?". I replied "oh, about a bottle and a half of red wine" and before I could finish with "a week" my daughter gasped and said "A NIGHT!!!"

Made us all laugh which seemed to make his ego disappear.

I also went to an appointment with my GP and was asked if I minded a trainee doctor being in the room. What I meant to say was "fine, two brains is always better than one". What came out was "oh good, two brain cells are better than one".

[Star13]

To me it’s sad that we should have to consider taking a person with us to an appointment. I’ve found as I’ve got older and my medical conditions seem to have mounted up I’ve seemed to have experianced more and more gaslighting, arrogance and humiliation. I’ve also found that just having my other half in the room, often saying nothing makes all the difference. It should not have to be that way and it does not seem to matter at what level the meeting is either but it’s always with men! The bottom line is they are bully’s and they don’t do it when there is another male around.

So unfortunately I now always take my other half to a new male appointment or if it’s on the telephone, I make it clear that he’s also on speaker. If it goes well I may go on my own the next time but it’s like I’m sending a warning shot that I’m not standing for any nonsense which happened recently with my GP who wasn’t taking me seriously over a pharmacist issue. He got the message.

I hate I need to do this but I’ve learnt my lesson.

[holyshedballs in reply to Star13]

I agree with you! It should not be necessary but unfortunately it is, in my view.